Criminal Justice (As Taught By A Criminal) - Period 3 - Monday 02/11

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Today Deadpool was bouncy. For many reasons, but none of those were needed to be known by the wee students and their twisted little minds and stop picturing him naked, you sick sick little kids!

...ahem.

Anyway! He twirled a set of handcuffs gleefully, waiting for everyone to arrive. "Gooooood morning class! Today we have an exercise for you to do. And a very special guest to help demonstrate proper procedure." He glanced over at his wonder special crazy guest. "Isn't that right?"

"I can't believe I agreed to do this," Fraser said, looking stricken. "You'd better have a key, you'd better not leave me in this class by myself and this has no bearing on any...three letter thing."

Deadpool paused. "No, Benton, I doubt cats have anything to do with this class. And of course I have a key!" A beat. "Somewhere."

Fraser looked even more stricken. It wasn't that he hadn't used handcuffs lately, it was just those times had been... not with Deadpool. "If you ate it, I'm going to be very unpleasant to you."

Awww.

Deadpool made a note to congratulate him on not blushing.

"I didn't eat anything," He said, suddenly snapping a cuff on one of Fraser's wrists. "Well, I did, but it was edible and made of delicious pastry."

"Please, not too tight," Fraser said, trying not to whine but he was wary of Deadpool using handcuffs on him. Very wary. "And no tearing my uniform once I am handcuffed. I need this uniform as it's my only one right now."

"Benton, please. There are impressionable children present. You're giving them the wrong idea here." He grinned at the class, waving the cuffs-- and Fraser's wrist-- about. "You have two options here-- well, three, kinda. If you're mean. Cuff them up front, in back, oooooor---"

He kicked behind Fraser's knee to force him to his knees, pulling his cuffed hand up and bent over his head.

"--you can be mean!"

Fraser suppressed a wince at both the arm wrenching and the sudden floor underneath his knees. "Was that really necessary? You couldn't just ask me to get on my knees? I would have!"

...

"Yoooou might wanna rethink that, Benny."

"Don't call me that," Fraser groused, not seeing how what he'd said was so bad. "It would've been a polite courtesy to ask me to get on my knees. I would have, you would have said thank you and I would have said you're welcome and it would have saved me a sore arm."

Fraser needed to shut up.

Yes, yes he did.

"I'll get you kneepads next time, okay?" Wade replied, letting go of his arm and fishing for the keys. "But it was an excellent example, right kids?" A beat. "This is the part where you clap."

Fraser, still grumbling, was too polite not to clap. So, he clapped one hand against one thigh. "Bravo. An excellent demonstration of handcuffing skills."

"I like to think so," Deadpool said, finding a small ring of keys. "Now, I want all you to split up into teams of two and practice this. I have keys here and... I'm not exactly sure what key goes with what hand cuff, so... have fun!"

Squinting at the ring, he frowned. "Probably should start on you."

"I will stay here all day until you find the key," Fraser threatened. "I will go home with you if I have to. I am not leaving your sight until you find the key to this handcuff."

"Impressionable!" Wade shouted.

[[OOC: Please wait for the OCD is up!]]

Comments

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"Hi you," Ino greeted him cheerfully, "Wanna partner up?"

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Sure," Peter said. "Just promise to be gentle?"

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

Her eyes danced with laughter. "Oh," she teased, "I don't know about that..."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

Peter tried looking cute to see if that would help.

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"Nice try," Ino said, grinning, "but A.J.'s waaaay better at the looking adorable and pathetic than you are."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

Peter snapped his fingers with mock regret. "Oh well. Guess this is when I have the right to remain silent?"

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"If you really want to," she looked dubious, "I still don't think that whole spiel does anything but give people time to get away."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Nathan says you'd be surprised how useful it is," Peter told her. "Though usually because people ignore it. Makes his job easier."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"What's he do?" Ino asked, looking at the handcuffs. "Cop, or something?"

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"He worked for the DA's office back home," Peter said. Then, in case it needed clarifying, he added, "He's a lawyer."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"Oh," she shrugged, "those aren't in high demand back home. At least not in Konoha."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Around here you can't throw a brick without hitting one," Peter said. "Usually with another one showing up right away to handle the injury case."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"Nobody would ever get anything done if that happened back home," Ino said, looking amused, "ninja villages have a really high turnover of injuries."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"True," Peter said. "But you have to admit ninja lawyers would be cool."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"They'd have to be better than their clients," she said thoughtfully, "because otherwise, yeah, no. Most ninja aren't going to listen to a lawyer back home. It's pretty much fend for yourself, since the police force was annihilated, and obey Hokage-sama's rules."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Yeah," Peter said. "I can't imagine a lawyer would be much help there. Maybe after, when order's being restored."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"We've got the ANBU," she offered, "but you really don't want them coming after you. They're the black ops pretty much, so it's better I think just to figure it out before that."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"What's ANBU stand for?" Peter asked.

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"Ansatsu Senjutsu Tokushu Butai," Ino reeled off, the said, "or, in plain english, Special Assassination and Tactical Squad."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Don't exactly believe in beating around the bush, do they?" Peter said, quirking his eyebrows up. "Then again, I suppose that saves time."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"There's no mistaking what they are," she pointed out, "they're our dark side. Handling all the dirtiest jobs."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"My guess is not the ones involving sewers or animal poo," Peter said.

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"No," Ino said, looking serious, "they're the ones that Hokage-sama will send out if he gets a request to kill people, innocent people a lot of the time who just had the bad luck to get someone with money pissed off." She tugged at her hair, "That sort of thing. And, deep undercover operations where you'll be on your own, without backup, for a long while, or they're sent out if there's suspicion of a traitor. Dark jobs. Ones that warp you."

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[repeterpetrelli.livejournal.com]

"Sounds pretty rough," Peter said.

Re: Play with the Handcuffs!

[intraspective]

"I guess..." Ino shrugged, "It's just, you know, a part of how it is? Everyone knows what goes on, it's just not talked about. I'll probably wind up there eventually, my family normally does..."