Off The Grid: Laying Low for Beginners, Tuesday, Period Two

[uncertain_dume]

"Let me tell you about my day, yesterday."

Yes, the slightly dissheveled man who was standing at the front of the classroom, hair pulled back in a ponytail and an empty blaster holster strapped to his hip, was, in fact, your teacher for this class. If you were here to learn how to avoid notice, you'd come to the right place.

( Yesterday I went out to get a sandwich... )

[OOC: OCD is up and class is ready to go!]

Beat The Heat: Indoor Activities 101, Wednesday, Period 3

[geniuswithasmartphone]

Surprising absolutely no one who'd ever taken a class with him before, Hardison had sent messages for his students to meet him in the Danger Shop for class today. What they might not have expected for a class called 'Indoor Activities', was for the Danger Shop door to open up to a replica of Fandom's beach, all set up for a picnic. There were blankets spread over the sand, baskets overflowing with treats and snacks and drinks, and a volleyball net set up not that far away. The sand was soft and white, the ocean was blue and welcoming, and the sky played host to puffy clouds and a golden sun.

"Sup," Hardison said, giving a lazy wave from where he was lounging in a beach chair. "Welcome to Beat The Heat: Indoor Activities 101. C'mon in, settle down, help yourself to some snacks, let's get this class started, right?"

He waited until everyone had taken a seat on a blanket and helped themselves to snacks if they wanted before continuing his lecture. "So, it's gettin' on to summer, which means everyone's gonna be encouragin' you to go outside an' do stuff. Like somehow now that the weather's warmed up, all the fun things you did inside over the winter suddenly ain't good enough anymore. An', sure, you may be a little bit stir-crazy if the winter's been particularly bad, but runnin' around outside in the summer ain't the glorious, problem-free pastime everybody tries to pretend, either." While he was talking, the Danger Shop had been cranking up the heat, taking a scene that had been 'comfortably warm' up to 'sweltering.'

"There are lotsa reasons to hang indoors over the summer. It gets hot really quick," he said, wiping his forehead with his arm as sweat broke out at his hairline. "Summer brings out all sorts of bugs to bother you." Mosquitoes made an appearance now, darting around trying to bite. Swarms of midges circled, making it hard to open one's mouth without inhaling a few. Ants started marching their way across the blankets towards the food. "Sand might be pretty, but it's damn uncomfortable an' gets everywhere." No, he wasn't trying to hit on anybody Anakin, just complaining as the wind picked up and started blowing sand into their food and clothing. "An' then you gotta deal with all the other folks who had the same idea as you an' decided to go outside at the same time you did." Suddenly the beach was filled with other people, all laughing and yelling and running around kicking up yet more sand as they dashed by. Four guys started playing a game of volleyball and every few minutes the ball would go flying towards Hardison's students, not hitting anyone, but knocking into their food and drinks. "An' if it ain't too hot, it's too cold. Summer weather is mad changeable, yo." And the temperature, which had continued to climb far past comfortable levels, plummeted sharply. The sky darkened and the ocean roiled as fat drops of cold rain started falling onto their picnic.

And then the beach was gone, replaced by a comfortable living room. Damp clothes were instantly dry, bug bites had vanished, and once again there was food, no longer despoiled by bugs or sand. "Then you got your house," Hardison said, smiling. "Climate controlled, where all your stuff is. You got electricity, plumbin', refrigeration...any number of modern conveniences just waitin' for you to decide you wanna use 'em. Now, I ain't sayin' that the outdoors is all bad--" He was just implying it heavily "--but I am sayin' you got plenty of options to have fun inside, where you ain't gotta worry about everythin' we just experienced out on the beach."