fandomhigh | Entries tagged with government

"We have 48 days, I believe, until the inauguration of a new President," Steve said. "The Constitution mandates the date for when it happens: January 20th, which is unfortunate because it is generally--frankly speaking--stupidly cold in Washington, DC, in January."

"I think it was meant as a challenge," Tony said. "We even had a president die because he insisted on giving a speech in the weather once."

"Without a coat to prove his manliness, or so the story goes," Steve said. "Don't be that kind of an idiot, kids."

Look, America was a special place.

"So, the inauguration of a new President involves a public ceremony, swearing them into office and the recitation of the oath of office," Tony said. "Something that is actually in the Constitution."

"The President and the Vice President take the same oath, aside from the job title, as everyone else who works in government service," Steve said. "The military swears the same thing, as do Senators and judges. 'I do solemnly swear--or affirm--that I will faithfully execute the Office of the President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability preserve, protect, and defend the Constitution of the United States.' Note how it is sworn to a document and not a person."

Something the current guy had a major problem understanding.

"What do you all think of this? Is it reasonable or would you make changes to it?" Tony asked. "How are things different where you're from?"

"Is there an oath at all?" Steve asked. "Are there enforceable consequences for when you, hypothetically speaking, ignore every single part of your oath?"

Please ignore how Tony was trying not to laugh at how unsubtle Steve was.

heroic_jawline

Just another Thursday with Steve at the front of the class looking vaguely uncomfortable! "Right," he said, running his fingers through his hair. "Mr. Stark is...slightly different today...so I'm going to take point on our topic today, which is the peaceful transfer of power from one president to another."

"Which is a very important thing. That's happened for a long time," Tony said, nodding and trying very hard to project confidence and knowledge despite knowing fuck all about politics at this age.

"Either through term limits or by losing the election, one president will leave and another will take over," Steve said, nodding, "and it's important for the continuity of government--to keep things peaceful--that it goes smoothly. In modern times, that means a lot of conference calls and powerpoint presentations and people becoming rapidly familiar with what the Department of Energy does."

Yeah, that one was also unfamiliar. "Um. Power plants?" Look, Tony was doing his best here.

"And nukes," Steve added with a smile. "So let's make this more fun: if you were about to be president and had the entirety of the US government laid out before you to learn about, what would you ask about first?"

"Going to Disneyland?" Tony suggested with what was hopefully a charming and not dorky grin.

"Very helpful," Steve said dryly. "How about the rest of you?"

heroic_jawline

Steve was on time today, but still in his Captain America uniform because he hadn't had enough time to change from getting through the portal. "We normally like to convey some level of expertise in this class," he began with a wry smile, "but sometimes the best way to understand just how messy and ridiculous democracy can be is to watch it as it's unfolding. Elections were held on Tuesday and because of the Electoral College, which we've explained earlier, despite one candidate being ahead by several million popular votes, we still don't know who is going to be president yet. There are also a few Senate seats that are up in the air as well."

"Somehow that man keeps getting elected," Tony added, looking haggard. Because, God help him, he'd been awake for most of this.

"We'll do a class later on why people vote against their own interests," Steve said, handing Tony another coffee, "but for now, you get to watch live TV and watch democracy work."

Complete with crazy people yelling for votes to stop being counted in some places and be counted faster in others!

"Feel free to ask questions as they come up."

Though they can't explain the crazy people.

heroic_jawline

Steve rushed into the room, still in his Captain America uniform from the Avengers compound up in New York, and gave Tony an apologetic smile. "Hello, everyone," he said. "Sorry that I was running a little late."

The suit, at least, was very patriotic.

Tony smiled back at him and nodded before turning back to the class. "Alright, so this weekend is Halloween and next week is... election day for America. So, we felt something nice and easy would be best for this week's class." There was a pause before he added. "Also, there were spiders on the paperwork we had planned."

Steve shuddered. "So many spiders. So we'll talk about the power a good speech can have in keeping a government functional. There needs to be a two-way street between elected officials and the people who elected them. There needs to be truth, even if it's difficult truths."

"We have two videos for you," Tony said, eyeing something as it crawled over the desk. "First up is from the previous President of the United States. And another showcasing a time when political accountability was called out on a national scale."

"Watch how they deliver their speeches, their word choices," Steve said, "and figure out why it works."

heroic_jawline

Steve and Tony were in the front of the classroom again, but Patriot was nowhere to be seen, sadly. "Today we're going to talk about continuity of government--what happens if a President is incompacited or when one person is defeated at the polls and is replaced by someone else," Steve said.

"Anyone from this era or a similar world might think it's a simple thing where their vice president or winner of the election takes over in their place," Tony said. "But, back when this country was first founded, it was sort of a thought experiment? Where no one really knew if someone would fight the transition like they had with royalty back in Europe."

Steve nodded. "The transition of power is a very dangerous moment in a lot of nations," he said. "Yennefer's class--from what I can tell from radio--has been dealing with that, too. The United States, since our very founding, has had an unbroken string of peaceful transitions. When John Adams lost his re-election bid in 1800, he left. That was not a guarantee, though we've expected that to be the reaction in the centuries since."

Both your teachers had a sort of Look about them as that settled in.

"So, we have a song--because of course Broadway has a song for everything--and then we can discuss what you expect in regards to the subject," Tony said.

heroic_jawline

Today the classroom had a visual aid: a map up at the front of the classroom. "In direct democracies," Steve said, "your vote, individually, makes policy choices. This works very well in small settings: PTAs, some towns. It gets unwieldy in a national of 330 million people, which is why in the United States, we elect representatives who are supposed to represent our voices as they vote." He frowned. "Something more than a few have forgotten."

"These are called delegates," Tony added, avoiding looking at that map because it made him want to panic drink after the last time. Just to be safe. "States have a certain number of delegates based on population in order to represent their votes for presidential elections. Hence the less populous states having fewer and the more populous states have many, many more."

Steve nodded. "Every state's electoral delegate count is the number of Senators they have--two, for everyone--plus the number of Representatives they have in the House. And the electoral vote, not the popular vote, is what elects a President. Generally, the electoral vote and the popular vote give you the same result, but not always." Thus Tony looking like he was going to boot all over the classroom.

Look, they had this class for a reason.

"Sometimes there's just enough gerrymandering--which is a method of voter disenfranchisement that re-draws the lines of voting districts into a ridiculous shape in order to have a political party win by cutting off groups likely to vote for the opposing party--there's enough gerrymandering to do just that to make it so the delegates vote one way when the populous voted the other."

"The districts, where each Representative stood for about 200,000 people a hundred years ago, now stand for 700,000 people," Steve said, "so if you live in a highly populated state, like, say, California, your three million extra popular votes didn't translate in the electoral college."

This was depressing. "No other country has followed us down the electoral college road because, frankly, it's confusing and intentionally so, but it's baked into the Constitution and getting rid of it would take an amendment, which requires a massive effort," Steve said.

"So," Tony said with false cheer. "Let's discuss how you feel about this method of governance."

Because your teachers had Some Opinions.

"And then you can play around with the map to see how you can get to 270 votes," Steve said.

heroic_jawline

"With American Election Day only two months away," Steve began, "we will absolutely be focusing on that in later classes, but today we're going to talk about judges and what a lifetime appointment, rather than being elected a judge, means."

"Now, for those who are more familiar with the US system of government, these are the Federal Judges," Tony added. "They are appointed by the President and approved by the Senate. Their terms are, as Captain Rogers said, for life. They may retire or be removed from office due to misconduct as well."

Steve nodded. "They can be impeached and removed by the Congress just like a President or a member of the Cabinet. It doesn't happen very often, though. Only 15 judges in history have been impeached, and just 8 have been convicted and removed. Most see the writing on the wall and resign instead."

"Judges hold a great deal of power over the interpretation of the law and changes therein. Many court cases have had a major impact on this country for good or for ill," Tony said. "But, like we said before, they are appointed and therefore usually have political agendas. True impartiality isn't likely. Does that mean the system is flawed? Do you think appointments should be limited? Or would that simply turn into a revolving door of agendas?"

imafuturist

Steve and Tony were at the front of the classroom and Steve had official-looking papers in front of him. "In a functioning democracy, the best way for ordinary citizens to enact their will is through voting. Some nations automatically register everyone as they come of age, some mandate the very act of voting."

"Some nations have political parties that do everything they can to remove the rights and capability of people to vote," Tony added dryly. "Up to and including trying to get rid of the postal service."

Oh, you kids were in for a fun semester here.

Steve had on his Extremely Disappointed Face. "And when the only way you can win is if you cheat, well, that's not very fair, is it?"

"So," Tony said, clapping his hands together. "We'll be doing a demonstration of how important voting can be by asking you all to vote on a few subjects concerning this class. In addition to asking for your names and what sort of governments you're all used to back home."

Steve nodded. "We'll start. I'm Steve Rogers, and I'm from the United States. I'm used to a representative democracy."

Which was why he was so annoyed right now.

"I'm Tony Stark," he added. "And I'm also from the United States and used to a representative democracy."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Well before you start crying because we've come to our last class together," Josh said, "have a bagel and a cup of coffee or hot chocolate or whatever in the back. Then grab an exam and try not to let your tears of despar make it impossible for me to grade what you wrote."

Thanks for that, Josh.

"See you around this summer--I'm teaching a field trip course if you're not graduating, and if you are, well, remember that I went to both Harvard and Yale and that makes me just about the coolest person you'll ever meet."

Uh huh.

"Have a good summer."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Morning," Josh said, sipping from his mug of coffee out in front of a big white house.

Erm.

White House. It was field trip time! "This is the last class before the final, so I thought I should take you to where it all happens."

And to show off that he still had this kind of access. Cough. "This is the White House. We can get a tour today because President Santos is off in Texas for the Easter holidays."

A leggy blonde woman approached with a clipboard and a ready smile. "Hi, everyone. I'm Donna Moss and Josh has been bitching to me about you all semester."

"I haven't been bi--"

Donna cut him off with the ease of years of practice at this. "I'm the First Lady's Chief of Staff, so instead of just getting to see the West Wing, where the President's staff works, you can also see the East Wing, where I work."

"No one likes the East Wing very much," Josh interjected.

"No one cares what you think, Josh."

Josh grinned at her. "Right then. We'll go through the White House and I will regale you of tales of glory, and then we will eat the finest muffins and bagels in all the land."

"...you never said anything about needing bagels, Josh."

"Well, I am now."

"You think I can just make bagels appear by wishing for them?"

"I do believe in interns, Donna. I do, I do, I do."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"The President's health care deadline--the big effing deal, to paraphrase the Vice President--came up last week, and the numbers of enrollees are in: more than 7 million people have signed up, even with the website problems they had that first month. Now the right wing media is spinning like crazy, accusing the administration of bulking up the numbers, or deciding they might not be the right kinds of people--that is, young healthy people, not old sick ones-- who have signed up. Last month they were proclaiming that there was no way the President could even hit his goal because apparently they have never seen the lines at the post office the night that taxes are due and don't understand that Americans are procrastinators."

He took a sip from his coffee. "My question is this: if the President managed to spin straw into gold or discover life in outer space or the key to immortality, how would the right wing media spin those to be a horrible thing? Go."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"All those in favor of pretending most of this last semester never happened, say 'aye'," Josh said, coming into the classroom. "So ordered. Okay, so when the President goes out, a great easy photo-op is to stop in at a local food place and take a picture with the owner. You can talk about the importance of small business, health insurance, increasing the minimum wage or whatever, plus you get a tasty meal out of it." He clapped his hands together. "So today's very difficult assignment: if you were visiting Washington DC, Chicago, and Austin, what would you order?"

It was possible Josh was just hungry today.

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Okay," Josh said, looking freaked out, "was anyone else chased by a monkey...pony...thing...on their way to class today? BECAUSE THAT IS NOT OKAY."

He took several nerve-calming (...ish) gulps from his coffee before continuing. "Right. So my bracket is completely hooped, I saw a pteradon yesterday from my window, and I couldn't think about how the President of the United States would handle this other than calling in the National Guard and vowing to never, ever, EVER do drugs again. So I'm heading for the library. You're welcome to join me, or you can go to the shooting range if that's more your thing."

He knew Fandom students' preferred methods of stress release.

"Okay, then! Venue change. It'll be fun."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Right," Josh said, sipping from his coffee. "In the middle of numerous global crises that the President must juggle right now, he also has to fill out a very important piece of paper so that sports fans feel better about themselves: the March Madness bracket."

He handed out sheets of paper to the class. "Right. March Madness is when 64 American college basketball teams face off in a single-elimination, winner-takes-all tournament that reduces the productivity of the American workforce by about half in the first week. The numbers next to the team name indicates how good they are ranked inside their particular bracket: one is the best, sixteen is happy to be there at all. Your job is to pick which teams move forward. No sports acumen is necessary. Last year our press secretary won the office pool based on team colors she liked. Now Obama has picked Michigan State to beat Louisville in the final. Today you can fill out your brackets and in a few weeks, we'll see who's won free pizza."

He grinned. "And if you beat the President of the United States on this."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Right," Josh began, sipping from his coffee. "This week the right wing has decided to clutch their pearls and wail over the dignity of the Presidency and how that has been lost because President Obama went onto a web comedy to promote his health care initiative. In case you haven't seen it--" he turned on the video.

"Bill O'Reilly went so far as to say: 'All I can tell you is Abe Lincoln wouldn't have done it.' Putting aside the fact that television, webisodes and electricity hadn't really become things when Abe Lincoln was president and that Bill O'Reilly is a pompous jackass...do you think he had a point? Do Presidents appearing on talk shows--Nixon did 'Laugh In', Clinton went on Arsenio Hall and played the saxophone, Obama's been on pretty much every late night show that currently exists--lessen the dignity of the office? Does the office need dignity?"

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Right, so if you've been watching the news out of Ukraine--and if you haven't, fix that--you might have noticed that all guys who are presidents aren't exactly created equally. For example if either of the guys I worked for went to Congress and asked for, well, anything at all, really, they would have had a six month fight about it, not given him a big ol' rubber stamp to march on into another sovereign nation."

He arched up an eyebrow. "If any of this is news to you, click off of TMZ for fifteen minutes and read some real stuff, okay? Today I want you to tell me how the president in your country--reality...whatever...thing works. Is he more of a Putin or an Obama?"

He paused. "And if he's a Putin in terms of wandering around shirtless on top of horses a lot, you can just skip telling me that, okay? I want to keep down my breakfast."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

Josh was talking quietly with a blonde woman and a dark haired man at the front of the classroom as the students arrived. He'd even offered the guests coffee (which Gert had fetched) because that's the nice guy Josh was, provided he didn't actually have to do anything.

"Hey everyone," he said when the students arrived. "I know you're all currently dreaming of Bali, but I wanted to show you that attending a school where you're taught baking by a giant pink pony and your hypothetical future children leap through portals to stop by for a weekend won't kill you politically. Meet Peter Wiggin and Natalie Adams, or if you already know them, say hello again. Peter dropped out of school here and is now running his version of Earth with the capabale assistance of Natalie, and they're both here to tell you a bit about their jobs and if they have a motorcade and their own airplane. You know, important stuff."

He led the class in applause, then took a seat in one of the student desks.

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

Josh, trying to stay warm, was stamping his feet on the ground in front of a small fleet of limosines as the class gathered around him. "Welcome to the Secret Service training grounds," he said, giving the tall man with a mustache and serious expression a grin. "Thanks to Special Agent Ron Butterfield for letting us into their facility today. He's going to give you a quick history lesson about the Secret Service and what they do for Presidents and then he's going to let you guys try to drive the presidential motorcade."

"One of the training vehicles," Ron interrupted quickly. "No one gets to drive the real thing without a couple hundred hours logged behind the wheel of the trainers." He turned his full attention to the students, and if you got the imipression that he could give a full description of each of you to a sketch artist based on that glance, you were right. "We are the Secret Service," he began. "We are charged with the protection of the President, the Vice President and their families. We've been providing protection to US Presidents since 1901.We also provide protection for high level government officials visiting from other nations and help with security for national special security events: Olympics, Super Bowls, inaugurations. Now obviously everyone in the Secret Service is not on presidential detail, but if you're in Washington, DC, you're considered emergency back-up and as such need to pass your handgun qualifications monthly with a 90 percent bulls-eye percentage, just like everyone on PPO. If you fail two months in a row, you're out of the agency." He pointed at a building in the distance. "Our range is over there and we pride ourselves on being the absolute best at what we do. We are not just a protection agency, though: we were oriiginally part of the Treasury Department and we're still in charge of stopping counterfeit currency as well as credit card and identity theft. Josh tells me your school is fairly...ecclectic--" Josh had used the term "whackadoodle", which Ron didn't think was a dignified word choice for the head of the President's detail, "--but some of you might have the training and skills to become a member of the Secret Service. We're giving you three places to try out: Air Force One Half--where you will practice getting people into and out of an airplane without wiping out on the metal stairs--The Office Building, where you have to climb fifteen flights of stairs and clear each floor of potential assassins, and Crash and Bang, where you get to take one of these trainer limosines for a spin."

He gave Josh a final nod. "And you owe me big, Josh."

Josh grinned. "I always do. Right, kids. You can try one, two or all three of those options, but please remember that this is where they train people to aim at center mass and as Ron just told you, they don't miss. Don't screw around with their stuff. Oh, and if you see a Latino guy running past with a bunch of these guys, try not to stare. President Santos tends to jog here on Thursdays."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Good morning, everyone!" Josh said, shaking his head to get rid of the vision of an Asian girl dressed in a wine barrel, tube socks, and a beret in the back of his class. On her it looked good, though. Weird. She disappeared after a few minutes.

"Today we'll watch portions of President Obama's State of the Union and play State of the Union Bingo while you finish up the speeches that are due today and you have undoubtedly forgotten about until right this moment. Then we'll hear your speeches and probably stop playing State of the Union Bingo by then. But it's pretty fun--" if you were a policy nerd like Josh anyway, "--and when you're old enough to go into bars without getting me arrested for abetting a minor, I'll teach you the drinking game part."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

"Good morning, everyone," Josh said, taking a big gulp from his coffee mug. "Among his many other Constitutional duties, a president must present a State of the Union address to Congress every year. George Washington and John Adams delivered speeches to Congress. Thomas Jefferson abolished that practice because he thought it was too reminiscent of the king's Speech From the Throne. The State of the Union then became a written report that was delivered and read by a clerk until 1913, when Woodrow Wilson reinstated the 'standing before Congress and talking to them' thing. Over the past century, the speech has evolved from the President talking to the Congress to the President talking to the people of the United States with Congress acting as ovation-having props."

Josh shrugged. "I don't really see a problem with that. The State of the Union is the single most important speech the President gives every year and his speechwriters begin working on it months and months in advance. Now I'm not gonna make yours be that in depth, but you will have to give a speech next week. In it you must touch on three domestic policy issues, one foreign policy issue and bring in two human props who you will use to make your points about your amazing fake policy initiatives, like this--"

He pointed to a random male. "Skippy over there was working at Moobyland for two dollars a week until the Josh Lyman is Amazing Minimum Wage Bill passed last year and now he has enough money to buy both food and drink. Cue the standing ovation from my political allies in the Congress and the Republicans looking vaguely constipated. There are two things absolutely guaranteed to get the entire chamber standing up: announcing that the State of the Union is 'good', even if that's not remotely true, and praising our military. Everything else is up for debate." He frowned. "Except maybe talking about the World War II generation. No one wants to piss off old people."

He clapped his hands together. "Okay. Get on the computers and start coming up with some policies your hypothetical government would like to promote in the next year and some classmates to bribe into being your plot points."

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

Josh was dressed in the winter uniform for bureaucrats in Washington--dark suit, taupe trenchcoat--as he stood on the lawn of Mount Vernon, because who didn't love a good field trip, even in January? He took a sip of his coffee (thanks, Gert!) as he let his students wander around for a bit, exploring the grounds of the home of the first American president (or at least the first in any dimension he'd ever heard of).

Finally he gestured for them all to come back around. "Welcome to Mount Vernon," he said, "the home of George Washington, the first president of the United States, at least in all dimensions that I'm aware of." He passed out copies of the Articles of Confederation and the Constitution "Before you explore the house an outbuildings, give these a quick glance. How much power does a president have now, compared to what he'd been given in the Articles of Confederation? Bear in mind that the US had just broken off from a fair micromanage-y dictatorship, which colored the way they looked at things. Then you get to wander around and find the answer to this question for me: how much power did Washington have in comparison to the modern presidency?"

professor-lyman.livejournal.com

Josh wasn't in the classroom when it was time to begin. It wasn't because it was the first class of the day, either--he'd been up since 6 because he was a weirdo that way. No, he wanted to make an impression.

He'd called in a few favors (okay, a lot of favors) and instead of Josh entering the room, two Marine sentries came in, immaculately dressed in their dress uniforms, and stood at attention. They were immediately followed by five men in suits and serious expressions with very obvious earpieces in their ears. They glanced at each student, assessing them for danger, and then spread out around the room.

Finally, a familiar fanfare (at least if you were American) began playing and Josh strode into the room, waving like he was expecting to greet hundreds of onlookers. He then proceeded to walk around and shake the hands of each student individually, pausing to learn each of their names, before heading to his desk.

The Marines and Secret Service agents left.

"Wasn't that great?" Josh asked bouncily. "I've always wanted to do that. Anyway, I'm Josh Lyman, this is a class on the presidency and if you're in the wrong place, stand up so we can all make fun of you."

He wasn't really expecting anyone to do that.

"The presidency, or executive branch if you want to get fancy about it, is one of three alledgedly equal branches of the US federal government," he said. "But it's also the only one with its own theme music so that makes it better than everyone else. We'll get into the details about how much better it is later in the year, and we'll get some special guests if I can swing it, but for now, let's do the introduction thing so I can immediately forget all of your names again. I'll start. I'm Josh Lyman. I was the deputy chief of staff during most of the Bartlet administration, then became CoS for the first part of the Santos administration before coming here to mold you young people into not being complete idiots. My favorite president, other than the ones I worked for, is Thomas Jefferson, and if I could have a theme song, I'd pick ~~meta for~~ Shaft because that's some great music."

He pointed at some poor student. "Now you. Name, grade if you haven't been a chief of staff for a president, favorite president or leader of whatever dimension you come from, and what you'd pick if someone played theme music before you walked into a room."

He leaned back against his desk. "And I need an assistant for this class if anyone's interested. I might find you some theme music too."

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