Hitting Things With Big, Sharp Sticks; Friday, Third Period [07/19].

[sword_chocobro]

"Last week," Gladio said, "we talked about a lot of the basics of sword work, had some time to sort of play around with some different sizes and styles to get a feel for it, and also try a few standard moves and stances. Now, we're going to put some of that together with a few basic fighting techniques against each other.

"Now, we've got a really wide range of experience and skills in this class, so some of this is going to be really rudimentary for some of you guys, but I still want you to really focus on it and treat it like it's a new skill for the first time. A lot of times, when we're doing something often, we lose track of some of the mechanics on those little things that we believe to be second-nature by now. Really focusing on them is a good way to sharpen thing back up and fix any little bad habits that may have been developing in the meantime. And if you haven't done it in a while, it's a great way to bring those good habits back. And once I go over the instructions, I want you to find a partner and give it a try. We've an uneven number, so I'll be happy to jump in there myself. Try to find someone who matches closely to your own experience level, though. I've no doubt you more experienced swordsmen'll help out our newbies, but I don't want anyone feeling too overwhelmed, and I want this to be a collective learning experience, you know?

"So, today, we're going to learn about a simple overhead strike from above, the defensive tactic to counter it. Then, a counter to the counter, and then two different methods of a strike to perform if your opponent, instead of countering your initial attack, takes a defensive maneuver instead.

"We'll go over the techniques, practice some of the moves on your own as I lead you through them, and then partner up and try to recreate them, taking turns on who has the first attack. If you start to feel you've got it down pretty well, feel free to try other approaches if your sparring partner is comfortable with that, otherwise...practice makes perfect. It might be boring and repetitive, but it's helpful in building up muscles and muscle memory so that, in the moment of a real attack, you can think fast and let your body to most of the work on its own."

Kitchen Design According to Nancy Meyers; Friday, Fourth Period [07/19].

[died8yearsago]

Rosa sighed from the burden of teaching at the front of the classroom again and just jumped right into it.

"The kitchen in this week's movie is apparently one of the most copied kitchen in film, and you're about to see why. The countertop space alone, my god. Plus, it's Meyers at her best in taking an underutilized actually adult romantic comedy model and making it her absolute bitch. So we'll watch it, we'll talk about it, that's the whole point of the class."

That she still had to be teaching because of these two numbnuts. Whatever. She was definitely going to just ignore them and watch the movie.

Which would have also been her lesson plan if there had been more people in the class, too, but still.

Cultural Appropriation, Friday, July 19, 2024

[meepmeepmeep]

“I hope that everyone turned in their forms last week. I am sure there were no problems.”

Sam was sure of no such thing.

Beaker definitely hadn't turned in his forms, if that helped anyone. He was over at the control panel of the Danger Shop trying to add ambience to their class today! This would go great!

Sam sighed in Beaker’s general direction. Heavily. Pointedly.

“Today we shall be discussing something eminently appropriate and cultural,” Sam declared. “Cotillion!”

Did Sam really know what that was all about? Doubtful. But Sam thought he did and that was much more important.

"Meep meep meep meep meep meep meep," Beaker said. "Meep meep meep meep meep meep meep meep meep meep meep. Meep meep. Meep meep meep meep mee!"

As an explanation, that probably left something lacking for most people.

But there were costumes! Did that help? Probably not. But you could all look your very best if you so chose. And why wouldn’t you?

“As Beaker said, cotillion classes are to teach you to be respectful members of society.” Had Beaker actually said that? Did anyone here besides Sam understand him?

"Meep meep," Beaker said, holding up a lovely tea-length dress that was, inexplicably, sized for him, and then a pair of gloves and stockings.

The stockings were not optional.

“So, get dressed, students! And then we shall dance! And have etiquette lessons!” Didn’t that sound like so much fun? “Hurry, hurry!”

Did you expect the etiquette lessons to be given by talking silverware? If so, good for you. If not, well, surprise! The chickens were just there to assist.

Romancing For Dummies, Period 1

[doesdoctorstuff]

"Okay so, romance is really complicated," Navaan said once she got around to starting class, whenever that turned out to be. "Like, waaaaaay more complicated than sex. Even flang! So, like, the smart thing to do would be to stop worrying about romance and just go for sex, but most of you have that shiny virgin thing going on so that's probably a non-starter." She sighed. "Anyway, how do I know romance is more complicated than sex? Well, for one thing, I'm smart. I'm both a doctor AND a romance novelist-slash-smut peddler, so I know what I'm about. But also, love has different languages. Sex doesn't! You don't even need to speak the same language to have sex! But 'love'--" and yes, she was doing finger quotes there "--apparently needs five and if you don't speak the same one your partner or -ners do, your relationship is horribly doomed and you'll die alone forever."

A beat.

"Also not a problem with sex, I'm just saying."

You know, in case anyone was missing the point that sex was better than romance any day of the week and twice on Sundays.

"So anyway, the five love languages are Gift-Giving, for when you or your person are spoiled rotten; Physical Touch, for all you horndogs out there; Acts of Service, for all you kinky horndogs, Words of Affirmation, for you dirty-talkers and people with praise kinks particularly, and...the other one." Which she couldn't be bothered to remember because it hadn't been sexy enough.

"So we're gonna spend the rest of the workshop talking about these languages so all you little kinksters can figure out what floats your boat so that if you one day decide to actually put some effort into your relationship, you might actually not flame out horribly and embarrass yourself so badly that your shame will follow you for forever. That happens sometimes. I've seen it."

Big Thinking, Deep Drinking [Fri, Period 5]

[good_for_six]

This week, class was being held on the beach (sorry, Navaan), with a number of large umbrellas and cabana lounges were set up, along with a pop-up bar were various rum cocktails (and mocktails) were being served.

This is what happened when Isabela got to choose the venue. "Welcome," she greeted them, waving a violently pink drink at them. "You know, last week we didn't get into what philosophy actually is."

"It's basically thinking about thinking." Friendly reminder that Aphra was in possession of a Ph.D. so she knew what she was talking about. "Because people are weird and like to overthink everything, and somehow, if you ask the question why enough, someone will come up with an answer. It mightn't be the right one, but it's sure to be interesting."

"Especially with booze involved," Isabela helpfully added. "So today we're going to asking each other that question, why? And seeing what answers spring to mind when you're sufficiently wasted."

'Why are you like this?' was a perfectly valid question.