Bad Ash's Art Appreciation, Lecture #3

[names-ash.livejournal.com]

::"Bad" Ash stands in front of the class in his bathrobe and slippers, a clipboard in his hand. He is quietly humming "Mmmm Bop"::

::He patiently awaits for all the students to take their seats, and when he is sufficiently satisfied the students are all here, he removes his robe and stands in front of the class, wearing nothing but slippers and a smile::

"Today, we will be discussing the classical nude!" ::laugh::

"First, I welcome any other students to embrace the classical nudity as well! Today's class is clothing-optional!" ::laughs again::

"Now kids... why is the naked body so damn awesome?" ::starts doing muscle flexing poses:: "Especially the King's naked body? Why do artists usually believe that people in art should be naked? Why don't normal people believe people should be naked? And most importantly... why is it suddenly cold in here?"

"Bad" Ash stands, awaiting answers and discussion.

Comments

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

Lisa looks on in mock horror, but suppresses a giggle. She whispers, "Oh holy shit. I am so not kissing ass in class today. With my luck he'd take that literally."

[courier-gavin.livejournal.com]

"...I think my brain just broke. Thanks so much." Jake lets his head fall down on his desk, whimpering.

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

"Are they starting an ABBA singalong, naked!? Mamma Mia is right."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty looks at Lisa slightly panicking. He points at the grilled ham & cheese sandwich and then himself.


So when you’re near me, darling can’t you hear me
S. O. S.
The love you gave me, nothing else can save me
S. O. S.

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

Lisa looks concerned. She jokes around with Marty, but she has a strange affection for the kid. "Marty, are you okay? Is it the sandwich? Something in the sandwich?" She gets up and kneels in front of him, looking him over for physical signs of illness.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty nods and points at the sandwich again. He pantomimes eating


I was sick and tired of everything
When I called you last night from glasgow
All I do is eat and sleep and sing


Marty sighs.

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

"Okay, okay. Can I take the sandwich from you?" She gestures to it.

"Are you having any other symptoms? Can you nod for yes and no?"

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty points to the sandwich and nods.

Points to himself and mistakenly opens his mouth


Don’t look too deep into those angeleyes
Oh no no no no
Ah-ha-ha, ah-aaaah
Ah-ha-ha, ah-aaaah


Sighs and shakes head. He pulls out a pencil and writes out "Bork Bork Bork" and then points at the sandwich again. He then draws a rather grotesque sketch of himself killing the Swedish Chef.

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

Lisa slips off her cardigan, and uses it to cover her hands and pick up the sandwich. She wraps it up and ties the sleeves together in a bundle. Perhaps she can bring it by Ms. Sidle to do an analysis?

Lisa laughs, and then covers her mouth looking apologetic. "Sorry. What did you do to piss him off enough to poison you? You should know better than to eat in the cafeteria." She chides him lightly.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty scowls.


Hey did I do something wrong?
I just can’t believe that I could be so badly mistaken
[OOC: Nope. Just thought I would see how much I could work Abba lyrics into a daily conversation. Don't eat the PBJ sandwiches either]

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

"I guess you couldn't escape if you wanted to." She giggles. "Will it wear off? Or should I bring you to the clinic? I think Wilson is in; he may know how to treat you. This is a new one, for me. I mean, you seem okay, otherwise."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty sighs and waves his hand to say he'll deal. He starts to pack up his things.


Holy christ what a lousy deal
Now I’m sick and tired of your tedious ways
And I ain’t gonna take it no more
Oh, no no, walking out that door


Marty sighs again and makes a motion to show that he does not find Cuddy tedious. If there is such a motion.

[12parseckessel.livejournal.com]

"Cal and Jake ran for it. Your buddy is singing too much to help, and the others are just stunned. You wanna help me call Rover or something? Coach really needs to be bounced into Spider's office."

[lisacuddy.livejournal.com]

"I feel bad doing that to Spider, but yeah, I'll hang here and keep an eye on things. Go inform... someone, before he ends up terrorizing the entire student body with his... yeah, go get help."

[12parseckessel.livejournal.com]

"Help is on the way."

WIth that, Han gets up and leaves to make a call to The Rover.