Stephen Spielberg Presents History II: Raiders of the Lost Syllabus, Friday, Period 1

[yakkoyaks.livejournal.com]

Once the class was all settled into their seats, Yakko closed the door, went to his desk, and pulled out a garden hose. He turned it on and let it start spraying water over by his desk.

"Good morning, everyone! Today we're going to talk about the Lost City of Atlantis!"

Yes.

"Nobody knows where it was, when it sank, how it sank, how people survived, or even if it existed. Some well-studied crackpots think it was an advanced society, but if they were so smart, why were they stuck on one small island that sank? Fortunately, we're much better prepared for that kind of thing today." The students might have noticed a big lever next to Yakko right now. They definitely would have noticed it as Yakko pulled it, dropping life preservers, water wings, and oxygen masks from the ceiling onto the students' desks.

"You have plenty of time to put that on before our dramatic recreation of the sinking of Atlantis is complete. Use that time better than the ancient Atlantians did. Make sure you're not just remembered as a myth that Plato probably made up."

And then Yakko sat down as the water spread across the floor. Don't worry, Yakko closed the door so it would adhere to cartoon physics and not let any water out until the room was filled with water, and then there would suddenly be fish and such in it as it splashed down the hall.

Because that was clearly what you were worried about.

Fandom Trail [Thursday, Fourth Period]

[thefearwasreal]

As opposed to last week's bar, this week the class was in a lush, verdant valley, the kind sure to be thriving with all manner of small ()or not so small, furry, woodland creatures. A covered wagon stood in a clearing, several oxen grazing nearby. Oz leant again the side of the wagon, a notebook in his hands, a box by his feet.

"Greetings and salutations. So, since you set out last week, you've set a strenuous pace and covered quite a lot of ground with few incidents, except for the ones that that left..." Oz checked his notes. "Stella with two broken arms and a broken leg. Sadly it also caused you to lose half your food supplies. Even with lowered rations, you're going to run out before your next chance to barter for supplies. Unless, of course, you find some way to supplement your supplies."

He flipped open the box, inside were a set of Nerf rifles (since apparently Oz wasn't going to give them 'real' guns even in the Danger Shop) and ammunition. "You have the rest of the class to go hunting to add to your stores," Oz told them. "The Shop will keep track of who shoots what, but remember, you're limited in how much each of you can carry back to the wagon, so don't get greedy."

Decision Making Skills, Friday, Period 4

[screwyoumarvel]

"Frequently," Steve began, jumping straight into today's lecture, "when one is attempting to make a decision about something, it's a good idea to weigh the pros and cons--or positive and negative things--about each option. For example, take the hypothetical of 'should I move to a universe full of zombies with my girlfriend or boyfriend after graduation, or go to college in my home universe like my parents want me to?' On the one hand, your significant other is in the zombie universe and that relationship is important to you, and maybe you're not sure if you want to go to college at all, but adventure appeals to you, but on the other, it's full of zombies, so there's a definite risk of dying or becoming one of the shambling undead, and you and your significant other might break up in the future. You might not be able to establish a legal identity there. These are important things to consider when making your decisions, even minor ones like 'which outfit should I wear today?'

"Let's play with a hypothetical. You live in a universe that has recently passed a law requiring anyone with any kind of superhuman power to register with the government--which would mean the government would then have your full name, exact details of your powers, and the right to draft you. But you'd be on the right side of the law. So those are some pros and cons right there. I'd like for everyone to brainstorm up any more you can think of, and then you're going to have some homework this week." Steve shrugged. "I know, I know, but you need to practice using these skills. So, any time you find yourselves with a decision to make and you can't quite decide this week, I want you to sit down and make a list of pros and cons, then weigh them before making your decision. That's it. Now. Let's talk about our hypothetical."

Introduction to Robotics, Friday

[not_a_whiner]

"Last week, we gauged your, uh, experiences with technology," Kaidan began. "Obviously I'll be working from examples from my world, so I thought... maybe a lesson on mass effect physics might be useful. I'll talk about that for a bit, then we'll talk about some simplistic mechs, and you can use the last fifteen minutes to start work on your drone."

The classroom had been appropriately outfitted with the materials and gadgets required. He figured most of these kids knew their way around. "You're allowed to help each other out," he added.

Then he took a breath, and dove right in. "We discovered mass effect physics... just a couple of decades ago. Until that point, we thought FTL - faster than light - travel was completely impossible, never mind a lot of the tricks in space craft maneuvering and biotics that we know today. In fact, my people are using mass effect fields in a wide range of ways these days."

He smiled briefly. "Essentially, we rely on a substance called element zero. Eezo's rare, but it's worth getting, because it has an interesting quirk: if exposed to a current, it can change mass. A positive current increases mass, a negative current decreases it. Basically, we can make things heavier or lighter... and that way, we affect gravity, because gravity is the force exerted by any body dependent on its mass. So you can see why it's very useful."

He activated his omni-tool by running his hand over his other arm. "One area in which we employ mass effect fields is production," he said, "creating alloys, for example. Which brings me to the topic of mechs - some of you would know 'em as plain robots. We use mechs for a variety of jobs, like running security or helping us doing the heavy lifting."

A few presses of the button, and an image appeared. "This is a LOKI mech. It's designed to resemble humans - though not too closely. You might've heard about the uncanny valley effect, which inspired designers to stay away from trying to build too human-like bots. Anyway, LOKI mechs are there to run guard duty or security."

"They're simple, easy to build, and they can handle a whole variety of tasks. Not just that, but they're easy to network, and maybe even easier to program - so they're ideal for new colonies that need a defense force fast." He paused. "Of course, because their programming is so simple, they're easy to fool and easy to take down, too."

He waved the image away.

"Another example. The FENRIS mech. They're equipped with extra sensory equipment--" One wave of his omni-tool, and the image displayed some details on that equipment. "They are supposed to replace the class drug-sniffing dog, but they're also equipped with defensive measures just in case. Again, though, their simplistic programming means they're not always as effective as they could be, and they're easy to hack into."

If you were Kaidan, anyway, or a quarian.

"That's just a few ways mechs can be designed and used to be effective support tools," Kaidan continued. "These are relatively simple. No AI, and only rudimentary VI. Imagine a computer on legs with a set of hands and a short script plugged into its processor." Beat. "Actually, a lot of the programs used in mechs like this evolved from the discipline of programming behavior for characters in computer games."

He waved the schematic away.

"But that's all for today," he said. "If you want, you can come over and check some of the construction schematics--" They'd been censored to keep the kids from building anything quite like a LOKI, though, "--and otherwise you're free to start working on your drone. If you need any help, you know where to find me."

Study Hall: Friday

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

It appears that Jamie has had enough of the bananas.

However his way of dealing with the issue of too many bananas is to dress them in tiny pajamas and then send his dupes to throw them down the stairs.

Don't ask.

Study Hall is open. Feel free to dress the bananas. Or throw them down the stairs.