Fandom High School

"Sorry for missing class last week," Summer said, from the front of the classroom sim in the Danger Shop, "but, well, I was kind of a squirrel. Which, if you haven't already personally had experience with it before, is something that can happen around here, by the way, and something I figured might not be a bad topic of discussion for our class as a whole. Generally, with a few exceptions, I'm sure, handling when you or a friend turns into an animal isn't a Life Skill for most people have to deal with, but around here? Eventually, it probably will be, so let's talk about it.

"For the most part," Summer continued, "there's never really been an established rhyme or reason why it happens, when it happens, or how frequently. A good deal of it seems entirely random and without logic, a fact that has driven many an intellectual," or, well, just the one , that she could think of, "crazy. Sometimes, it happens in waves, where it's a bunch of people that it happens to at the same time, although no discerning connection between those people can really be made. Sometimes, it's just a few people. Sometimes, it's even just one person and no one else. Like I said, random. Unpredictable. But just because you can't predict something doesn't mean you can't be prepared."

From there, she pushed off the desk she was leaning on to go to the board to start jotting down points as she went through them: types of animals (any, really), the varying levels in which people seemed to retain their own personalities and thoughts through the process, the average length of a transformation, and, most importantly, the sometimes awkward nature of when you change back. "Hopefully," she said to confirm this fact, "you'll have changed in the company of someone you trust, who will keep you out of public spaces to avoid a lot of embarrassment, but if not, it's always good to have a plan in mind. I have a lockdown procedure I usually initiate once I turn into a squirrel, that keeps me safe from venturing out and catching myself in an awkward situation, but, then again, I do also have the added hurdle of the squirrels on this island," well, one squirrel in particular, but she wouldn't say names, "are terrible. I also have a few spots around the island where I have emergency clothes stores, just in case. Having some sort of emergency post-transformation kit on hand is never a bad idea, either."

She extrapolated a little further on that, and a few other finer points, before turning to the class.

"So," she said, "now that we have the basics laid down, any questions? Other ideas to better prepare yourself for when you or a friend turns into an animal? What about your own experiences, with turning into an animal or taking care of a friend who has? I know for a fact some of you have stories on this one, so let's just really open it up to a conversation and see where it leads us, especially if you have any theories or thoughts on why this might happen in the first place, and if you think it's inevitable or maybe there's a way to stop it. Let's get philosophical all up in here, sure, why not? Who wants to start?"

"Today," Summer began class, as usual, in front of the classroom sim in the danger shop, although a little space was cleared off to the side, so you knew that was probably going to play into things a little bit later, "we're going to talk about something that, like a lot of these things, will be very useful to some of you and not useful at all to some others, but is a topic that is very near and dear to my heart," especially these past few weeks!, "and that's dealing with hangovers, and the requisite lesson about alcohol abuse and the dangers therein, because y'all are teenagers at a boarding school on an island with a bar with a very liberal drinking age policy, so, you know....no delusions there."

Although the kids these days seemed way less into partying that she'd been at their age, really. A part of her was almost hoping this class would serve as inspiration, but, of course, she, a responsible adult, wasn't going to say that.

"So we're going to talk about some of the effects that alcohol can have on your body and, more importantly, ways to help prevent a hangover the next morning if you know you're going to get wrecked anyway, and talk about some myths surrounding hangover 'cures' and what really works and what doesn't.

"And," she then added, "since it's generally frowned upon to give students a bunch of alcohol first thing in the morning on a Monday, we've got a few activities that are said to help simulate some of what it feels like to be under the influence of alcohol to give you some perspective on how it impairs you, but we'll get to that in a second. First, the technical stuff..."

While Summer was starting to feel a little better (okay, no, actually, a lot better, but, you know, low bar) than she had last week, there were still a lot of topics that could be helpful for this class that she was still a little sore about and might make her go right back to feeling terrible. However, she'd also had some pretty big party-planning blinders on since Wednesday, and that also made it a little difficult for her to really think of a good next lesson. Until she realized that therein she found her solution.

"Parties," she announced at the front of the danger shop classroom sim, proudly and with a wistful fondness for the one thing that had very rarely ever let her down. "And party planning. For some people, it comes natural, for others, it can be a real slog, but being able to whip up a party in, oh, I don't know, let's just say five days or less, is definitely a skill that can be learned and honed and will always come easier with practice. I, for one, have always been a big advocate for partying, even back when I was your age, I threw some real bangers at this school, it was kind of what I was known for, so today, we're going to talk parties, how to throw them, what they're for, and then you're all going to get together and see what you can do about planning your own party....together!"

That's right, folks. When in doubt, pick something topical and then make it a group activity, and your work here was done!

Once again, the class was in the classroom module for the danger shop, and, once again, they had a guest! So hopefully, everyone would be on their best behavior, especially considering the subject matter.

Especially consider the week.

"Tomorrow," Summer started, "is, of course, Valentine's Day, and while I could easily spend a whole lesson…hell, even a whole unit...on the commercialization and bullshitization of most holidays, especially this particular one, it would not be very useful or helpful to the class, and the only life skill it would likely tie into is a healthy distaste for capitalism. Instead, we are going to focus on the romantic nature of the holiday, and what it usually entails, and so, that's right, folks, we're doing the sex ed class.

"And while I do have plenty of experience in this topic," Summer, don't tell that to your students, "I am not, categorically speaking, an expert or a professional." Unless OnlyFans counted. "But luckily, we do have a professional expert on this topic here on our very own island. And so, just like we did with Dr. Halstead last week, I'm going to turn the class over to our very own sex shop proprietress and, if I'm not mistaken, former Sex Ed instructor here at the school, Miss Irene Adler. Irene?"

Irene graced the class with a bright smile and a teensy, fluttered little wave. "Morning, my friends. If we've not met before, it's nice to do so now! And yes, Summer is correct – I'm a bit of an expert in this particular field, and the very first thing I want to reassure you all: there's no such thing as a stupid question, and no shame in not knowing something. Sex is a very tricky, fluid thing, and it means a lot of different things to different people. It's not, despite what Fox News might have you think, as simple as shoving Tab A into Slot B, believe it or not."

And with that, Irene actually pulled out a few incredibly detailed diagrams, and carefully went over the very basics of how some people have a this, some people have a that, very occasionally some people have both, and that sometimes it's not appropriate to acknowledge what they have at all.

"But," Irene concluded, because she had brought goodies other than the diagrams, "paramount to all of this is being safe."

And thus, she had brought party favors.

Summer started class that week without much preamble, leaning on the desk in front of the danger shop classroom as usual, but this time, with a big TV screen next to her, so there was a good chance everyone could figure out what today's lesson would entail!

"Personal hygiene," she said. "Not everyone's favorite topic, but an important one, especially when you've got people in your class from all walks of life, some of which didn't always involve the convenience of water being piped directly into your house for hygiene purposes. Now, obviously, personal hygiene is also very much that: personal, so we're going to politely try to keep it that way. I have a few sheets with tips and good practices to follow, and I found a few videos in the archives to watch that'll go over some of it. If there's any questions, we'll go over them after the video, although if you'd rather ask them in private, I'll stick around after class to do so. I'd like for you all to feel comfortable enough to be open in this classroom, but I know it doesn't always work like that.

"I did, however," she added, "bring snacks."

Don't worry, guys. No jello. More like just popcorn and theater candy. And juice boxes. Because Summer's humor was weird.

The danger shop classroom was very kitchen specific that morning, so there a pretty good chance you could figure out what they were covering in class this week.

"Cooking!"

(Sorry, Vi).

"Well," Summer amended, "some very basic things and kitchen safety. So those of you who are more familiar with working in a kitchen, some of this might seem pretty simple, but it could be useful for those of you who aren't. We have to bear with a lot of different skill levels in this class, so there might be a few breezy classes for a couple of you. But today we're going to focus on a pretty easy staple that you can make whether you're on a budget or have otherwise limited resources, and that's boiling water and making pasta. In addition to that, we're going to go over basic kitchen safety tips, everything from proper knife use and maintenance, to food that may or may not be expired, to what to do in the case of a kitchen fire. Let's actually start with those things, and then we'll move onto the actual cooking."

Or, well, boiling water and putting noodles into it, but that....technically counts! Everyone has to start somewhere!

Class that morning (and probably most mornings) was being held in the Danger Shop, although it was set up to look just like any other classroom in the school, because that would never not be funny to Summer. Plus, it never hurt to keep some of the students who were in the know about the DS on their toes a little, and it never hurt, even with a first introductory class, to have that little extra cushion of safety just in case anything did get really weird.

Summer herself was leaning on the front of the desk at the front of the classroom, looking over the gathered students, faces both familiar and not-so-much, with a faint smirk on her face. "Welcome," she said," to the first class on the first day of a new semester, or, as I like to call it, probably way too early to ever be dealing with one of my classes, but they seem to want to put it right out there and out of the way right out the gate. This time around, we're going to be going over Life Skills, which is an extremely broad topic that can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people, and we're going to somehow try and tap into all those things this semester with this class.

"For those of you who don't know," she continued, pressing a hand to her chest, "my name is Summer, I'm going to be your teacher for this class, and I hope my experiences with life in general can translate into some helpful skills for you all to learn. And for those of you who don't know, the first week of classes are usually just for introductions, and we are not going to stray from that trend, especially since none of you are overly sick of them yet. Not only that, but in this class, it'll also be kind of helpful, so I can know where everyone is, and whether or not I'll be steering this class more toward...like...changing tires and accounting, or, like...how to survive in a hellish post-apocalyptic landscape or defuse a bomb before you're blown to smithereens.

"Hopefully," she flashed her eyes around the room to gauge general reactions to that range of possibilities, "we'll find a good balance of all of it. But that's mostly what today is going to be for: going around, introducing yourself, and letting me know where you're from, what you like to do, what you're hoping to get out of this class, if there's anything in particular you'd like to learn or that you think you're already really good at, that kind of thing, just so I know where everyone's currently at.

"And then," said Summer, with a faint grin as she pushed up from the desk and moved around it, to pull a box out from behind it and set it on the desk with a very light and delicate thunk; reaching in, she pulled out a small, basic cell phone, "we're talking phones. If you have one, great. If you don't? Oh, boy, are we in for it today!"