Culture Shock, Thursday, 5/28, Period 2

[shiroi_tiger]

When the students filed into the danger shop today, they'd find themselves stepping into a wooded area that vaguely resembled the preserve. Algren was standing between two trees with his arms crossed over his chest, and a frown very apparent on his lips. He enjoyed teaching classes outside, damn it. Being in the danger shop, conveniently away from whatever the hell those creatures outside were supposed to be, hardly counted at all.

"It's good to see that you've made it here in one piece," he greeted the students with. "And if you aren't in one piece, you shouldn't be here. If your injuries are severe, grab a well-armed posse and get yourselves to the clinic. If you figure it can wait, I'll escort you there myself after class."

That out of the way, he finally began to launch into the lecture.

"And on the off-chance that you haven't noticed, Fandom Island has segued us very nicely into the 'frustration' portion of the syllabus. Just when you start to work on settling in, something inevitably crawls out of the woodwork... or out of the sewers to throw you for a loop. What do you do when you're faced with the completely unexpected while you're trying to adjust to a new environment?"

At that very moment, unnoticed by Algren, a tiny green creature made its way up to him, put a tiny green finger to his slimy green lips as he grinned at the class, and then proceeded to take a large bite out of Algren's ankle. It then gave a little, gremlinny laugh, turned, and ran away to fiddle with the Danger Shop settings.

There was a long stream of language that was in no way suitable for a teaching environment before Algren finally settled down. At about the same time, from out of the shadows behind him, a swarm of crocodiles began to emerge. They were smaller than the alligators who were lurking outside, yes, but they were still big, hungry reptiles.

Immediately, Algren dropped to his hands and knees and began to sneak up to the nearest one.

"Crikey! Would you look at the size of this croc?" Between Algren's horrid approximation of an Australian accent and the bad dangershopped khakis, this could not possibly end well.

[ETA: The alligators are tomorrow! And I am facepalming. If Y'all would be so kind as to pretend that Algren's crazy is a result of the gremlin bite and the danger shop combined, I would kinda love you all forever. Thanks! (Maybe he was bitten a first time before he came in, and he's building up an immunity?)]

Comments

Sign In [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

Crikey!

Re: Sign In [5/28]

[glacial_queen]

Karla

Re: Sign In [5/28]

[bigdamndestiny.livejournal.com]

Merlin

Re: Sign In [5/28]

[bitchprince]

Arthur Pendragon

The Lecture [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

Such as it is. Perhaps it would be best spent at a safe distance from the temporarily insane man who is sticking his hand in the mouths of danger-shop crocodiles who, fortunately, do not puke killer goldfish.

Re: The Lecture [5/28]

[glacial_queen]

Hellfires, Mother Night, and may the Darkness be merciful. Karla was already on edge today, and whatever the hell was going on wasn't making it better. She scuttled to the back of the Danger Shop with uncharacteristic timidity, wondering if she could sneak out without anyone noticing.

Re: The Lecture [5/28]

[saikyou-no.livejournal.com]

"Excuse me." Kenshin had never spoken with her, but she looked worried, and... Well, she was a woman, and men were supposed to look after women.

"It might be safer up a tree."

Which was the best he could do without his sword.

Re: The Lecture [5/28]

[glacial_queen]

Usually, Karla would have a comment about overprotective males and just where they could go. Then again, Karla usually wasn't the timid, cowering type. But instead of making acid remarks, she just flinched away, not from the roaming alligators, but from him. "I--" she croaked, "Please--"

And then simply took his advice, practically flinging herself into a nearby tree, occasionally peering down like a terrified monkey.

Re: The Lecture [5/28]

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine would be watching from the safety of the nearest tree, thank you.

Yes, despite the fact that she was wearing a skirt. Watching her scramble up to a sturdy branch was probably entertaining. For someone.

Re: The Lecture [5/28]

[nevertobequeen.livejournal.com]

While Morgana hated to be a girl about some things, watching her teacher seemingly lose his mind was enough to keep her as far away from him as possible.

The Activity [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

"Alright, everyone, gather in close. Today we're going to feed one of these beautiful creatures. Now, the thing to remember when dealing with these animals is that they're wild, and they're very unpredictable. So, stay behind me, and don't make any sudden moves. I've been working with these animals for my entire li- Whoa, big fellah!"

Yes. This is the activity. Watch Algren get his hand bitten into by a fake crocodile.

The facial expressions as he tries to pry it from his arm are fascinating.

... Actually, it would probably be for the best if you grab a slab of fake danger shop meat and try to distract the other fake crocs, who all want to eat you, instead.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[thatsamilkshake]

Francine. Tree. Not coming down. Possibly not until the hologram disappeared and she fell down.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[bitchprince]

Arthur had not only grabbed a slab of meat, he was rather enthusiastically kicking the odd crocodile in the face while he was at it.

What? It was what he did. Especially with Morgana in the class.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[saikyou-no.livejournal.com]

"Have you gone as crazy as our teacher?" Kenshin asked, from his perch in the tree.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[nevertobequeen.livejournal.com]

Morgana glanced over at Francine, and realized she had a good idea. She found a stump to stand on and gathered her skirt close to herself so that hopefully nothing could get to it. She wasn't sure if she'd make it through the whole class like this, but she was certainly going to try.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[bitchprince]

Arthur certainly wasn't hovering near her while he was fending off the crocodiles in a heroic and utterly necessary (his words) fashion. No. None of that.

Except that he kind of was. Well, her and Merlin. ... And Francine.

And every other woman in the class. But the two of them definitely got the most hovering.

Re: The Activity [5/28]

[formerbrat.livejournal.com]

Elspeth really regretted not wearing her sword to classes. Fortunately she still had her throwing daggers in hidden wrist sheaths. With a quick flick of her wrist, one of the spring-loaded sheaths dropped a blade into her hand.

Feeling a little better with a weapon in hand, she selected a slab of meat and threw it as far from herself and her classmates as she could, hoping to send the beasts in the other direction.

Talk to the TAs [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

They are probably more sane than the teacher is, today.

Re: Talk to the TAs [5/28]

[darkangelsawyer.livejournal.com]

Peyton was looking, well... more than a little horrified. But she was here. And wondering if part of her TA-ly duties involved saving the gremlin-bit teacher from himself somehow.

Re: Talk to the TAs [5/28]

[bitchprince]

Arthur had hoped that, after yesterday, whatever insanity had infected the people of Fandom would have faded (or, at least, the extra layer that they seemed to have acquired, up to and including his manservant).

After five minutes, he was painfully sure that was not yet in the cards, so he sat back and made his I'm surpressing commentary face rather expressively.

Talk to Steve Irwin [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

Algren looks ridiculous in the khaki shorts that the danger shop provided for him, yes.

OOC [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

Please excuse any brain-deadish errors, here, as I wrote this with a pounding humidity headache and I am certain that it shows. Whoever would have guessed that moving from what is technically a desert to a peninsula on the Atlantic coast would involve a change in humidity?

Hurrr.

Mod your reptiles, folks! If you need me, I'll be pondering the great mysteries of life. Like, if I tie balloons to my head, will it stop feeling like it weighs three-thousand pounds?

Re: OOC [5/28]

[once-a-traitor.livejournal.com]

Now I want to hear your approximation of an Australian accent!

Re: OOC [5/28]

[puppy_fair]

I imagine I am better at it than Algren, but now it is irreparably tweaked by East-Coastyness!

You'll have to come listen, sometime, and then laugh at me. :D

Re: OOC [5/28]

[shiroi_tiger]

Yep! I had a hurrr!

The full scoop is over here if you want it, but I can sum it up with "The gators are tomorrow, I goofed, please feel free to pretend that Algren is completely out of his head for the entire class."

And now if you need me, I'll be over here, facepalming and cowering in fear of precognitive gremlins.