School Assembly, Friday afternoon, The Auditorium

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

Before the assembly, The Tick used the same mysterious process that chooses students for the detention lottery for another purpose.

He had written a play. Destiny told him that all the world was a stage and he was but a player, meaning that he was playing the part of someone that got people to play parts that he created. It was very meta.

Anyway, the curtains opened to start the assembly. It was time for The Tick's first play: A Time for Bagpipes.

[OOC: Cast, please handwave getting roped into this as a result of the announcements this morning. It may be a good idea to look at the plottery post to see what I told different people just so you can be better prepared.

Again, I'm very sorry about the last minuteness and the general WTFery of this. Feel free to go nuts, though. This is a play by The Tick that you had at best a couple hours to look over. Things need not make sense have fun. And thank you for volunteering and attempting to make this work!

Oh, and people in the later acts, don't feel obliged to wait for people in earlier acts. Jump in whenever.]

Comments

Act III [Cast]

[bugofjustice.livejournal.com]

Main Cast:

Diego, our hero with broken bagpipes............... Peter Petrelli
Serendipity, a young woman who has looked better... Dean Winchester
The Farmer, a farmer and old friend of Diego....... John Crichton
The Farmer's Wife, a background character.......... Katara
The Farmer's Daughter, a deus ex machina........... Dawn Summers
The King of England, a special guest appearance.... Sokka

Diego returns to his true love with his broken bagpipes only to find that she has changed. He travels to meet old friends who, as it turns out, may be able to fix his bagpipe problem. Also, the King of England appears and conducts a wedding.

[OOC: Characters from previous acts, feel free to get in on this somehow/somewhere.]

Re: Act III [Cast]

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

Farming is a hard job. That's why John's currently asleep on his fake tractor and snoring very loudly. Maybe his wife would bring him some lemonade.

Re: Act III [Cast]

[southernbender.livejournal.com]

His wife did come by. But she wasn't so much in the mood to bring him lemonade. "Husband! Why are you not farming so that we made feed our 16 children?"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

"Our sixteen children may eat when I am done with my nap," Farmer John said, glancing at her. "Why have you not started laundering my clothes?"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[southernbender.livejournal.com]

"Our sixteen children shall not be able to eat if we make no money from your farming! Woe! Woe for our starving children!" Katara replied. She stopped to remember her next line "And because you are wearing your clothes. There can be not laundering while you are wearing them."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

John waggled a finger at Dawn. "You're not dating till you're your mother's age! And that's means not until your OLD!"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn pouted. "There's nobody good to date around here anyway."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[southernbender.livejournal.com]

"Which is as it should be! You're far too young to date," Katara said. "You should get married and have babies instead."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

When the time came for Peter's cue - or maybe he just got shoved out on stage again - Peter showed up, broken bagpipes in hand.

"Hey, it's my best friend, farmer John." Peter then stuck his thumb out to indicate something he'd passed on the way in. "Was that your cow porn magazine out there by the mailbox?"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

"Diego, someone who is not a member of my family!" Farmer John waved. "It was either mine or my 5th youngest son's. We both have a cow...thing."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"That would explain the pictures of veal," Peter replied. He held his hand out for a manly shake. "How's it going? I've missed you since I saw you last. Which was... I dunno. Christening for kid number #16?"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

"My wife is still a shrew, one of my daughter's is in love with a musical instrument and I can't get no satisfaction!"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[saltandammo.livejournal.com]

Dean was shoved onstage, dressed in a copy of the gown Annette wore last act. He looked distinctly unethusiastic.

"Oh woe. Here I sit, afflicted and suffering, waiting for my love to show up and cure me with his magic bagpipes." Seriously, who wrote this kind of stuff.

Re: Act III [Cast]

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn? Totally snickering. God, he made an ugly drag queen.

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Hello, kind sir," Peter said, doing a dramatic gesture that he thought passed for "friendly and chivalrous" but actually took a wrong turn at "trying to conduct without having an orchestra." "Have you seen the fair Serendipity, who is my love even if she is a stripper, which I do not judge her for by the way."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[saltandammo.livejournal.com]

"Oh fair Diego, has the cursed monkeypox so disfigured me that even you don't recognise me?" Dean put the back of his hand to his forehead. "Oh woe. Woe, woe, woe, woe, woe."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

Peter gasped with shock. "How do you know me, man who I've never seen before but is wearing my true love's dress?"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[socksofcool.livejournal.com]

Having lost most of his costume between acts, Seely wandered back onto the stage.

"Woe is me, for I fear that that man with the girly emo hair may never find someone to fix my pipes."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"I am not fixing your 'pipes," Peter said, making the air quotes. Whether he'd forgotten his lines or had gotten distracted by Seely's lack of outfit was a hard thing to judge. "I told you I already have a girlfriend. Who's currently a guyfriend but true love gets past these issues. Not sure how her boss at the strip club's going to take it though."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[socksofcool.livejournal.com]

"Hey, don't knock it until you've tried it, buddy," Seely replied. "In any case, trolls do not often use dirty euphemism in the way that humans do, I was referring to my actual set of pipes."

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Your actual set of - oh right! The angry cat in a bag." It was possible that being on stage for this long meant Peter had begun to repress memories of the show while he was still in it. "Uh, yeah. We've been working on that. There was a whole pre-pregnancy scare. And trust me when I say you do not want to know about the cows."

[ooc: *vanishes to bed*]

Re: Act III [Cast]

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

Sokka was starting to get bored waiting in the wings. His grand entrance was still several script pages away, and he was itching to get onstage.

From his spot hidden in the wings, he called out in a deep, booming voice,

"The King of England commands you to fix the stupid bagpipes already!"

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"I didn't realize you were a bagpipe fan, your majesty," Peter said.

Re: Act III [Cast]

[sarcasm-guy.livejournal.com]

"I don't care about the bagpipes; just fix the monkeypox already!"

Sokka may, in fact, be grumpy.

Re: Act III [Cast]

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Oh," Peter said. "You got it, your majesty. I'll see if I can't get my friend to stop grossing ou... uh, distracting his daughter - no, actually I'm going to stand by the grossing out idea. Either way we'll see if we can't expedite the bagpipes."