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Library, Saturday

Sholeh had been very happy to get a call that morning to ask if she could cover today's library shift. Not for any reason other than because she liked being helpful and enjoyed the library of course. There couldn't BE any other reason for her to want to get out of her room and go somewhere calming and relaxing.

Most certainly not because of any insinuations on radio today. That would be ridiculous! Presposterous! Utterly foolish! And, of course, wholly unnecessary, because she trusted Evan. Even if he was in some girl's room complimenting her flexibility. And offering to "spot" her. He was nice. Compliments and offers to help were just what he did.

See? She was completely unbothered. Totally. Undeniably. Completely.

*Sholeh, are you sure you're all right?*

"I AM FINE!" Sholeh snapped and then stomped away to load up the return cart. With possibly a little more force than necessary.

See? She was great!

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"Actually, it's reported mostly by students who are trying to decipher tiny notes that were written by drunk squirrels," Evan replied, sighing. "I did broadcasts for a whole semester once, remember?"

He was sure he'd reported on some inaccuracies in the past, himself. Now he was feeling really, really bad about any lives he might have ruined in the process.

"Mmm," Sholeh agreed, noncommittally. Another book got placed on the cart with a thunk.

"... You believe them? You're mad at me?"

It sounded bad, he had to admit. He couldn't deny that he'd gone up to Kathy's room, or complimented how good she was at gymnastics or even that he'd offered to be her spotter. But they hadn't done anything. That thought hadn't even crossed his mind.

"Sholeh, would you at least talk to me, please? I went to check up on a person I barely even know that I've been worried about. I stayed in the doorway the whole time."

"Of course I don't believe them!" Sholeh shouted, then winced the way the library seemed to pick up the echo. "I know you didn't do anything! I know you wouldn't do anything! I don't even know why I'm mad! Or jealous! Or whatever!"

She just knew she wasn't some gorgeously alluring girl (because Sholeh had no illusions about how pretty the other students were) who could fold herself into a pretzel while talking to a cute boy about being flexible. She was just quiet, bookish, freckled Sholeh, more rabbit that person sometimes.

And even if Evan assured her again that she was exactly the way he wanted her, that didn't mean she still wouldn't feel the keen sting of comparison.

"But... there's nothing to be jealous of." Evan had winced a bit at the yelling, even found himself taking a step backwards. "She's just a girl who was watching Mister What in the common room one night and she's really out of place in one of the classes I'm in and I wanted to make sure she was doing okay."

"I know that," Sholeh said, shoulders drooping now as Evan stepped away from her. "Well, I mean, I didn't know all of that, but, I mean..."

She didn't know what she meant. Or why there was a big ball of emotion in her throat that now wanted to make her cry.

Uncle Clus-- Fantomex had never warned Evan that girls were going to be like this. It might've been useful if he had.

"What do you mean, Sholeh?"

Because he seriously had no idea what was going on, anymore.

If Fantomex had told him anything, Evan would probably be asking it if were 'that time' and getting a book thrown at his head.

"Nothing," Sholeh said, blowing her bangs out of her face. "I don't mean anything. Just forget it. I should...go shelve things or something. I have work to do."

Look, Evan. Now you made her sad.

"If... if you're sure...?" Evan's expression was more worried than anything, with a fair bit of confusion mixed in for good measure. "I don't want to upset you. If you want me to leave..."

Did girls come with a manual? Would he get a book chucked at his head for looking while he was in the library? Could he win? NOPE.

Why were boys so dense?

*To be fair, Sholeh...* Zhahar began.

=She doesn't wanna be fair right now,= Zeela interrupted. =Fair and over emotional don't really mix.=

"I am not being over-emotional," Sholeh mumbled aloud.

"I never said you were!" Evan was flapping his hands again. How did he keep making this worse? "You heard something distressing on the radio and you're allowed to be upset about it, I promise!"

More hand-flapping. He'd take off at this rate.

"Even if I'd never even think about cheating on you. I'm not interested in Kathy like that. She's nice, but she's no you."

"No, no, that was my sisters," Sholeh said, looking up at him finally so he'd know she didn't think he was saying that about her. "They're telling me I'm overreacting and I know I am! It's just..."

How did she explain that she knew that Evan wouldn't cheat because of the kind of guy he was, not the kind of girl that she was?

Well, making eye contact was actually helping a little. Evan knew that look, a bit, and he chewed his lip for a second before hazarding a guess.

"You're being too hard on yourself right now, aren't you?"

Look, Sholeh. He was the exact genetic copy of a guy who was pretty much the worst mutant to ever walk the Earth. He knew all about being too hard on himself.

She shrugged, listlessly. "I dunno. How do you mean?"

So...probably yes.

"Comparing yourself to somebody you've never even met?"

Seriously. He danced this dance all the time with himself.

Now she was hanging her head. "Maybe," she mumbled. "I don't think I'm ever going to be complimented on my flexibility though."

Oh, Sholeh. Evan chewed his lip, and then stepped up to her. Even from so far back, with a bit of stretching, all he needed was one step.

"I was complimenting her on something she's obviously worked long and hard at," he explained, gently. "Other people being flexible by human standards really doesn't mean quite the same thing to me."

Because Kathy could touch her toes to the top of her head, but Evan could tie his toes in knots.

Sholeh gave him a rather confused look--before quickly dropping her gaze to her toes and blushing beet red. "Errr...usually when someone talks about how flexible a girl is, it's not because it's a competition," she mumbled.

And then, just in case he didn't get it, she added, "I think some of the girls in that magazine were called flexible, too."

"They were," Evan confirmed, blinking, and then blushing a little, too. "Um... but that's not how I was thinking. She was doing warm-up stretches. For her gymnastics. And was touching her toes to her head from behind."

You really couldn't start a conversation with somebody in a pose like that without at least commenting on it.

"Which is more than most people can do, but I really just wanted to talk to her about class, not about the way she was stretching."

"I know, I..." Sholeh sighed again, hands twisting the fabric of her skirt so tightly her knuckles were white. "I know you didn't do anything wrong. I know you didn't want to and that you would never do anything like that."

But there was still displeasure clouding her face.

"I'm just...maybe you should go. I'm not making any sense to even me, so there's no reason you should stay here and get grumped at for things you didn't even do."

Evan swallowed at that, looking down at Sholeh with his teeth worrying at his bottom lip. And then he nodded a little.

"I guess, if you'd rather I go." He sighed and shrugged, sticking his hands into his pockets. "I love you, Sholeh. I just... I don't know. You're the most wonderful person in my life, though. Remember that, okay?"

See, she had been planning on protesting. Planning on explaining that she didn't want him to go, but that she totally wouldn't blame him for not wanting to stay.

But then he'd said...he'd said. "You...did you just say what I thought you said?" she asked, stunned.

Even her sisters were at a loss for comments. And, for Zeela at least, that was saying a lot.

Evan blinked back at her, confused, and then stopped and kind of re-played what he'd just said over again in his head.

Oh.

Oh.

"... I... I shouldn't have said it, should I?" He couldn't take it back. He'd said it and he'd meant it. He couldn't just take it back. "Should I go? I don't want to complicate anything, I know you can't--"

He blew it. He blew it he blew it he--

Sholeh was just going to sit down very heavily on the chair behind the desk. That sounded like the best idea right now. Sitting and blinking and trying to make words happen with her word-hole. But her word-maker was currently on the fritz which made words word wordly word.

"Love?"

Okay, yeah. That was another word she could word. That word was the one that was replaying quite loudly in her ears.

"Love," Evan murmured, nodding a little. "You've been everything for me, Sholeh. I mean, more than being smart and funny and gentle and patient with me. You've been there for me through the worst and when you get hurt I... I can't even think straight. You're the most important person in my life. I love you."

Might as well out and say it now. The damage had been done, what worse could he do?

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