Intergalactic Justice, Tuesday Period One

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

"Today, my little critters of learnitude, we finish our class with a GAUNTLET!"

Jim was appropriately gung-ho for the occasion. "This shop-- this DANGER SHOP has been set up with the defining laws of my universe. You must choose! Choose your weapons! Choose your enemy! And SAVE MY LOVELY BUTTERFINGERS OF JUSTICE!"

Jim coughed to clear his throat, then helpfully indicated the cardboard cut-out of an unusually attractive, bee-like woman all the way at the back of the Danger Shop. "Unfortunately," he continued, "My sidekick, Peter, couldn't be here today to give you the skinny on the second assignment. I will just have to take his place and hope the Great Worm Spirit forgives me!"

He held up a little cardboard mask of an anthromorphic dog up to his face. "Hi, class!" he said, in a high-pitched voice, "Fighting peril and righting wrongs in the galaxy is kind of a big, um, terrifying job, but it's really nothing compared to the dangers of, uh, haggis. See, haggis is... the heart... lungs... and liver... of a sheep... boiled in its own--"

Theatrically, Jim choked up a little. Then pulled the mask away from his face. "Sometimes," he said, with ceremony, "You just can't avoid haggis. Now! Get to it, my little chums!"

[ wait for the ocd up! ]

Comments

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

The whacking produced an interesting cardboard tear in Evil's ear.

He paused in his scratching to try and flatten it. "Now that's inconvenient."

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

Ino considered her options.

For a second or two.

Then took aim the best she could at the cat on her head, and making sure to angle it so it wouldn't hit her--danger shop or no, she wasn't quite that stupid--and pulled the trigger while the cat was hopefully distracted.

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

"YEE-ROOOWCH!"

Evil went soaring again.

And landed on all four paws. Again.

He was smoking a little this time, though. "Would you please stop that?"

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

"Give me a reason to stop," she said impishly, taking aim but not pulling the trigger yet.

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

Evil gave her a long, evil look.

Then raised a single, elegant claw to make her wait.

Then coughed up a giant hairball.

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

...

...

Ino couldn't help the giggle that slipped out. "That's a reason?"

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

"It's a hairball," he specified, wiping at his mouth. "Allergies."

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

"...so I shouldn't shoot you because you've got allergies?"

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

"And because it's terribly bad form."

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

"Oh, whatever," Ino said, rolling her eyes. "Mind if I go now then?"

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[notjustaworm.livejournal.com]

"Continue," Evil said, stalking back to his throne. "I have a ball of yarn that urgently needs my attention. A YARN BALL OF THE COSMOS, you might say."

Re: Pick an Opponent - Evil the Cat

[intraspective]

Okay? That? Totally deserved the one more shot with the blaster that she aimed at the cat, before she darted away.

Giggling.