fandomhigh | Redemption: What A Crock [Period 6, Monday]

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redemption

Redemption: What A Crock [Period 6, Monday]

After the class had assembled in the danger shop, Ares pointed to two lists of names. "I have, purely randomly of course, assigned you to two groups, the Wannabe Heroes, in search of redemption, and the Annoying Sidekicks, who will supposedly aid the Heroes on their quest."

"Now, today, you will choose your sidekick. Or more accurately, your sidekick will choose you, because they're annoying that way. Heroes, your job will be to try to dissuade your sidekick from following you around on your lonely quest for redemption, however actual physical force that would result in damage to your sidekick, while amusing to me, is not generally considered a good tactic. Sidekicks, you stick to your heroes like glue. Let nothing, not even physical force, stop you."

"Well, let's get started."

[ooc: ~~wait for~~ OCD is up!]

[Roster|Previous Classes]

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Interesting approach. "Oh, yeah? Why is that?"

"Well, you hero types are notorious for rushing headlong into dangerous situations with nothing going for you expect your overwhelming sense of entitlement and maybe a superpower or two. And while you'd think that the superpowers would be an advantage, heroes are usually too dependent on them. The arch-nemesis almost always has a way to nullify special abilities and the heroes are left relying on their little used brains," Rodney scoffed. "That's why they need someone who can do the heavy thinking for them and save them when they're trapped and without powers." Put like that, Rodney didn't mind the whole sidekick thing too much.

Dawn...actually couldn't argue too much with that logic, based on her own experiences. "But I don't have any superpowers or special abilities. What do I need you for?"

"Actually, that means you need me even more. Without any special abilities, you'll want to use advanced crime-fighting gadgets in order to gain an advantage over your enemies. I can build and fix the technology you'll require as well as diffuse any ticking time bombs that you will undoubtedly come across," Rodney said smugly. "Plus, even without powers, you're likely to become overconfident after facing a few easily defeated second string villains. You'll need me to keep you grounded for when the real challenges come along." Honestly, Rodney wasn't sure how anyone got along without him.

"Why do you want to be a sidekick?" Dawn asked, "It sounds like you're almost ideally suited to be a superhero. And, uh, how would this grounding happen?"

"It's true, I do seem like a perfect candidate for hero status," Rodney didn't know the meaning of humility. "But I'd rather stay out of the direct line of fire. My talents are much better suited for the behind the scenes acts of heroism. I'd be Prophet to your Ratguy." Rodney? Was a total geek.

"The grounding would most often take the form of me ~~loudly~~ logically pointing out your weaknesses, the enemies strengths and why you'd be stupid to act against them without a better plan, more time to prepare and my help. I'd also tell you the probable odds of your success, not to mention survival, if you acted without my help."

"They best analogy you could come up with is Ratguy?" Dawn scowled, having been well-educated in comics by Xander and Andrew (er, her Andrew, using a completely platonic definition of "her"). "I'm so Felinegirl."

She wasn't, but it was nice that she thought so. "Why would I want that? If I want people to tell me how wrong I am, I already have people to do that. Lots of people."

"Hey, you're the one who said you don't have superpowers; I just used the best known example of a superhero who doesn't have any either." Rodney was distracted from getting into a full-blown defense of his childhood hero by the sudden mental picture of Dawn in a Felinegirl costume.

He shook himself out of it. Mostly. "Yes. Well. Um, it would be in the form of constructive criticism, at least. I mean, if the fate of the world or whatnot were at stake I wouldn't stop you from saving it. What I would do is come up with a better, not to mention safer, way for you to do so. I'd be focusing my vast intellect on your safety and success. Seriously, you couldn't ask for a better asset than that."

"Okay, point, kinda," Dawn acknowledged, happily unaware of anything Rodney was mentally picturing, "and how fast a thinker are you? I mean, it's great to save the world with a better and safer plan, but if you don't come up with it until four hours after the deadline, it's no good, you know?"

She eyed him. "How are you at improv?"

"Oh, I'm a regular MacGadget," Rodney assured Dawn. "If there's a better solution possible, I'm the one who can find it in time. I'm a member of Mensa, you know." He may have puffed his chest out a bit at that.

"What's Mensa?" Dawn asked, oh-so-innocently.

Rodney gave her a look but answered anyway. He was practically incapable of not answering. "It's an international society of geniuses devoted to stimulating intellectual development."

ooc: I'm turning in but we can pick it up tomorrow afternoon if you want.

"Huh." Dawn considered that. "What's your best idea for a super gadget?"

[ooc: Night! Okay.]

"I'm actually working on the design for a personal shield device that would make the wearer invulnerable." Rodney thought that would be the perfect gadget for a hero without superpowers. "You could fight a villain stronger and faster than you and never risk getting hurt. Even if he had laser vision, you'd be completely protected."

"What about X-ray vision?" Dawn was trying very, very hard not to compare him with Warren, but it never hurt to check. "How do you feel about robots made to look like human girls? But, um, for sex purposes and to cater to every whim you have?"

"X-ray vision is okay, but it lacks universal applicability. I mean, how often are you likely to save the day just by seeing through a wall? Not having to worry about getting injured, on the other hand, will always be a benefit."

Rodney stared at Dawn when she started talking about sex robots. He had no idea she was a lesbian. "Um, are you likely to want a fembot? Not that it wouldn't be totally hot and all, but don't you think that's a little bit creepy?"

"Oh, thank god, that was so the right answer," she beamed at him, enjoying the feeling of relief. "It's totally creepy, but I knew another guy who apparently isn't anything like you who made fembots and it was gross."

Satisfied with that, she said, "Okay, you can be my sidekick. Do you want a nickname, or should I just call you Rodney?"

Rodney was pleased to have gotten through the trick question successfully ~~and a little disappointed that Dawn might not be a lesbian~~.

"Wonderful! I promise I will make a great sidekick and no, no nickname necessary." He had known he would ace this assignment. "Unless you're using a pseudonym as the hero, in which case I suppose I'll have to have one as well."

"I don't need a psuedonym, I don't think," Dawn decided. "I'd keep looking around for someone else anyway. Besides, keeping a secret like that lasts about ten minutes with the people I know."

"Oh good. I didn't want to get stuck with something really lame. 'Rodney' has always worked out just fine for me." There was no way he was going to mention how hard it was to get certain people *cough*Jeannie*cough* to call him that.

"You never wanted to be like The Astrophysicist, or something like that?" Dawn asked. "It's not that catchy, but it'd be very descriptive."

"Well, Nobel Prize Winner would be good, but it's a bit of a mouthful. I think I'll do well when I become Doctor McKay. It has a nice ring to it."

Rodney regarded Dawn. "What about you? Anything you wanted to go by?"

Buffy. "No, not so much," she admitted, "I'm kinda boring for a superhero. Sorry about that."

"That's all right," he waved away Dawn's apology. "I'm not that good with names anyway so that's one less thing to worry about." Most of the time, he didn't even bother to learn names unless someone impressed him or he had to deal with them a lot.

"So, oh sidekick mine, I have another question for you, and this is really really important." She paused, and gave him a very serious look. "What do you like on your pizza? And what's your favorite kind of doughnut?"

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