So You Want To Be A Jedi, Again, Some More, Monday Period 3

[jedigrammarians]

Aphra was here this week, and she buckets full of paint-balloons that looked to have been appropriated from certain other teachers' classes and a bunch of blindfolds.

This was clearly going to end well.

"Jedi senses," she said. "So one of the many things Jedi were known for was their ability to sense things through the Force rather than their other senses. Especially if they Miraluka since, you know, the whole no eyes things. Anyway in order to hone this skill, they'd practice deflecting blaster bolts while blindfolded."

She lifted the paint-balloon bucket. "Now, I've chosen a safer option, here."

There it was.

Sam Eagle Presents: A Salute To... [Tuesday, 6/8, 4th Period]

[but_mostly_america]

The flag behind Sam today was almost comically large. Almost, but not quite. Perhaps next week it would achieve truly comical proportions. Once again, Sam was positioned behind the podium waiting for class to begin. When it was precisely time for class to begin Sam cleared his throat.

“Welcome back students! I hope you are prepared for another enlightening lecture today! Today we are discussing a most American way of cooking things! Today we shall discuss BARBECUE! I, Sam Eagle, present A Salute To All Outdoor Cookouts, But Mostly Barbecue!”

Where had that grill come from? And that smoker? And who thought that bringing them into a classroom was a good idea? At least nothing was lit. Yet. Don’t get any ideas, Beaker.

“Barbecue has a long and storied history in American cuisine. Why, even George Washington was known to enjoy barbecued meat! In fact, barbecues are a storied political tradition! Very patriotic!” Sam nodded approvingly as he spoke. He did love patriotism.

“Now, many barbecue purists will tell you barbecue must involve pork.” Too bad, Miss Piggy! Nobody was barbecuing eagles, now were they? “But that is not truly a requirement.”

“Now, there are several styles of American barbecue. All are good! All are American, after all! There is Carolina barbecue. There is Memphis barbecue. There is Texas barbecue. There is Kansas City barbecue. California barbecue. And of course, many other styles from many other wonderful American regions!”

No, Sam would not be describing those styles of barbecue. That would make too much sense and this was a class taught by a Muppet.

“Now! Class! What can you tell me about barbecue?”


( Today's inspiration: )

Culinary Crimes; Tuesday, Second Period [06/08].

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Good mooooorning, everyone!" A week off of her culinary bullshit meant that Summer was particularly excited to get back on her horrible, horrifying hype train, glad to be back at the scene of the crime(s) and eager to unleash more mind-boggling recipes on her unwitting (but not entirely unwilling, most of you knew exactly what you were signing up for) students. "Sorry about last week; I was definitely not in a state to even eat normal food, much less deal with anything we'd do in this class, but Prompto sent pics and vids, and I think you guys did a pretty good job. So we're going to take things a little light this week."

Please keep in mind that Summer had lost all sense of perspective when it came to these things, and what she considered 'light' might be entirely out of alignment with what any normal person would. They might not be that bad. They might be far worse than she could ever imagine. She just had no fucking clue anymore, when you got right down to it.

"Mostly, then, this week we'll be focusing on three recipes that emphasis some truly...unique presentations. We'll be starting with a nice, refreshing deviled lettuce, our main event will be utilizing these awesome fish molds we have to make a lovely seafood mousse, and we'll be finishing it all off with a personal favorite and staple in these classes, the liver sausage pineapple."

At one point, this class might as well be 'Summer pulls random foods out of a hat and puts them together.'

"Alright! Let's get started!"

The Art of Haiku; Tuesday, Third Period [05/11].6/08].

[sake_shinigami]

The weather today wasn't exactly going to be condusive to poetry in the park....or at least not poetry in Fandom's park, which was fine by Shunsui, as he had been saving a particular class for a day just like this one that would involve a nice little field trip, so hopefully the students were ready for a bit of a portal hop, though why anyone would object to spending a little time in a beautiful Japanese garden to lounge about and write poetry was well beyond his understanding.

"Welcome to Taizō-in, ducklings," Shunsui announced as they stepped through the portal onto the conveniently lush grounds on a splendidly sunny and just-right coolness, "in northwestern Kyoto, where we shall find ourselves able to embark on a truly authentic Japanese poetry writing experience ♥. Today," he started walked, his robes billowing around him despite the slight breeze in the air not being nearly strong enough for such an effect, "we will be participating in Kyokusui-no-en, or 'winding stream party'. Such parties were quite popular with Japanese nobility and poets, where they would go to a beautiful location to enjoy the winding of a stream or the blossoming of the flowers or the falling of snow, play games usually involving poetry, drink enthusiastically, and see where the night may lead them...♥."

There was nothing subtle about that grin to suggest exactly where that might have been.

"A winding stream party poetry game is simple," he continued, as he gestured toward the winding stream they now found themselves at. "We will each take a seat here on the shore, and it works out well with our numbers, two on each side. Someone will set a cup of sake....well, traditionally sake, since this is a class," he certainly wouldn't call out anyone's underage status, because they knew who they were, "we have instead a refreshing tea ♥...into the water. Participants must then challenge themselves to compose a poem within the time limit set by the passage of the cup floating towards them on the water. When the cup reaches the poet, they must then drink its contents, either in celebration of the poem's completion or as a forfeit if they have not composed a suitable verse in time. Pretty simple, neh ♥? So find a spot you feel is a comfortable distance for poem composition, and I will pour some tea and set the cup loose, and we'll see how you do ♥.

"Any volunteers for our first poet ♥?" he then asked, settling down on a nice spot and lifting the cup and his jug, ready to pour for some poetry.

The Future History of Science, Tuesday 6th period

[what_the_shock]

"So this weekend I realized there's no cure for hangovers even in my time," Miguel said, "so we're going to research and find one. There's plenty of worlds out there, there's got to be something."

He programmed the Danger Shop to give them computers along with the usual lab. "Find something, then test it. Preferably on a lab construct, not yourself." Beaker "Let's see what we can find. Then heck, let's see if we can patent it."

Bounty Hunting for Beginners | Tuesday, 1st Period

[thedadalorian]

This week, the class was instructed to meet out at the shipyard to the Razorcrest. AKA that piece of shit, space equivalent of a Honda Civic. Feel free to not be impressed by it.

"Today we'll be discussing how to transport a bounty," Din said once enough of the class had arrived.

"Believe it or not," Faye shared, "a lot of times, they're not going to want to go with you. You'll probably have to find a way to restrain or sedate them."

Or maybe even both!

If Din was surprised that Faye would drug her bounties, he hid it well. Or just flat out wasn't too surprised by it. It was a decent tactic if you couldn't brute force yourself into things. "They tend to offer bribes to be let go. I wouldn't suggest trusting it without very good proof of validity."

Something small and green that wasn't the usual child skittered on by behind the teachers.

"I know I've offered all kinds of things I don't actually have in order to get someone to let me go," Faye confided, in a truly unsurprising confession. "And so in my experience, a chatty bounty is a tempting bounty, and it's a lot easier if they can't talk."

She didn't always drug them. Sometimes she gagged them, too! Though today they were going to demonstrate a fairly specific means of keeping one's bounty quiet and still, and thus Faye was keeping a pretty close eye on where that skittery little green thing had gone.

"I find it easiest to freeze them," Din said, nodding to bring the class along into the ship where a gremlin had been baited further on in as a demonstration of the method. He could have done it to Faye, but he was pretty sure she'd shoot him in the face. Helmet. Same thing.

He pressed a button before the gremlin could leap at anyone and some dry ice fog unknown vapor obscured it for a moment before revealing a gremlin frozen in carbonite.

"Oh, god, look at it," Faye said admiringly. (She would not have found this as delightful if it had been done to her, no. There would have at least been siren-levels of shrieking, if not gunfire as well.) "And it doesn't hurt him, before any of you animal lovers start crying!"

She did not know this for a fact. She just didn't want to hear about it, honestly.

"Mostly." Din, a little less honesty here!

"I also brought rope and cuffs," Faye offered helpfully, gesturing to where she'd set up an array of totally moddable restraints. She had not, notably, brought any drugs, but she'd happily share any strategies for creepily sneaking up on someone and knocking them out if the students thought to ask. It just seemed like, you know, not a great thing to bring to the whole class.

Magical Theory & Practice, Tuesday, Period 7

[tellmehowstuffworks]

Everyone would have a rock and a flower in front of them this week. "We talked about this previously," Yennefer reminded them, in case they had forgotten, and because she had found puzzling it out for herself to be extremely annoying. Unfortunately, that was rather Tissaia's teaching style. "In the magical tradition I was taught, a basic exercise is to use the energy of the flower to lift the rock." Yennefer demonstrated, picking up her own flower, which withered in her hand as the pebble on the desk rose to float in the air. "This teaches the student how to use energy from outside sources rather than draining her own innate power, and carries a deeper, if admittedly depressing, philosophical lesson: sometimes, the best thing a flower can do for us is die.

"Now. I want each of you, if you can, to lift the rock. Whether you use the flower or not is up to you. Whether you agree with the thing about the flower or not is also up to you, but I would be interested to hear your thoughts."