The Ever-Changing Facets of Reality, Monday, Second Period

[stickitupmyjinx]

For the last class of the year, the danger shop was programmed to be as 90s/early 00s as humanly possible. It was skater fashion all over, kids.

"You all made it to the end where the final prize is just within your reach," Wade said in the Serious Announcer Voice.

"By the end of this class," Vanessa intoned in her own best Serious Announcer Voice, "one of you will be crowned the ultimate champion and the others will have to leave the island...forever." And then back to her usual voice for, "Except not really, because they're still not letting us do that. The moose in the office is no fun."

"Oh, come on," Wade hissed. "You've got to be *BEEP*ing kidding me. ... Oh, we're back on that jam? Is that where we're at? Is it?"

Vanessa threw her hands up. "Oh, this is bull*BEEP*. It's the last class! Let us live!"

"We forgot last week, okay? We forgot?" Because clearly it was punishment for that. "It's Real World/Road Rules final exam. You all have to--do something. I don't remember that show. Babe, do you?"

"There was an RV?" Vanessa asked, because no, she didn't really remember either. "You have to do something with an RV? Let's go with that."

"Two team RV race with... A puzzle. Yeah, that sounds about right," he said slowly. "Bonus points for sexual tension played up for the camera."

"If you get to the finish line without crashing the RV, you pass the class. If you crash the RV, you probably still pass because we don't want to do the paperwork to fail you." Look, Vanessa was honest.

Library, Monday

[intotheout]

Tip didn't have a lot of favorite things about this time of year -- in fact, she resented the hell out of it as a general rule, though she'd learned to keep that much quieter and not get it all over anyone else -- but if she had to pick something, she'd pick the gremlin carolers. Hands down.

Hence her listening with rapt attention as an especially small gremlin in a little newsboy cap and scarf belted out a beautiful if unintelligibly growly rendition of "O Come O Come Emmanuel".

She applauded wildly when it finished. The little gremlin bowed and then held out its hand expectantly.

". . . Wait, since when did you guys start expecting tips?"

[open!]

Introduction to Law Enforcement, Monday

[my_own_advocate]

"Alibis," Lucifer announced, writing the word on the blackboard with a swirl. "Every criminal has one. As do most innocent people, as well. But how do you pierce an iron-clad alibi? How do you find the right... questions?"

He paused.

"Two of you are criminals," he said. "You've stolen an important piece of jewelry from the local bank. You will retreat from this classroom to talk for five minutes. Your alibi must involve three places you've visited and two activities you've been involved in. You will return to this class one at a time, for ten minutes each."

He pointed at two students, then pointed helpfully at the door. "Out," he said, and waited for them to leave. "As for the rest of you, your job is to catch them in a lie. You've got ten minutes to question either of them. I expect results."

He hit the blackboard with his charcoal once, for emphasis, then beamed. "This will be fun."