fandomhigh | Library [06/02]

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library

Library [06/02]

Once the library was set up for the day, Sam went into list-making mode. One set of lists was everything he planned on taking with him to New York vs. what he was going to leave at the house vs. what he was going to throw out or give away. Then came the lists of what was going to get packed together (to lead to the fewest amount of boxes possible, of course), and then the lists of what he was going to bring to New York when he visited Peter vs. what he'd be bringing when he actually moved. That list was mostly books; hopefully Peter wasn't kidding about putting up more bookshelves for him or they were going to be tripping over Sam's collection in every room.

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Dean? Totally wasn't codependent. Really. He had just gotten used to eating lunch in the library on Wednesdays and if Sammy was there, it would've been rude not to share so...

Sam was totally not codependent either. There was nothing wrong with spotting his brother coming in for lunch and grinning at him like he was excited to see him. "Hey Dean, how's it going?"

"Oh, y'know," Dean said, taking his usual seat with a grin. "Same old, same old. You're all bright eyed and perky today."

"I'm getting organized. It's crazy, I know, but it make me feel better," Sam said.

"My OCD brother," Dean teased.

"I'm not OCD. It's not like I get up in the middle of the night to make lists or something. Although I did have a nightmare about leaving all of my books in Fandom and not being able to get them for college," Sam admitted. "But that's different."

"See, most people just have dreams of showing up in class without pants," Dean pointed out.

"Yeah, but seeing how the only class I'm going to right now is yours, the dream would more likely be me showing up without pants and you turning it into a lesson," Sam said.

Dean snorted. "The only lesson I'd get out of that was that there's a time and place and class isn't it. And then I'd check to see if you'd got gremlinbit."

"My goal is to not get bitten at all before I leave," Sam said. "I've made it this far safely, knock on wood."

"You've managed four years, I think you can keep it up for another three months," Dean encouraged. "It's not like you're a Skywalker."

"True," Sam said, although his smile faltered a little. "And it's not like it'll be that long. I, uh, I'm not sticking around for the second half of the summer."

Dean froze, with his burger halfway to his mouth. "You're what?"

"I'm moving in with Peter," Sam said. "I'm going to spend a few weeks learning my way around the city and being with Peter before classes start. I...I didn't know you were going to be here, and I didn't know Dad was going to leave and...are you pissed?"

Dean didn't answer that. "Is this some kind of way to prove we're not codependent or something?"

Sam couldn't help but laugh as he shook his head. "No, this has been my plan since pretty much graduation. It's not about you, it's about Peter and how much I miss him."

"So... when I told you I'd come back to spend your last summer in Fandom with you, you knew you were going to leave halfway through and didn't bother mentioning that?" Dean's tone was making the answer to Sammy's question a little more obvious.

"I thought that maybe you being here would make me change my mind," Sam said. "Or Dad being gone would, or Peter would change his mind or...something would happen that would lead to me not disappointing you."

Dean wasn't going to bring up the whole thing about how this was Sammy keeping things from him again, even as he swore he wasn't going to keep any more secrets. No, he was too busy focused on - "You're ditching me to go shack up with your boyfriend a couple of months early."

"I'm not ditching you," Sam said. "It's not like I'm leaving and I'm never going to speak to you again. I just won't be here."

"Where I am. Because I came back to spend your last summer with you before you go off to college," Dean restated the main points in case college boy hadn't actually figured that much out.

Sam sighed, looking genuinely guilty. "I haven't done very well this summer, have I? In the 'good brother' category."

Dean sighed. "I may have been riding you a little hard," he admitted. "But... is it really so bad here that you really can't wait to leave it? I thought you liked it here as much as I did."

"No, I love it here. Fandom is our home, for as long as Dad and Zoe want it to be," Sam said. "If I had my way, you and Peter would both be here and I'd be able to stay here and go to college too. But that's not how it works."

"You're not supposed to leave for college early though," Dean protested. "I didn't leave early. Hell, I even came back this summer!"

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