fandomhigh | The Science of Sexuality, Monday

Entry tags:

sex ed

The Science of Sexuality, Monday

Sherlock would have spent the period ranting about how every single person in his class needed to wave a tube tied or snipped to prevent the abominations of this weekend from coming true. But John had actually put his foot down on the matter. The bastard.

"Today was scheduled to be about the importance of contraceptives, but somehow I think the presence I'd your little spawn has done it for me," he said with less a smile and more twitch at the corner of his mouth. "So. I'm certain Doctor Watson could give you the names of a few clinics to prevent this past weekend from ever happening. John?"

John... was going to ignore him today. Especially after making him deal with Kasei for most of the weekend. "What I think would be useful for all of you is some folders about, er, parenting," he said, determined not to flounder on this one. He had many folders. Many many folders in many colours. "Make sure all of your children are bathed and fed, and if any of them are showing any signs of illness this weekend, please bring them by the clinic. Having children is perfectly natural, no matter what my colleague might say, though I'd hope you'll all... wait until you're a bit older."

Sherlock slouched low in his seat, ignoring John like the healthy, mature, responsible adult that he was. "A beauty and a joy, I'm sure."

"Maybe you should have thought of that before you made a pass at miss Kuukaku," John said, like the equally healthy, mature, responsible adult he was.

"Jealousy is hardly becoming, John." No, they weren't giving off a heterosexual impression today.

"You could at least try to feed your own child!"

... No. No, they were not. Maybe they could slip out unnoticed among all the children? Please?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You'd have trouble too if you'd had to deal with Kasei all weekend.

Nathan had done the smart thing and left his kid back in the room for Caroline to deal with because she deserved it after yesterday. Hopefully mother and daughter hadn't killed each other by the time he got back.

Peter would just be over here, snickering.

Ah, the joys of no fake-spawn to call his own.

Right, there was a text being sent Peter's way right now.

I can hear you, Bishop.

Aurally? Mentally? Both, knowing Emma, who was giving him a dirty look.

Peter glanced over before her responded.

Two kids? Wow, someone got really unlucky in all this nonsense.

Because that was how Peter was viewing it all. Which, as has been mentioned before, was ironic in the whole 'viewing family members from an alternate universe' scheme of things.

Yes, well, at least Emma was still blissfully ignorant of having thousands of cloned daughters in the future. Two? Not so bad.

Karla has seven or something like that. Emma tapped out quickly. And Miss Dahlia here - and Emma bounced the child on her lap - apparently has three mommies and no daddy that's she's named. Yet.

And you can't just read her mind to find out?, Peter replied. It seemed the most prudent answer. Hell, if he could read minds, he'd definitely be probing any kid trying to say it was related to him. As far as he was concerned, this was just another invasion. He half expected them to turn into murderous Children of the Damned at any second.

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

icecoldfrost - 2011-02-14 20:23 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

cuckoos-child.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:25 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

theotherpeter.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:35 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

icecoldfrost - 2011-02-14 20:47 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

cuckoos-child.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:49 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

glacial_queen - 2011-02-14 20:51 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

icecoldfrost - 2011-02-14 20:53 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

icecoldfrost - 2011-02-15 14:16 (UTC) - Expand

Emma had both her daughters with her, for varying degrees of success. Annika was perfectly happy rolling her eyes at the teachers and texting her father. Dahlia, on the other hand, had claimed Emma's lap as her own, and was coloring happily on the folder she'd gotten.

It should be noted that Emma wasn't trying to stop her, and instead was texting her co-mothers about who had what child for lunch-duty.

*I am right here,* Karla reminded the third time her phone beeped and there was a slight scuffle over who got to answer Mommy's phone this time. *Psychic threads. They're a marvel.*

<<This is more fun,>> Emma ~~whined~~ noted, watching the fight for the phone with a smirk. <<At least I'm keeping them amused?>>

Not helping, Emma.

*They'd been doing fine with the crayons and coloring books!* Karla pointed out. *And more quietly, too.*

Switching to an open thread, she turned around to give Nommy a Look. *Nommy, you got to answer Mommy's phone last time. Let one of your sisters answer it.*

Karla didn't have all her children with her today. Dahlia was with Emma and Bobina was with Bobby, but both she and Warren were in this class and Rook and Della didn't have anyone but her so...yes. Karla was there with a lot of children, desperately hoping they'd be able to color and draw quietly and without fighting for the full hour.

It was for that reason they each had their own coloring book and box of crayons. Karla wasn't about to push her luck making anyone share.

Quinn had taken Beth to class with her, since they were going to the hotel right from school anyhow. The girl seemed content to thumb through Teen Vogue while they sat in class. (Coloring, Beth believed, was for babies.)

She couldn't help smirking at the people who were burdened with more than one child. As kids went, she'd gotten off easy.

//What's con-tra-cept-ive, Mummy?//

Cally didn't mind the question, so much the volume at which it was broadcast. Pretty much anyone with the least amount of psi talent would be covering their metaphorical ears.

"Inside voice, Sjoerd."

Which, well, it had been, but there was inside inside voice, and then there was that.

//It's something that stops people from making children by accident.//

//Stupid long name for Big Yellow Button on the replication unit!//

Replication was a lot easier to pronounce in your head than out loud. So was con-tra-ceptive.

//....Something like that.//

Cally made a mental note to explain to him later if... there was a later. She could always pin a note to his clothing. Dear future self...

*Cont-tra-cepty brews are what Mama makes for the Blood, and she says I'm their best salesperson.* Dahlia shared, equally as loudly.

*She makes it for her and Daddy, too!* Nommy added, not wanting to be left out of the conversation. *She calls it her two're enough tea!*

Karla would just be slowing sinking into her chair and hoping the Nommy had remembered to keep it on a focused thread and not just broadcast to anyone in the room.

[Props go to

icecoldfrost for the comment and anyone can feel free to have 'heard' that in their heads.]

Cally just covered her mouth and tried to pretend she hadn't heard that and didn't think it was funny, neither of which was true.

Emma? Not even pretending she hadn't heard it.

She was outright snickering at poor Karla, even as she whispered to Dahlia that we don't share things like that with strangers, because Mama didn't have enough time to make some for everyone.

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

glacial_queen - 2011-02-14 20:11 (UTC) - Expand

//Just two?// Sjoerd replied, to no one's surprise on as close to an 'open channel' as Auron telepathy got. //Everybody I know but me has lots and lots of sibs!//

Or, you know, eight, which was the most the replication chambers would make at a time. But he was six; his maths concepts only went so high.

Edited 2011-02-14 19:53 (UTC)

*Just two usually,* Nommy said. *That's my sister,* he pointed at Kayla, the other child with wings, *an' that's our Daddy,* he pointed at Warren, *but this weekend I have six sisters!*

He said it in the same tragic tones that Karla had adopted when speaking of her seven children. *Sisters are gross!*

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

cellsandsaints.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:14 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

wingedwitchling.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:27 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

cellsandsaints.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:30 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

wingedwitchling.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:40 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

cellsandsaints.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 20:48 (UTC) - Expand

//My mom and dad say just me is all they can handle// Annika supplied, rather smugly. //And sometimes they talk about whether Dad should get fixed, but I don't know how he's broken.//

Just in case anyone in class was interested. In fact, even if they weren't, Annika didn't like being left out of the conversation.

*It means bein' spayed,* Kayla replied matter-of-factly. *Elizabeth's kitty Joni had to get fixed so she can't have no kittens. And that's called bein' spayed.*

Jack would just loooove to hear that, surely.

Re: Listen to the... Let's Not Even Pretend It's A Lecture

ofthe-blood.livejournal.com - 2011-02-14 21:03 (UTC) - Expand

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only