Fandom High School

"Hello," Vala greeted them. On each desk were a blue book, a number two pencil, and a pen. "First, I'd like to thank you all very much for being such an attentive and open-minded class. The class discussions have been very enlightening for me, and hopefully for you as well. Unfortunately, that doesn't get you out of having to take a measurable final examination of some kind."

She wrote three questions on the board:

1. Compare and contrast two religions that we've studied. How are they alike, how do they differ, which one appeals to you more on a personal level, and why?

2. What do you look for in a religion? What do you think others hope to gain from their belief?

3. If you could lead a religion, what kind of objects would you make sacred? Why?

"Credit will be given to the best two answers out of three questions answered. I'm looking for coherency and logic in support of your arguments as well--I want you to think, not just parrot back to me. Also, if I catch you cheating, you'll be staked outside naked and decorated like a Christmas tree. Good luck!"

"Good morning! Now, those of you who were paying attention may have noticed that I forgot to have you give the oral presentations about living as a member of the religion for a week. Some of you may not have done the assignment at all due to the plague and the fact that I forgot about it for a couple of weeks afterward."

"However, that should not stop you from giving an oral presentation! If you did the assignment, I want to hear how it went. If it didn't, either make something up or deliver a speech about what you found out about the religion in preparation for living as a member for the week, or give a presentation as if you were a member--or leader--of that religion. What would you say to bring people into the religion or convert them from the religion they've already got? Why is yours better?"

"I guess what I really want to get going is a debate. Find someone and try to proselytize."

"Good morning, everyone," Vala greeted them from on top of her desk and sipped from a large cup of coffee, strangely quiet. "I'm glad to see that you made it through last week. In memory of Bart Allen and noting that many of you were extremely sick, I'd like to take it easy today. I've left some handouts about how several different religions and cultures address the issue of death. For next week, I'd like you to write a five page paper detailing the differences between them, if a religion's way of dealing with it appeals to you or offends your sensibilities, and if there is anything you would think would bring comfort to those mourning."

"On that note, I'd also like to say a brief thank you to Karal, who organized such a moving ceremony for a fellow student. You went above and beyond the call of duty."

"Now," she said, finally noticing something odd about some of the students if they were there, "would someone please tell me what's going on with you guys now?"

"Good morning, my class!" Vala greeted them cheerfully as they entered. Possibly waaaaay too cheerfully. No, she wasn't going to explain that either. In any event, there was a large jar of applesauce on Sam's desk for him. "First, a huge thank you to my able assistant who I am told did a wonderful job explaining paganism. However, if you have any questions about it, I'll be happy to answer them. Due to my unavoidable absence last week, you missed out on the midterm, which will be more of a practical--mostly because I don't feel like grading tests this weekend--and take place over the course of this week."

"Your assignment is to choose one of the religions we've studied so far--not your own--and immerse yourselves in it for the week. Customs, beliefs, style of dress if that makes a difference, religious practices, all of it. I want you to become a member of that faith. And then I want you to be prepared to give an oral presentation on your experiences next week, so we can all learn from what you learned. Isn't cooperation fun?" Again with the big grin.

"So, please sign in and choose your religion, then come up with a plan of att--er, action--for the week."

"Good morning. I hope you all enjoyed your weekend with your parents, or have plans to go out drinking immediately after your last class today is finished to blot out the memories," Vala said as she passed out handouts. "Today's class is on Islam, and anyone who doesn't feel capable of having a calm, rational conversation on the topic is free to go. I know that there is a large anti-Muslim sentiment running rampant in this country right now, but I won't tolerate it in my classroom."

She waited until anyone who was going to leave did, then continued. "As I was saying, Islam is one of the three major world religions on this planet, and deserving of quite a bit of respect. As with Christianity and Judaism, there is a book--called the Qur'an--that forms the basis for the religion, and provides a guide for living a traditional Muslim life."

"The important prophet to know about is Muhammad, who is seen as restoring the world to the uncorrupted faith and religion of Abraham, the founder of Judaism, as you'll remember. The primary duties of both sects of Islam are called the Five Pillars of Islam, although some followers of the religion believe there are eight duties instead."

"Because we have already covered dietary laws under Judaism, today your project will be to find Mecca without benefit of a GPS--I'm told it's east of here. There are rugs provided for you, and I would like you to spend today in silent contemplation, for at least a few minutes, in whatever language or religious basis you prefer. Aren't you happy we're not part of a public school?"

"Well," Vala said as everyone was seated, trying not to look like she'd obviously been listening to the radio over the weekend, "we were supposed to continue on in our exploration of the religions of this planet, but instead of highlighting the differences, I think today will be about exploring one of their similarities--the idea of forgiveness, for those who truly repent for something they've done wrong, whether it has hurt anyone or not."

"The methods may vary--some fast and ask repentance for everything in one shot, others involve going to a small booth and reporting everything done since the last report, others involve writing the sin down and sending it off into the ether, others involve asking forgiveness of the person who has been wronged. Some also involve sacrifices, but I'm told that is no longer socially acceptible on this planet. What is important, however, is that the message is the same--if you're sorry for what you have done, and wish to do better, you can acknowledge what you've done wrong and prove by your actions that this is true, and you will be forgiven."

"So. I'm going to leave you to it. There are various methods available, and whether or not you choose to repent is up to you, since that's none of my business and is between you and your supreme being of choice. Whenever you're ready, you can use that method, or just leave the room when you're finished."

As the students entered the Danger Room Shop, as they'd been handwavily instructed to do, they would find a setting that looking very, very much like a desert.

There was a reason for that.

( And lo, there was a lecture )

Vala cleared her throat, "I believe I've bored you all enough for one day. There are history books to study, I've brought some translations of services and of the Torah and Talmud, and there is also some food, if you're hungry. Those of you who are more enterprising may feel free to attempt to make a kosher dish," she fiddled with the controls until they were in a well-appointed kitchen, with dishes and implements well-marked for their convenience. Have fun, and enjoy the new year, which was last week. Next Friday and Saturday are the holiest days of the Jewish year, called Yom Kippur--or the Day of Atonement--which involves a twenty-four hour fast while you atone for your sins, so you should be glad it's only a once a year thing."

[ooc: OCD up in a few!]

As the students entered, Vala was perched on top of her desk (yes, she had a desk!), and looking over her notes and class lists. Once they were seated, she began,

"Good morning, everyone. For those of you who don't know me already, my name is Vala Mal Doran. Please feel free to call me Vala, or Professor Mal Doran if that makes you more comfortable."

"This class is about different religions," she explained, "and the first half of the class will focus on strictly the Earthen religions. The second half will be broader in scope and expand our study to inter-planetary religions. The only thing I ask--in light of the fact that more bloody wars have been fought over religion than anything else in human history--is that you have respect for the teachings of the guest speakers, and of the other students in this class. You don't have to agree, and I don't expect you to convert to their religion, but I won't tolerate any insults or baiting on the subject. With any luck, we'll all come out of this with a better understanding of religion."

"Today's class will be relatively simple--introduce yourselves, explain why you're taking this class, and explain your religion in broad language, if you have one. If you don't, explain why you don't. There are no penalties for not having one, by the way."

"As far as food and drink are concerned," she added, "I don't make enough money to feed you all every week, but you should bring whatever you want that you've provided for yourself."

She pointed to a student at random. "Okay, go ahead."