Cooking 101, Tuesday, Period 1

[glacial_queen]

"It's time for quesadillas!" Karla said when the class came in. "I was gonna go with tacos, but those seemed a little too easy--" because they'd had such a great track record with stuff so far, yup "--and quesadillas are the next best thing. If you've never had a quesadilla before, they're pretty simple: take a tortilla, fill it with chicken, cheese, veggies, and spices, then cook it in a pan for about five minutes. Then, voila! They're done and you have a delicious lunch to stick into your face."

Which, as everybody knew, was the important bit.

"So, the first thing we do is cut up the ingredients," Karla said, pulling down a cutting board. "First, we're gonna cut up our chicken breast. I got us boneless, skinless chicken breast because otherwise we would have spent all our time deboning and skinning a chicken and we don't have time for that. So, you get your chicken out and you season it. Salt, pepper, onion powder, garlic salt..." Karla merrily oversalted the chicken, talking the entire time. "Then you cut it into strips. I like to cut it into strips on the diagonal, then cut those strips in half." Whatever else she did, Karla was able to wield a knife with terrifying efficiency, getting the chicken sliced into neat, even strips in seconds. "Then we set the chicken aside and wash out hands, because salmonella poisoning is terrible."

"Now we do the same with the veggies. Wash, peel, and then slice." Karla washed the bell peppers and cilantro, which was good, and the onions which was less good, and then put both onto the same cutting board she'd cut the chicken on and that was terrible. "Once those are sliced, we add everything to the tortillas," she said, setting out two soft tortillas. "This one is the bottom, so we put the chicken and veggies onto it," she said, adding the raw chicken and the vegetables to one of the tortillas. "Then sprinkle a lot of cheese on it--" her tortilla was practically overflowing by this point, "and then put the second tortilla on top of it. Then put it into the pan."

Half the cheese and some of the chicken fell out of Karla's tortilla before she reached the pan, and the rest flopped in without a sound. "Ooops! You're supposed to preheat the pan with oil in it," she said, turning it on. "There's oil there, by I forgot to turn it on. Oh well. We'll just add another minute to the cooking time."

Six minutes passed and then Karla took a spatula to flip out the quesadilla onto a plate. It was still barely warm, the cheese hadn't even melted, and the bottom was almost transparent with absorbed oil. Karla still cut it up, merrily chatting away as she cut it into six even pieces. "And then you take a bite--"

She did. And almost immediately paled, reaching for a paper towel to spit into. "Ugh, the chicken's still raw," she said, cranking up the heat and then adding more oil to the now-hot pan. It spat and hissed and Karla had to jerk her hand away. "Okay, so we're gonna cook it for a little more than six minutes..." she said, and practically tossed the quesadilla back into the smoking pan. "...Probably because the pan was cold before."

And also because most people precooked the chicken.

"So let's get started with--"

The oil in the pan took that moment to go up in flames. "Okay, quick, it's just a little fire," Karla called. "We're just going to throw some water onto it and--"

And today's real lesson, kids, was not to throw water onto an oil fire.

Bad Ass Bitch Survival Guide; Tuesday, Second Period [09/25].

[died8yearsago]

There was another note on the classroom door, directing the students down to the gym, with another threat of the last one being a punching bag, but, truth be told, Rosa's plans involved everyone being equally punched. In a matter of speaking. She wasn't literally going to punch kids.

...well, maybe if they really deserved it.

Should they be worried about the mats being pulled out and covering the floor again? Probably not. All those baseball bats, though? Time would tell.

( A Totally Appropriate Subject for High School Students. )

"Alright, any questions?" Or, what she was expecting more of, objections? "Anyone have any other suggestions? Let's go, get this over with, so we can all get out of here."

Practical Ethics, Tuesday, Period 3

[jedigrammarians]

Everyone ready to read today? Good. Anakin has handouts. "This is a famous story from this planet called The Lady or the Tiger," he began. "Hopefully Dr. Aphra read it over the week like I told her to."

She was capable of doing assigned reading, Anakin. "Yeah, yeah, psycho royalty feeds people to overgrown tookas."

"Maybe feeding people to overgrown tookas," Anakin said. "The ending is ambiguous, and that's what our discussion today will be about: what do you think the princess advised her lover--the door with the beautiful woman behind it, or the one with the tiger so he could get eaten? And which would you choose, if you were in the same position?"

"It's pretty obvious, you don't build a whole tooka deathtrap, then let the guy go." Aphra had opinions, apparently. "There's some truly psychotic levels of jealousy involved here."

"Well, you could," Anakin said. "Otherwise it would just be people-eating day. There has to be at least the appearance of getting to live."

"Yeah, 'the appearance', not the reality." Yes, Aphra was using finger-quotes. You had great teachers.

You were so lucky, it was true. "So. Do you think it's people-eating day, or did her lover get lucky?"