http://professor-lyman.livejournal.com/ (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
professor-lyman.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2014-01-30 11:49 am
professor-lyman.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2014-01-30 11:49 am
Entry tags:
Plus We Have a Motorcade [Thursday, January 30, 2014, 1st period]
"Good morning, everyone!" Josh said, shaking his head to get rid of the vision of an Asian girl dressed in a wine barrel, tube socks, and a beret in the back of his class. On her it looked good, though. Weird. She disappeared after a few minutes.
"Today we'll watch portions of President Obama's State of the Union and play State of the Union Bingo while you finish up the speeches that are due today and you have undoubtedly forgotten about until right this moment. Then we'll hear your speeches and probably stop playing State of the Union Bingo by then. But it's pretty fun--" if you were a policy nerd like Josh anyway, "--and when you're old enough to go into bars without getting me arrested for abetting a minor, I'll teach you the drinking game part."
"Today we'll watch portions of President Obama's State of the Union and play State of the Union Bingo while you finish up the speeches that are due today and you have undoubtedly forgotten about until right this moment. Then we'll hear your speeches and probably stop playing State of the Union Bingo by then. But it's pretty fun--" if you were a policy nerd like Josh anyway, "--and when you're old enough to go into bars without getting me arrested for abetting a minor, I'll teach you the drinking game part."
Sign in [1/30]
Re: Sign in [1/30]
Re: Sign in [1/30]
Re: Sign in [1/30]
Re: Sign in [1/30]
Watch the State of the Union!
Re: Watch the State of the Union!
And so, while ostensibly getting bingo, she was going to scribble down phrases she could crib from the speech itself.
Give your Speech!
Re: Give your Speech!
"My fellow Americans," she began, because that was how the gentleman on videotape had started. From there, she winged it. Her speech focused on a few core issues, such as the need to stop medical experimentation, the importance of educating those in retirement, and several name-drops of Medicaid.
She wasn't sure who or what Medicaid was, or whether it was good or bad, but she stressed the importance of remembering that Medicaid was one of her administration's top priorities, and promising to keep a watch over it.
She waxed poetic on the troubles of those whose unions were immigrating to other cities, having grasped that both "unions" and "immigration" were somehow important, and hoped that her
big sibmentor Raven wouldn't mind that she pointed in her direction when talking about Melissa Holloway, a girl whose union had left town, and of course something something Medicaid.Under her plan, people like Professor Lyman would have a path to citizenship to enjoy the great spirit of this wonderful and unique country. In closing, social security, and Medicaid. Always Medicaid.
Re: Give your Speech!
"Ladies and gentlemen," he began. "Boys and girls! Children of all ages! ...No, that's not how these generally start. But it sure fits, doesn't it? Me, here, standing in front of you? I'm going to do my song and dance, and you're going to write endless articles and do endless interviews about what I say, but come tomorrow? Naaah. You, the legislators of our country, are going to say 'well, that was an entertaining show', and you're going to go right back to your important \ business of sitting on your behinds, twiddling your thumbs, and ignoring your president. Tonight's a circus."
He looked around the room, catching the eyes of each member of the class in turn. "Well, I won't stand for that. The American People won't stand for that! I firmly believe that this great nation, founded on the principles of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, can actually live up to those ideals, if we only try! I firmly believe that we are one of the best countries on the planet -- probably in the top five -- but we ought to be number one! I firmly believe that, once we merge with Canada and Mexico, the new government thus formed will be a shining beacon guiding humanity forward into the stars! (Because that’s what happens.) And I firmly believe that these truths are self-evident: that all sentient beings are endowed with inherent, inalienable rights, and that among those are the right to dignity and respect, the right to a roof over their heads and food in their bellies, the right to shoes and clothing that aren’t falling apart, the right to education and health care, the right to a system of laws and law enforcement officers that works for them instead of against them, the right to electricity, and water, and heat, the right to access the television, telephone, and intranet, which for some reason we’re treating as being separate things, and the right to equal treatment regardless of species, race, ethnicity, gender, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, creed, political affiliation, disability, age, or anything else!”
“And yet, here we are, in this great nation, and people are still starving in the streets. People are working two or three jobs and still can’t make ends meet. My fellow Americans, I am hereby declaring the War on Poverty over!” He paused for effect.
“... We lost. It’s time for a new direction. And to that end, I am introducing a new initiative, which I am calling Restoring Our Belief In the Nation through the Holistic Obsolescence Of Destitution.” The floating screen stopped showing its montage of images and displayed the program’s name instead. “Check out those capital letters. We’re going to start with the small, easy things first -- doubling the minimum wage, expanding Medicaid and Medicare to cover every American, extending unemployment benefits indefinitely, reviving the Works Progress Administration -- and we’ll move on to larger programs from there. This is going to be a holistic approach, with everything on the table. There will be committees studying the issues, and opportunities for every American to contribute ideas, or their time and energy. And don’t worry, deficit hawks, this will all be paid for with small...ish increases in the top tax brackets for individuals and corporations.”
Re: Give your Speech!
From there, the screen began showing charts and graphs and tables of figures, as Joker went into some of the details of his plans. After a little of that, he paused. “Eh. I’ve got, like twenty minutes of material here, but most of it’s boring, and other people need a turn.” He gave Josh a shrug. “Citations and footnotes and everything. I can email it to you? I’ll just skip to the end.”
He cleared his throat, and scrolled the text he was reading from almost all the way to the bottom. “Now, you’re all going to be thinking that this is too ambitious. Impossible. Ludicrous, even. And maybe you’re right. But the alternative is stagnation, is the same old problems playing out year after year, decade after decade, and century after century. Some of you are probably offended -- horrified, even -- at the idea of taxing the rich in order to make this country better. To you, I say: this country was founded on four things. First, our righteous idealism -- our notions of basic personal rights, and liberty, and justice. Second, hard work and the sweat of our brows -- our industry and determination. Thirdly, our celebrated Yankee ingenuity -- science and technology beyond compare, and the thirst for knowledge. And finally, theft. Blatant. Outright. Theft. Theft of the land we’re standing on. Theft of the labor and the selfhood of the workers we brought from foreign lands. Theft of the basic rights and dignity of everyone who was stepped on in the name of progress. And always, always, theft of what little the have-nots had, by those who already had everything. My fellow Americans, isn’t it time they gave something back?”
Oh, yeah. Anyone who thought he got the name “Joker” from all the jokes, think again. It’s a tongue-in-cheek reference to him getting way too frikking serious about things.
Talk to Josh and Gert!
OOC