fandomhigh | Library [02/04]

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library

Library [02/04]

Sam was back in the library again for his regular Monday shift, now that he didn't have to sit by anyone's side in the clinic. He was pretty sure he could go for a good long while without having to do that again, and was more than happy to have things back to normal.

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Dean cocked his head and looked at Sammy. "Do you really want me to stop bringing you lunch?"

"No, I don't want you to feel like you have to bring me lunch," Sam replied. "I want this to be something you do because you like to, not because you're feeling a sense of brotherly duty."

Dean frowned. "Can't it be both?"

"Maybe? But generally, a duty is something you don't want to do, but you do it anyway because you're supposed to," Sam said. "You know how much I hate being a job to you."

"You're my little brother -- of course it's my job to look out for you." Dean shook his head. "That doesn't mean I hate doing it."

Sam couldn't help but roll his eyes. "But it still makes me a job. Just like coming here and bringing me lunch is a job."

"So? Looking after Gracie's as much your job as mine. You saying you hate doing it or wish you didn't have to?"

"No, because I don't see looking after Grace as a job. Looking after Grace is something I do because I love her and I want her to be safe, not because I have to."

Dean's frown took on an edge of distress. "So... you think I don't want to look out for you? That I don't love you?"

"I think if Dad never ordered you to look after me that you wouldn't be nearly as obsessed about doing it," Sam replied.

"That's a load of BS," Dean said. "And you didn't answer the question. Do you think I don't love you?"

Sam sighed, and nearly rolled his eyes. "Of course you do, I'm your brother."

"But you think I only do because I have to."

"I meant what I said before. I think you want to look after me, just like I want to look after Grace. But I think you do a lot of what you do because you feel like you have to. Like how you worry that if you don't come here, I'll be too stupid to feed myself, so you have to do it."

Dean resisted the urge to facepalm. "Dude, the last thing I think you are is stupid."

"You just said a few minutes ago that if you didn't come by, you think I'd forget to eat," Sam said.

"Yeah, because you get too focused on what you're doing. You've always been like that."

"I managed to eat lunch before you started visiting me." Most of the time, at least.

Dean counted silently to ten and then asked, "Sammy, do you like me bringing you lunch?"

Sam sighed at the question, but nodded. "Yes. Not because I need the food, but because I like having a chance to eat with you."

"Then stop trying to get me quit," Dean told him. "I like eating with you too."

"I'm not trying to get you to quit. I just wanted to make sure you know you have the option of not coming in if you don't feel like it sometime," Sam said. "That way you won't stop liking it."

"Dude, I'm never going to stop liking hanging with you," Dean told him. This time the unspoken idiot was pretty loud and clear.

"Everyone stops liking things they have to do eventually. It's human nature," Sam said. "That's why I don't want to be a job to you."

"Don't tell me what my nature is, okay? It's my nature to be your big brother and everything that comes with it."

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