fandomhigh | Library [02/04]

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library

Library [02/04]

Sam was back in the library again for his regular Monday shift, now that he didn't have to sit by anyone's side in the clinic. He was pretty sure he could go for a good long while without having to do that again, and was more than happy to have things back to normal.

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"That's a load of BS," Dean said. "And you didn't answer the question. Do you think I don't love you?"

Sam sighed, and nearly rolled his eyes. "Of course you do, I'm your brother."

"But you think I only do because I have to."

"I meant what I said before. I think you want to look after me, just like I want to look after Grace. But I think you do a lot of what you do because you feel like you have to. Like how you worry that if you don't come here, I'll be too stupid to feed myself, so you have to do it."

Dean resisted the urge to facepalm. "Dude, the last thing I think you are is stupid."

"You just said a few minutes ago that if you didn't come by, you think I'd forget to eat," Sam said.

"Yeah, because you get too focused on what you're doing. You've always been like that."

"I managed to eat lunch before you started visiting me." Most of the time, at least.

Dean counted silently to ten and then asked, "Sammy, do you like me bringing you lunch?"

Sam sighed at the question, but nodded. "Yes. Not because I need the food, but because I like having a chance to eat with you."

"Then stop trying to get me quit," Dean told him. "I like eating with you too."

"I'm not trying to get you to quit. I just wanted to make sure you know you have the option of not coming in if you don't feel like it sometime," Sam said. "That way you won't stop liking it."

"Dude, I'm never going to stop liking hanging with you," Dean told him. This time the unspoken idiot was pretty loud and clear.

"Everyone stops liking things they have to do eventually. It's human nature," Sam said. "That's why I don't want to be a job to you."

"Don't tell me what my nature is, okay? It's my nature to be your big brother and everything that comes with it."

Sam didn't look fully convinced, but he nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry."

Dean nodded, then nudged at Sammy's foot under the table. "You want to tell me what brought on all this I can't possibly like acting like your brother thing?"

"I just get worried sometimes that you'll get tired of spending so much time with me, and then you won't want to be around at all," Sam said. "And I kind of can't afford to not have you at my back now."

"I'm always going to have your back, Sammy," Dean told him, holding his gaze. "And anyways, last I checked, I was the one that was all insecure about you leaving."

"I'm not as worried about you leaving as I am about you just...not caring anymore," Sam said.

Dean cocked his head. "Should I worry about you not caring about me anymore?"

"No, of course not. But you're not a job to me," Sam replied.

Dean shook his head. "I don't know where you got this idea, but it's crazy."

"You're the one who said it's your job to keep me safe," Sam said. "It's the word you keep using."

"Yeah and I love my job, okay?" Dean said. "I love you and it would kill me if anything happened to you."

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