Creative Writing--So Simple Even You Can Do It! (Probably)

[doesdoctorstuff.livejournal.com]

"So, like, writing can be really boring."

And good morning to you, class!

"I mean, other people's writing. Writing itself can also be boring, but that's what drinking and sex are for, but that's a future class topic." So, that was in your future kids. Something to look forward to. "It's like our last class--" three classes ago, now "--when we talking about how boring and overused words like 'said' and 'asked' were. As bad as that can be, some writers go out of their way to make their writing extra lame. It's like they were kids and a bunch of cool adjectives and adverbs beat them up a lot and stole their money and never let them sit with the cool kids or something and now these authors have a vendetta against them. Don't be like those assholes, class. You wanna make your writing exciting? You gotta kick your words up a notch. Really make it pop."

Someone had been watching fashion design shows until the wee hours of the morning and it had made an impression. Just be glad she hadn't figured out how to work 'smize' in yet. "Why tell me your hero's eyes are blue when you can talk about his 'aquamarine orbs that darkened as he spoke'? Why say your heroine is running when you can tell me that she's dashing furtively around the corner? And sex scenes! I want to know how slowly her fingers slid over his thick, taut, well-defined abs. I want to know how tightly he wrapped his fist in her waist-length curls of deep, glossy, mahogany reddish-brown silky satin hair. How velvety is his tongue? Huh? Huh? No one knows if you just say, 'he licked his lover'! Instead, you gotta put detail and emphasis on stuff like that. Color, scent, texture, all that stuff needs to come through. But there's never an action or a noun that can't be modified and made better. Let's say your heroine asks someone 'Is that for me?' how is she saying it? Sultrily? Disgustedly? Furiously? Excitedly? Dubiously?" Navaan had pulled a thesaurus out and was flipping through the pages now. "If she's lying on the bed, is she doing it exhaustedly? How about sulkily? Bonelessly? Angrily? What's on the bed? Satin sheets? Cotton blankets? Nothing at all? Is the mattress bare? Is it stained? Is it old? Are there springs missing? We won't know unless you tell us! More is better, right? So then the more detail you can shove in there, the better the scene. This goes, like, triple if you have a word count you're trying to make."

"People are always whining 'show, don't tell,' but then your illustrator storms out because your works are 'obscene' and 'unfit for any but the most debauched' so how're you supposed to show stuff, huh? You gotta paint a picture with words or whatever and you can't do that without adjectives and adverbs, a writer's best friends. I mean besides the booze and dirty toys, but let's not get ahead of ourselves just yet. You need something to look forward to, right?"

Library, Thursday [9/25]

[wildandbrave]

Cosette had not invited her father for Parents' Weekend, though whether it was despite his living just across the causeway or because of it was a debate in which she wasn't taking sides. She saw him all the time, didn't she, what with him being so close? Besides, she knew him well enough to know that if he had an idea of just how strange things could get on the island, he might well decide it wasn't a suitable place for her to be and she liked it here.

Despite the strangeness, yes.

Apparently some of the books she'd been reading lately were thinking along the same lines, since they kept accumulating in little piles around her. Which was fine -- they were within reach that way.

The Art of Baking with Friends, Thursday

[locointhecoco]

Did you miss Pinkie last week? Didja didja didja! She missed you guys! So much! She was super excited to be back this week and hear all about what you did last week without her!

She came back with an ungodly amount of zucchini to use up before they went bad. Ah, the end of summer. Don't you love it?

"Pinkie is back," Derek informed the class. In case they were blind.

"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!" Only Pinkie could get that one word out to so many syllables. "I hope everypony had loads and loads of fun last week even without me! Super sorry to have missed it, but you know how it goes with manticores."

Uh. Sure?

"Today we're gonna make bread out of vegetables! Isn't that fun?!"

Totally fun! "It's sweet like carrot cake," Derek added. Just so people didn't get freaked out about eating vegetables. "And this is the right time of year because it's the freshest you'll get."

"As much as you can tell without anypony to control the weather," Pinkie noted, rolling her eyes. Really, humans. Get your acts together already. "But I picked these zooks out myself, so I guarantee they're the absolute bestest!"

Derek just sighed the sigh of those so deeply put upon that words did not cover it. It was how you knew he'd missed Pinkie last week. How sweet! "Find a partner and start grating zucchinni for the recipe."

Meditation and the Art of Kicking Ass [Thursday, September 25, 2014]

[sith_happened]

"Your parents, siblings, guardians or friends are arriving tomorrow," Anakin said, crossing his arms over his chest. "Or they are not. Either way, it's probably causing you a little bit of stress this week."

He gestured toward the mat at the center of the room. "So we're going to be doing our meditation warm-ups, and then you're going to suit up and try to beat each other in the ring. Exercise and meditation are proven stress-reducers. I want you to leave class today not worried about the weekend."

He smiled. "And come see me if there's anything you don't want me telling your people."