fandomhigh | Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

Edmund is once again sitting on a stool behind the counter.

"Currying favor. It's a grand tradition. Call the person who curries favor well what you will, sycophant, lacky, brown noser - the fact of the matter is that the person who kisses up to the owner and the customer the best is the one who is going to get the promotions, the raises, and the days off when he or she asks for them."

Edmund stands up and favors the students with a smile that, by now, most recognize bodes ill for someone.

"Today you will break up into pairs and will be competing against your 'partner' for my favor. He or she who wins my favor will receive an All and Sundries gift certificate. How to win? Insult your partner, clean my shop, come up with a way to convince Baldrick to bathe, do something to make me happy. Succeed, and you win riches and possibly early dismissal. Fail, and you will be here for the entirety of today's session and I will send Baldrick to recite the grand tale of his great-grandfather's boil to you - the unexpurgated version."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Mr. Baldrick," Cedric says. "You should take a bath, sir."

Start them off slow and ease into it, Cedric thinks.

Baldrick shook his head, looking panicked about all these students who kept wanting to kill him.

"So...if I set you up on a date, you wouldn't take a bath to impress said woman?"

Jaye's going to kill him.

"I have to be true to meself," Baldrick said sagely.

"And if she bought you dinner and took you to a movie? Gave you time off from your work and only wanted you to take a bath so she could better enjoy your company, you still wouldn't?"

"Who wants a woman who wants to change you before the first date? Me mum would never have it."

He nods and might actually agree with that.

"What if you just washed your hands?" Cedric asks. "Date for a vigorous hand washing?"

Baldrick looked at the dirt ground into his hands. "How's about I scrub the floor and then we go out? All that dipping me hands in soapy water is as good as a hand wash."

Dirty soapy water, but there was soap involved.

"I'm sure that would be fine with the certain person I have in mind ~~who knows I'm doing this, btw~~. She'd appreciate soap use."

Not a bath but there's cleaning involved.

"A'right. Who is she? How're her hips? Can't waste me time with a woman with bad hips. Baldrick babies have big heads."

"Oh, it's Jaye Tyler," he says and points to where she's standing. "Her hips seem adequate enough."

Baldrick blinked over in the direction of Fashion Plague Girl. "She wants to go out with me?"

"She does, sir," Cedric says and nods. "She told me so."

"I don't know..." She was a bit too squeamish of leeches.

"She could get you in free to the theatre," Cedric says quickly. "She works there. She's almost the boss. And she'd pay for dinner too. You'd enjoy a night out with a woman for free. And all you'd have to do is scrub the floor."

"I could give it a try. Shouldn't I ask her for out first? Give her a traditional dried frog posey?"

"That might be a wise thing," Cedric says. "Impress but don't let her get a word in. Let her know you are the male and you are taking her out on the date. And then you can scrub the floor."

Alas for Cedric, clever though his plan certainly was, this meant that Baldrick was about to scurry off to catch some frogs to dry out for the posey.

However, the next time Jaye Tyler shopped at All and Sundries promised to be interesting.

Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous