fandomhigh | Relationships for Dummies, Monday

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Relationships for Dummies, Monday - 2nd Period

For class today, Deadpool arrived fifteen minutes late and carrying Starbucks. He was really committed to this entrance. It was a thing.

"Okay, so last week was the 4th of July and I see most of you still have your hands." A beat. "Good for you. Not having to know what a hand growing back looks like. That's a good thing. Though a pirate hook would be pretty sick."

It so would be.

"My lovely fiance can't join us today because this weekend was the worst thing ever. So, you get to deal with just me," he said cheerfully. "And since we didn't get introductions last week, let's get some of those. And, I don't know, tell me something about relationships you want help with. If this is a Cosmo question, at least make it an interesting one. Or the kind that would get you kicked out of class in a normal school where you don't wake up with random amnesia."

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Wishing you had Starbucks

Alex Mack

Rey

Frank Doyle

Dipper Pines

Xanthippe Voorhees

Probably still wishing you had coffee.

"I'm Rey. And I don't... really have relationships," she admitted.

"Don't have relationships as in you're a brooding loner who shuns social connections because they weaken you and probably wear a really dumb mask and cape?" Deadpool asked. Yeah, he was totally thinking of the garbage version of Ben.

"No, I'm just from where there aren't many people," she said, giving the guy in a mask a weird look.

He was also a brooding loner, but he had a tagtag bunch of pals. One was even blind!

"Rural Minnesota?" Deadpool asked sympathetically.

"Jakku. No one's heard of it," she assured him.

"Which I'm still assuming is in rural Minnesota." Mostly because fuck that place.

"I'm Frank Doyle and I'm already in the most loving relationship anyone could imagine," Frank said. He raised his glass, looked it it lovingly, and drank. "Unless they have a really amazing imagination, of course. Maybe the question would be 'How do I get a better imagination?' But I already have an answer for that." He took another drink.

"You get an A if you share that."

He was just encouraging Frank to have an open relationship. Really.

"What do I get if I don't?" Frank checked.

"The spite and hatred of your teachers?" Deadpool suggested.

"While I could live with that, it's against my better nature to refuse somebody liquor if they really want it," Frank said, pouring three glasses and holding one out for Deadpool to take.

"Uh, yeah... I'm Dipper?"

Yes. He made that sound like a question.

"And, uh, I just guess I want to know if there's a way for a girl to think of you someway that isn't just a friend?"

"Ah, Friendzone Pete," Deadpool said, nodding to himself. "Didn't I teach your sister?"

"Mabel? Hyperactive boy chaser with a thing for glitter?"

"I'm Alex Mack," Alex said "and I guess I'm kind of seeing someone," she didn't really know what to call her relationship with Hunter.

"Kind of? Are you partially blind?" he asked. "Oh my god, is this a Nicholas Sparks thing?"

The one who was there. And no longer named 'Hal'.

This class brought to you by an internet outage and a migraine. Yaaaaay.

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Relationships for Dummies, Monday - 2nd Period

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Talk to the Teacher

OOC