fandomhigh | Try Not to Die, Tuesday, May 30, 2017

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Try Not to Die, Tuesday, May 30, 2017

"Today we're going to Botswana, which is in Africa," Anakin said. "Waaay down here," he added, pointing to the map. He smiled ~~evilly~~. "And we're upping the difficulty level slightly today."

Think "animals that can eat you," kids. Anakin was an amazing teacher this way.

[OOC: Up early for potential baby-having shenanigans tomorrow.]

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...animals that can eat you?

Khadgar

Jason Lee Scott

Ahsoka Tano

June Iparis

Kaylin Neya

Merrill

Jyn Erso

Welcome to the Okavango Delta, home of the Nile crocodile, among other things that will definitely eat you. You must water ski along it for a mile to even get to the Roadblock. Isn't that fun?

So fun.

Once you arrive (presumably uneaten) at the Roadblock, you must get two live goats into a makoro, a traditional canoe. Then you must stand up and use a long pole to get the boat and the goats back to the place where you started out water skiing.

So yes, get the live goats past the crocodiles. Yay, class!

[Current order:
1. Ahsoka Tano
2. Hyacinthe
3. Khadgar
4. Rey
5. June Iparis
6. Kaylin Neya
7. Merrill
8. FN-2187
9. Jason Lee Scott
10. Jyn Erso]

On one hand, Khadgar felt slightly bad about using some magic to make the makoro move faster. On the other hand, there were carnivores in the water and he wanted to live, thank you very much.

Yeah, so. Jason fell out about halfway through. On the bright side, at least the goats did not. He felt a little bad about the crocodile that broke a tooth trying to chomp on his arm, but not that bad.

Seriously, Anakin?

Ahsoka felt no qualms whatsoever about using the Force to push the canoe along and the crocodiles away.

June couldn't rely on magic, which she thought was more than a little unfair. She hd to rely on her strength and sense of balance.

... which got her and the goats dumped in the water. Twice. If she never had to wrestle a wet goat into a canoe again, it'd be too soon.

The water skiing went dreadfully, but somehow Kaylin managed to both get the goats in the boat thingy and scare the crocodiles. Or maybe they were still laughing hysterically at her skiing.

. . . look, just because Merrill could use her magic to distract the crocodiles so they wouldn't get ideas about eating her or the goats, it didn't mean she wasn't going to fall out of the canoe. Repeatedly.

What.

All right, maybe she shouldn't have accused the class of not being deadly enough. This was kinda ridiculous.

Now you get to travel in a "safari taxi" (Land Rover with terrible shock absorption) to Royal Tree Lodge Game Preserve where you get to pick between two activities: Brains or Brawn.

In Brains, you take a horseback safari and search the brush for metal outlines of the following animals: zebra, African buffalo, kudu, giraffe, meerkat, boomslang snake, leopard, warthog, ostrich, and hippopotamus with a heron. After completing the tour, you are given a set of tiles featuring the silhouettes of the animals. You have to place them in the order they appeared. The are tiles for animals you did not see. There is no tile representing the hippopotamus, but there was one for the heron. If you don't get the order right, out you go on the safari again. This could take hours.

In Brawn, you get to deal with even more animals because your day hasn't made you smell like goat enough. You have to fill a traditional sand sledge with firewood and then, using a carrot dangling from a stick, coax a team of donkeys to pull the sledge to a campsite over a half mile (0.80 km) away. The donkeys, needless to say, don't care about the carrot at all.

After the ride in the Land Rover, Khadgar was pretty sure he'd get super nauseous if he went anywhere near donkeys, and he thought he was pretty smart, so he picked the Brains option.

It turned out, he wasn't as good at memorizing things as he thought, and it took way, way too long for him to get the tiles in order.

Jason's life had already had enough animal-herding misadventures before today, thank you. He was fairly certain cheating and just pulling the damn sledge himself wouldn't be allowed, so horseback safari it was.

Now, just because he had been a jock once upon a time, that didn't mean he was stupid, but memorization tasks weren't exactly something he enjoyed. Still, it was better than the alternative, even if it took for-goddamn-ever.

Ahsoka had been making good time with the donkeys, until something spooked them and they bolted. In the wrong direction.

When they finally did stop running, Ahsoka had to let them rest up again before turning them back the right way.

June went with Brains, because most of these animals were extinct in her world and she wasn't sure when else she'd get a chance to see them. And honestly, she had fun with it. For once, all the work she'd put into her classes at home actually paid off.

There was no way Kaylin was going out to LOOK for more animals that might kill her.

So she filled the sledge, coaxed (or scared) the donkeys, and survived the day somehow.

Merrill would actually have done quite well with the Brains exercise, because what kind of Keeper's First would she be if she wasn't any good at memorizing things?

But there were actual animals to ~~play with~~ handle in the Brawn option, and she went with that.

It went very poorly, to say the least, despite all her attempts to wheedle the donkeys into moving a little faster. Or in the right direction.

Jyn had a good memory and needed to make up time, so she took a risk and went for Brains. Somehow she managed to get it right the first time.

Do not throw a clod of dirt at his head, no matter how tempted you are.

"You know," Jason said sourly. "If I was a vegetarian, this would've been enough to make me reconsider. Animals are assholes,"

Anakin laughed. "The donkey or the goats?"

Ahsoka threw it at his front instead.

"Gundarks," she said ominously. She wasn't entirely sure what she was going to do with them, or where she was going to find them, but one way or another there would be gundarks in Anakin's future.

"Where did you see gundarks?" Anakin asked, brushing the dirt away.

"I had a vision," Ahsoka deadpanned.

Anakin snorted. "Really."

"Gundarks everywhere, just like Vanqor."

Edited 2017-05-31 04:15 (UTC)

June pouted briefly when she realized FN-2187 had beaten her, but the annoyance couldn't dampen her smile for long.

"That was actually pretty fun," she reported. "We don't have a lot of animals at home."

"Good," Anakin said. "I liked the water skiing, myself."

Fourth? Well that was a miracle. If Kaylin actually believed in any of the gods she might have thanked them. Mostly for not letting her get killed, not the coming in fourth thing.

The RNG speaketh:

1. FN-2187
2. June Iparis
3. Jyn Erso
4. Kaylin Neya
5. Hyacinthe
6. Rey
7. Khadgar
8. Ahsoka Tano
9. Jason Lee Scott
10. Merrill

Eeeeee baby shenanigans!

I HAVE BEEN VERY PATIENT, BUT IT'S TIME GO, LEMON.

THE BABY IS JUST BEING FASHIONABLY LATE.

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Try Not to Die, Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Sign in 5/29

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Roadblock!

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Detour: Brains or Brawn

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Find Anakin!

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OOC

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