fandomhigh | Comparative Religions--Monday, Period #3, Class #5

Vala was not in a good mood as the students entered, which might have something to do with her torn clothing, leaves and twigs in her hair, and general dirtiness. Or possibly with the fact that she'd missed the opportunity to chaperone Homecoming in a gorgeous dress because she'd spent the weekend up in a tree.

It was probably better not to ask.

"Today, we're studying Christianity, that most noble of religions whose first few generations of believers started off by being oppressed and brutalized and ostracized by both the Jews and the Romans, only to turn around and return the favor once they became the dominant religion on the planet. As with Judaism, this is a monotheistic religion, except for that there's discussion of the Holy Trinity, which is confusing because I thought a trinity was a combination of ingredients. I guess that goes to show you that you can't trust the Food Network."

"Anyway, I started getting confused and a headache, but I have a TA who will be more than happy to talk to you about Christianity while I have a few hundred ibuprofen. There are also copies of the New Testament to read and discuss, as well as a slightly less reverent look at the religion."

"Take it away, Sam. Also, large dogs are a deterrent to a free economy. That is all."

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Sam had a bit of a deer-in-headlights look as he went up to the front of the class, and may have thrown a glare or two in Vala's direction while she wasn't looking. "Uh, okay. So, I don't have any kind of formal education in Christianity, but I've studied it and I follow its guidelines as well as I can, so I'd be happy to answer any kind of questions you guys have to the best of my ability.

[Hit me with your best shot. I promise to be as unoffensive as possible. *g*]

Dean raised his hand.

Oh, this was going to be an unbearable day.

"Yes, Dean?"

"So this whole chastity thing... they can't really be serious about that, can they?"

Miraculously, Sam did not roll his eyes at Dean.

"Yes, they're completely serious. Being chaste keeps your soul pure, which makes you less likely to sin, which makes it easier for you to get into Heaven. It all ties together."

"Because of course, making someone else really really happy is a bad thing," Dean said deadpan.

"I know this might come as a surprise to you, but there are ways to make people really really happy without having sex with them."

"Yeah, but having sex does make people really really happy. I'm a results kinda guy."

"But you can get the same results with other things," Sam pointed out.

"Trust me Sammy," Dean said with a smirk, "not the same results."

This time, Sam did roll his eyes. "I'll take your word for that. The point is, you don't have to be chaste if you don't want to. But devout Christians do try to stay chaste, to stay closer to God. And yes, they take it seriously."

"There's a lot more important things in life to worry about than sex making you impure," Dean said. "Like, respecting your elders. Honouring your father and mother...."

Sam eyes narrowed just a little at that. "You're right, that is important. That's why it's one of the Commandments."

"So... that probably means a person shouldn't, oh, argue with their father over pretty much everything, huh?"

"No, they probably shouldn't," he admitted reluctantly.

"Yeah," Dean said with a firm nod. "And really, if you're gonna sin, sex is a lot more fun than arguing with the old man."

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"The nuns," Irulan asked, "do they hold some kind of power in the Christian church?"

Sam nodded. "Yes, they do. They don't hold as much power as men, because the Church is kind of stringently patriarchal, but they're usually responsible for the Christian education. In some Anglican sects, they're even allowed to give out Communion."

"It seems the more things change, the more they stay the same," Irulan observed, "more or less. So Christianity is basically a patriarchy."

"Yeah," Sam said, nodding. "The Bible was written at a time when pretty much every society on the planet was patriarchal. They went with what they knew best."

Adah didn't have any questions, but she certainly was peeking out from her head against the desk in her folded arms and listening with the utmost amusement. She was hoping for a trainwreck.

After he finished dealing with Dean, Sam happened to glance over at Adah, and saw her expression. He was glad at least one of them was enjoying the discussion.

Any attempts to appear apologetic in response to that glance from him failed spectacularly; Adah almost had to bite into her arm to keep from laughing. She did, however, feel...a little bad; it wasn't his fault that she reveled in seeing anyone attempting to rationalize this ridiculousness, but she was making up for seventeen years of wanting to respond like this. She was pretty sure she wouldn't have to worry about physical violence or the Verse from Sam.

"So, there's s'posed to be a whole bunch of different kinds of Christians, right?" asked Johnny. "What's the difference between 'em?"

"The difference is usually something small that one sect believes in that the others don't," Sam said. "Like whether the bread and wine is symbolic or transformed into something different by the priest, or whether or not the Virgin Mary stayed a virgin her whole life, or whether or not saints should be worshipped, that sort of thing."