Getting to Know Your Own Backyard | Monday, Period 1

[futurespacemom]

"Okay, so we promised you we'd get to Pluto, and this is the last week," Hera said. She had to steer them around a few more bits of junk than usual this week on the way to the Ghost, but it was getting better. "Apparently this one's named after another god. Or possibly a cartoon dog? I'm not...really clear on that."

Google was a weird place.

"My credits are on the cartoon dog," Kanan said, mostly just because he was a shit-disturber. "In any case, what we're visiting today is a dwarf planet. Apparently it was demoted from planet status for not being big enough, but it's definitely really close competition with Earth for being the cutest thing in this solar system."

It had a heart on it. The dwarf planet had a heart on it.

So this was a downright romantic jaunt.

Hera grinned at Kanan as she piloted them there; a quick trip through hyperspace to make it in time. "Well, it's probably cuter from orbit, but yeah. It's further from the sun than any of the other planets we've visited. It's got one moon - no idea how cute it is - and it's mostly ice."

"The 'nitrogen, methane, and carbon monoxide' kind of ice," Kanan said, shrugging his shoulders. "Water ice isn't exactly easy to find on planets in this system, apparently. That's okay. Pluto's still cute even if you don't want to walk on it."

Alas, no jaunts planetside yet again. Though the surface was likely solid enough... Kanan looked thoughtfully at the readings on the console.

Hera helpfully pulled up the surface readings on solidity and air pressure. "What do you think?"

"Hey, that's only an average surface temperature of 44 Kelvin," Kanan said, impressed. "That's minus 229 Celsius, or minus 380 Fahrenheit for anybody who needs a conversion." He grinned over his shoulder. "The suits can totally handle that. Who wants to walk on the really cold cute not-planet?"

"Same rules as always," Hera cautioned. "Gravity's a little over half of Earth's; don't make one of us or Chopper have to grab you. Should we land in the heart?" she asked Kanan.

"You know we need to land in the heart," Kanan agreed.

So, there you had it, kids. Going to Pluto.

Sciencing Things Sciencily: Sciencing Harder, Monday

[whatisclocks]

"Today I thought we'd talk about where fish come from," began Philomena. "Which is space."

Someone had perhaps taken away something different from the entire shark episode than everyone else had.

"No one quite knows how space makes fish, but there's got to be loads of 'em, 'cos there's supposed to be infinite space. Down here on Earth is actually an abberation from the regular way things are, 'cos there's no space here, except for in the oceans, where the fish go."

She began to gesture as she paced around the class, the chicken following in her footsteps. "You could say we are surrounded by fish," she said, "All floating in space, watchin' us. Making fish nookie in Uranus and havin' a merry old time mucking about Saturn. Most people don't know this, but the first Space Shuttle was actually invented 'cos they wanted to go fishing."

Beat.

"One of 'em exploded," she said. "As we've all found, you don't want to mess with an angry fish." She let that sink in for a moment. "Now I want you all to think about space fish a lot for your final. How do fish swim in space? What do they drink? How hard is it for a dolphin to have sex in space when it keeps floating about? You have fifteen minutes to research, and then you have to write your paper."

A pause.

"Start now with the sciencing."

Understanding American Holidays, Monday - 3rd Period

[imafuturist]

The classroom was pink. Very pink. And covered in hearts. Because it was time to teach about President's Day!

Okay, that wasn't true. In fact, your teachers might start ranting if they were on that holiday.

"Today we will be learning about Valentine's day. A holiday that, I think at least, more commercialized than Christmas," Tony said cheerfully.

"Which is saying something," Steve said dryly. "This is a day to celebrate being part of a romantic relationship."

"Which makes being single on the day so much fun," Tony added. "When you're young, the holiday involves giving people cards that probably have puns on them and some candy. When you get older it becomes a minefield of finding the perfect gifts for significant others."

And/or drinking alone with some ice cream.

"And when you're even older, a time to sit and contemplate the prospect of spending the rest of your life alone forever."

Steve was soooo cheerful on Valentine's Day. "Today we're going to give you a price list of everything that you, as teenagers, might want to get your significant other--candy, flowers, stuffed animals, dinner out, things like that. We've also given you 35 dollars in Monopoly money, so now you have to decide which things you'd buy and which you'd skip."

"Candy is always a good buy," Tony said, trying not to side-eye his teaching partner there. "If you get turned down, you can always eat the candy yourself."

"But make sure that candy is part of a balanced diet--" Steve shrugged. "I had to do a lot of public service announcements for kids when I first woke up."

Tony nodded along with that a bit helplessly. "Alright, come get your money and pick what you'll be buying for the holiday, kids. Keep in mind that you should always think about what your prospective or current partner actually likes rather than what the holiday tells you they should want, yeah?"

"Especially if you're going the puppy or kitten or pet eel route," Steve agreed.

"...pet eel?" Tony echoed, tilting his head in confusion.

He shrugged. "Trying to give non standard options."

Clearly Tony had been on the internet too much because that suggestion took a traumatizing turn in his head.

"Good rule is no pets and no tattoos," Tony replied. "Kiss of death to a relationship, getting their name inked on you."

"Personal experience?" Steve teased.

Tony tried not to laugh at that, shaking his head. "I don't know where you think I might be hiding a tattoo, Rogers." Then cleared his throat and looked back at the class. "Since this'll be our last class of the summer session, we brought some chocolates for you all to enjoy as well."