fandomhigh | Retail 101, Monday morning, All and Sundries

Edmund is once again sitting on a stool behind the counter.

"Currying favor. It's a grand tradition. Call the person who curries favor well what you will, sycophant, lacky, brown noser - the fact of the matter is that the person who kisses up to the owner and the customer the best is the one who is going to get the promotions, the raises, and the days off when he or she asks for them."

Edmund stands up and favors the students with a smile that, by now, most recognize bodes ill for someone.

"Today you will break up into pairs and will be competing against your 'partner' for my favor. He or she who wins my favor will receive an All and Sundries gift certificate. How to win? Insult your partner, clean my shop, come up with a way to convince Baldrick to bathe, do something to make me happy. Succeed, and you win riches and possibly early dismissal. Fail, and you will be here for the entirety of today's session and I will send Baldrick to recite the grand tale of his great-grandfather's boil to you - the unexpurgated version."

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"Cake with the good chocolate," Willow said. "And ice cream."

"With sprinkles?" Best not to think of what Baldrick's idea of sprinkles might be.

Zack hoped that Baldrick was asking because he liked sprinkles. "The sprinkles are what makes it special."

Baldrick grinned and ducked his head a little. "Cake with sprinkles. I'd like that."

"And tea," Willow reminded him. "Cake, tea, no death."

"And tea." Baldrick gave Willow a worried look. "Why did you mention death? The tea isn't going to make me sad, shouty, forgetful, happy, and then die, is it?"

"Not at all," Zack said soothingly. "The tea helps keep the plague at bay. Like liquid dirt for your insides."

The liquid dirt tack seemed to work and the worried look left Baldrick's face.

Willow gave Zack a look, but pressed on. "So, see? No death. Death would be bad. It would make people unhappy and some of might get failing grades, not that we're being graded on this."

[ooc: must go to work, back later, feel free to press on without me in the meanwhile]

Baldrick now looked confused. These two wanted to give him cake with sprinkles and liquid dirt tea? Why?

Apparently he was in bath denial.

"Just remember, no baths, no death," Zack said, deciding that the dumping a vat of tea over Baldrick option was looking better and better.

Baldrick could get behind the idea of not bathing and not dying, so he nodded enthusiastically.

Another louse civilization fell to earthquake and natural disaster.

"Yay for understanding!" Willow said, possibly vastly overestimating her and Zack's grasp of the situation.

"Where are the cake and tea?" Baldrick asked, looking around.

"Zack has it," Willow said, without hesitation.

Zack's reaction to that resembled flailing in no way, shape or form. "Yes, yes I do."

"I don't see it," Baldrick said, looking around.

"That's because it's in storage. In the special cake with sprinkles storage container."

"And it would spoil if taken out too early," Willow added.

Baldrick was confused again. Surprise. "I should go. You're not going to do anything bad to me, are you? Me mum warned me about people acting nice and offering cake."

"Of course not," Zack said. "We're only trying to help you."

"Help me what?" Baldrick shuffled back a few paces.

"Aviod the plague."

"With cake?"

"And tea."

Re: Kissing up for the adventurous

blackadder-nth.livejournal.com - 2006-08-01 04:17 (UTC) - Expand

twohalvesofaphd.livejournal.com - 2006-08-01 04:38 (UTC) - Expand

blackadder-nth.livejournal.com - 2006-08-01 16:55 (UTC) - Expand