Home Economics, Tuesday, period 1

[carbontelepath.livejournal.com]

There was yarn on the tables again. Lots of yarn and crocheting needles. There were also handy guides, and next to Emma on her desk? A box.

Once everyone had found a seat, Emma put her hand in the box and then held up a plain blue dildo. "Today, my dears, you will learn crocheting. You will learn the basics, and the aim will be to --" Her hand went back down into the box and came up with a green crocheted thing with teeth. "-- Make a dildo cozy. If you are uncertain about the shapes or number of loops you will need, I have a collection of dildos in this box which you may borrow."

She looked around serenely. "As you might know, we have a visit from the school board this week. Please treat any possible visitors to the class with respect and answer their questions."


ooc: Picture completely worksafe. Wait for OCD is up

ETA: Please go look at the MidTerm information!

ETA2: Feel free to dildo-mod all you like!

Comments

Tables

[carbontelepath.livejournal.com]

Find one and begin crocheting!

Re: Tables

[misshargrove.livejournal.com]

She took a handy guide and with face red, she shoved her hand into the box(because she really wanted to get a good grade) and grabbed a dildo. But have they been sanitized?! Oh dear god! And she hurried to a table, face down, looking at the hunk of rubber she set before her.

Re: Tables

[moonbrain-tam.livejournal.com]

River picked up a bright red dildo, waved it about a bit, and placed in on the table. She then found some black and purple yarn and began to crochet.

Re: Tables

[jed-clampett.livejournal.com]

Jed didn't find a table, left those to the youngsters. But he did poke his nose into that box and pulled out somethin' he never seen the likes of a'fore.

"What in tarnation?" He flopped it around. It was as red as granny's face when Jethro done tracked in mud on her nice kitchen floor.

Re: Tables

[moonbrain-tam.livejournal.com]

River looked up at the visitor. "Wave it like this," she said, demonstrating.

Re: Tables

[jed-clampett.livejournal.com]

Jed looked at the girl and her red rubber thing and waved his around, copying her. "What's it good for? Seems to me it's a bit big to be swattin' at flies."

Re: Tables

[moonbrain-tam.livejournal.com]

"Oh, but you're wrong," River said, hitting the table with her dildo. "Good fly swat. Perfect present for the wife."

Re: Tables

[tyler-gone.livejournal.com]

Tyler took a rubbery green dildo and poked at it with a forefinger, then started crocheting with orange yarn. He knew what Marla was getting for her birthday now.

Re: Tables

[bound2blade.livejournal.com]

Wakizashi cover. Setsuna was so totally making a wakizashi cover, oh em geeee. Red-faced and very certain that she could figure out the shapes and number of loops without aid, thank you very much, the whole time.

Wakizashi.

Re: Tables

[x5-alec.livejournal.com]

Alec pulled one out at random, then stared at it (http://pics.livejournal.com/x5_alec/pic/0001we7h/g5).

...It seemed to kind of stare back at him.

Re: Tables

[saltandammo.livejournal.com]

Dean picked out a bright purple one, trying hard not to think about where it might have been. He glanced over at Alec and saw him staring. "You waiting for it to do tricks?"

Re: Tables

[x5-alec.livejournal.com]

"I don't think I've seen anything outside of marine life that looks like this," Alec said, waving his at Dean. "I think it's defective."

Re: Tables

[saltandammo.livejournal.com]

"I don't think so," Dean said, his eyes following it as Alec waved it through the air. "I think it might be a more extreme thing like when you get condoms that are ribbed."

Re: Tables

[multi-madrox.livejournal.com]

Jamie looked at the Box O' Dildos.

"Yep. Scott must have dumped her. Either that or that's a sock he's been stuffing in his spandex," Jamie thought to himself.

Re: Tables

[whitedeathpod.livejournal.com]

John took seat and grumbled at the crocheting items. This was just like knitting. He hated knitting.

He sent a few unpleasant thoughts about tying up the teacher and making her knit a car cover.

NOT DIRTY.

Re: Tables

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn took picked some yarn, a crochet hook, and a dildo at random. Think banana, not boyfriend, think banana, not boyfriend, think banana, not boyfriend

Luckily, this distracted her enough that she was actually able to get the hang of crocheting.

Re: Tables

[x5-alec.livejournal.com]

Alec poked at her from behind with his dildo as you do.

Re: Tables

[lilpunkinbelly.livejournal.com]

Dawn eeped, whirled around, and brandished her dildo like a stake, aiming it for Alec's heart. "Don't do that!"

Re: Tables

[electric-sitar.livejournal.com]

Demyx was fascinated by the dildos. And wondered why it needed a cozy if it was just going to be used all the time?

He took a swirly red and blue one, and immediately began wrapping it in his favorite bright blue yarn. Maybe that'd count as cozy.

Re: Tables

[fat-halpert.livejournal.com]

Jim selected a green dildo and started crocheting. He kept it a little loose just because he didn't want to accidentally stab the dildo. It might not be real, but there could still be empathy pains.

And then the dildo started vibrating. "Oh my God."

Re: Tables

[electric-sitar.livejournal.com]

Demyx jumped. "It MOVES! What'd you do to it??" He'd never seen that before!

Re: Tables

[fat-halpert.livejournal.com]

"I think it just likes me," Jim said, prodding the dildo to find the off switch.

Re: Tables

[proudsidekick.livejournal.com]

Layla carefully took a dildo from the box, looking like she was afraid to touch it too much, and just focused on working the yarn correctly.

Re: Tables

[stykera]

Stark was going to try very hard not to think about the purpose of the crocheting. He was just going to sit here and attempt to crochet. Attempt being the operative word.

Re: Tables

[girlsnamehere.livejournal.com]

JD has decided that this project is sexist. And, as such, has begun to crochet what looks like large spherical object.

I will call you Malinda.