Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Edmund is once again sitting on a stool behind the counter.

"Currying favor. It's a grand tradition. Call the person who curries favor well what you will, sycophant, lacky, brown noser - the fact of the matter is that the person who kisses up to the owner and the customer the best is the one who is going to get the promotions, the raises, and the days off when he or she asks for them."

Edmund stands up and favors the students with a smile that, by now, most recognize bodes ill for someone.

"Today you will break up into pairs and will be competing against your 'partner' for my favor. He or she who wins my favor will receive an All and Sundries gift certificate. How to win? Insult your partner, clean my shop, come up with a way to convince Baldrick to bathe, do something to make me happy. Succeed, and you win riches and possibly early dismissal. Fail, and you will be here for the entirety of today's session and I will send Baldrick to recite the grand tale of his great-grandfather's boil to you - the unexpurgated version."

Comments

Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

If you're really determined to make Blackadder happy, talk Baldrick into bathing. I'll be able to play this between about 9:00 am PST and 2:30 pm PST and again after 5:00 pm PST.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[willbedone.livejournal.com]

Willow gave a little wave. "Hi, Mr. Baldrick."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick gave her a gruesome smile. "'Allo, Miss."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[twohalvesofaphd.livejournal.com]

Zack straightened his shirt and took on a very serious demeanour. "Mr Baldrick, we have something very important to tell you."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick shuffled around to look at the boy and blinked at him.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[willbedone.livejournal.com]

"It's for your own good," Willow said.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick shuffled back to look at the girl and looked a little wide-eyed. "It's for your own good" usually presaged something horrible. Horrible.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[twohalvesofaphd.livejournal.com]

"Mr Baldrick," Zack said in tones of utmost gravity. "Baths give you plague. Unless they're from us, and involve cookies, or cake and possibly tea, as well."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick's eyes got wider and he shook his head quite quickly, sending what one hopes is dandruff flying.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[fates_jaye]

Jaye's not here exactly for the bathing reason. "Hi," she says. "Did you know human spit is cleaner than Windex?"

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

"What's Windex, Miss?"

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[fates_jaye]

Oh, not a good sign. "It's a cleaning spray you use. You know. To keep things clean."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

From the rheumy blinking, one might presume Baldrick doesn't get it.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[fates_jaye]

"See, it's this fascinating new thing they just discovered," says Jaye. "Things get dirty, and then they get clean, just so they can get dirty again. It's awesome."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

"Not if they just stay dirty and skip the middleman." Baldrick apparently heard Blackadder talking business sometimes.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[fates_jaye]

"But that's not as much fun."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

"Plague isn't fun, Miss."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[chasingsnitches.livejournal.com]

"Mr. Baldrick," Cedric says. "You should take a bath, sir."

Start them off slow and ease into it, Cedric thinks.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick shook his head, looking panicked about all these students who kept wanting to kill him.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[chasingsnitches.livejournal.com]

"So...if I set you up on a date, you wouldn't take a bath to impress said woman?"

Jaye's going to kill him.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

"I have to be true to meself," Baldrick said sagely.

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[chasingsnitches.livejournal.com]

"And if she bought you dinner and took you to a movie? Gave you time off from your work and only wanted you to take a bath so she could better enjoy your company, you still wouldn't?"

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

"Who wants a woman who wants to change you before the first date? Me mum would never have it."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[chasingsnitches.livejournal.com]

He nods and might actually agree with that.

"What if you just washed your hands?" Cedric asks. "Date for a vigorous hand washing?"

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

[blackadder-nth.livejournal.com]

Baldrick looked at the dirt ground into his hands. "How's about I scrub the floor and then we go out? All that dipping me hands in soapy water is as good as a hand wash."

Dirty soapy water, but there was soap involved.