Detention, Depths of the Castle, Wednesday

[bigdamnprisoner.livejournal.com]

The good news for everyone in detention was that there wasn't any sign of singing going on on the island today, so everyone could be spared from any further embarrassing admissions that they'd rather not have made.

The bad news was for everyone in detention was, well, they were all still in detention. But surely, it was getting easier to deal with over time?

The Joy of Nonmagical Cooking, Wednesday, Period One

[hiddenkilt.livejournal.com]

Priestly -- that'd be Mr. Priestly to you students -- stood at the front of the classroom, wearing a neatly starched and pressed white apron over his equally neatly starched and pressed suit. He waited with his arms folded over his chest, watching as the students arrived, and at the precise time that class was intended to start, he cleared his throat.

"Good morning, class. I hope you all had a very fine day yesterday, and avoided too much frivolity with the . . . singing . . . and all." Dammit, he'd had that line rehearsed perfectly, earlier. "Today, we're going to be making something nice and simple: a swordfish salad with orange vinaigrette. You'll find the recipe and ingredients at your work station, as usual. You'll also find some nice guides to formal table setting, which brings us to our main focus for today: presentation.

( So this actually got a little long. )

[ooc: violets v. arsenic detail totally and unabashedly stolen from The Adventures of Brisco County Junior. Priestly absolutely does not endorse the poisoning of one's dinner guests, unless of course, that dinner guest is our esteemed Ms. Dolores Umbridge.]

Wednesday Morning Announcements!

[umbitch.livejournal.com]

This morning, there would be no singing. Umbridge had talked to herself several times this morning just to make sure those urges were well and gone. And with that done, she came onto the intercom and sounded about as crazy as ever.

"Good morning, children!" she chirped, giggling. "This is your High Inquisitor bringing you your daily announcements. I'm so glad to hear of the classes progressing so well. You all are learning so much and soon enough, you'll be smarter than even me."

She giggled again.

"That's probably not true but you can definitely aspire. I just have a few reminders for you this morning. Should you find anyone misbehaving, please report them immediately to your administration. Your Chief of Security will be more than happy to find these rule breakers and make sure they are duly punished. She won't hurt them...much."

Another hysterical giggle.

"And for those of you in detention, I am still very disappointed in all of you. You are all there for a reason and if I weren't so utterly busy with running the island, I would make you all write lines. But, since I am so busy making sure your existences continue on, that won't be possible. Instead, perhaps I'll...cut you down to one meal? What about turning the heat up to dangerous levels? Or I could even put on a show of my own..."

Umbridge trailed off and waited.

"Yes, I think that might be a good thing to do if misbehavior continues. How would you all like to watch your former principal dance while I put her under the Crucio curse? You will see this if you continue to act out. Do the right thing and save your former principal's life. Thank you and have a great day!"

The intercom clicked off and the announcements ended.

Planning And Execution: From Battlefield To Boardroom (Weds, Period 4)

[archparakeet.livejournal.com]

"So in war, the way is to avoid what is strong and strike at what is weak." Warren's hands were in fists at his side as he paced in front of his class, wings draped behind him like a cloak so that metallic feathers dragged along the floor. "Sun Tzu, The Art of War. If you haven't got a copy, I strongly urge you to borrow it from the library. Most of our lessons this summer have been taken from the pages of his book, and I have little doubt that I'll be referring to it again in the future."

He paced a little more, and then stopped, turned to his students, and gave a smile that was practically predatory, calm though it was.

( Every enemy has a weak point. )

[Open!]

Boot Camp 101: Falling in Line and Loving It, Wednesday, Period 2, Week 4

[nokitestringnow.livejournal.com]

Kennedy's class wasn't fun and games. Anyone who read the title and expected a cakewalk-- well, tough luck for them. By now, four weeks into the session, everybody ought to know the routine: show up in appropriate workout attire, get to class on time, line up and wait for instructions. By now nobody should be surprised to show up and find Kennedy, thumbs tucked behind her belt buckle and stern expression set on her face, standing at the front of whatever setup she had in store for them this week.

Today that was a climbing wall.

"This is the last week of Phase One," she said as she paced back and forth along the line with measured strides, taking the time to look each student in the face for several seconds as she did. (The usual reason: she wanted you all to know she was watching you.) "Next week we start on field training, so you better hope your conditioning is up to standards."

She pointed toward various piles of equipment: helmets, harnesses, ropes, carabiners, rosin bags and gloves. "Gear up, and scale the wall-- cut the chatter," she added preemptively, as if she didn't remind them every week that talking amongst themselves was a thing that would get them yelled at. "Get to it."

Wednesday: Study Hall

[toomanyofme.livejournal.com]

The ocelots were getting restless. They yowled in complaint in their cage, occasionally snapping at each other when one crawled over the other.

The Madri seemed not to care. They merely took their positions around the room and kept an eye open for troublemakers.

For Hire; Wednesday, Fourth Period [ 07/25 ].

[darkestsamus.livejournal.com]

"Today," Deadpool started class with a somewhat disturbing level of glee in his voice, and there was about to be a gratutious amount of finger waggling going on in his upcoming display of teacherly prowess, "we're talking about one of my favorite topics, crushing your enemies between your little for hire fingers like peanuts or acorns or that goopy Gak stuff. You remember Gak? I think there's still Gak in my carpet, and that was the nineties..."

From the corner of the room where she was reclined with her feet up on a desk, Samus cleared her throat.

"Right," Deadpool focused, "class. Crushing your opponents. As mercs and hunters, you get to do a lot of that, and the better you do, the more people want to hire you. There are all sorts of ways to crush your enemies. Personally, I find that stabbing them enough works. Or letting their own hubris blow them up on their fancy islands. Their fancy, fancy islands. And Samus, here, she just goes and blows up planets."

Samus nodded, lifting up her gunarm, which glowed blue with the buzz of potential world annihilation and xenocide; some things didn't change, whether you were corrupted by Phazon overload or not.

"She's so cute," Deadpool cooed with admiration. "So now it's your turn. Let's just say we're about to hire you to go out and destroy various and sundry rebels and freedom fighters and freedom fries and freedom what-have-yous. How are you going to do it? Stabbing, blowing up island, and blowing up planets is already taken, too. Come up with something original, geez."

[[ ocd on the way up! ]]