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fandomhigh2007-06-26 01:08 pm
sizzler-sisters.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2007-06-26 01:08 pm
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Tuesday, June 26 - Period 3 - Advanced Beginner's Guide to is anyone really reading this? Hi Mom!
"Welcome, welcome, welcome!" cried one Jerry, dancing around excitedly. He had Christmas lights around his housecoat and his wig was nearly falling off.
"Welcome to Introduction to Swimming and Boating for Beginners and Advanced Beginners!" said the other Jerry. He looked perfectly normal. Wherein "normal" is defined as "Jerry." So not normal at all.
"Welcome to Boating Safety for Canadians!"
"Welcome to Fire Safety for Albanians!"
"Welcome to Fire Alarms for Haitians!"
"Welcome to Alarming Science for Swedens!"
"Yes! We have science, Jerry! We brought it here for you!"
"Taste our science! Taste it!"
"This week, we shall study mating rituals of the porcupine!"
"This week, we shall make models of the Taj Mahal using only meat!"
"This week, we shall diagram the fall of the Roman Empire using spaghetti and an old toothbrush!"
"This week, we are going ... to the moon!"
The Jerries danced around singing atonally for a while. "The mooooooon, the mooooooon, we're going to the moooooon, the mooooooooooon."
Eventually, they stopped.
"All right, boys and girls and chickens and earworms!"
"All of you should grab a helmet!"
"All of you should grab a belt!"
"All of you should find your way to ... the moon travel chamber!"
In the center of the room were several milk crates.
"Yes! Yes! You must stand immediately in the moon travel chambers! With your helmets and belts! Or we shall never reach the moon, Jerry!"
Hurry up! You don't want to miss the moon, do you!?
(OCD, OCD, please wait for the OCD! The OCD is up, and the final Jerryclass is now in play. Do come in.)
"Welcome to Introduction to Swimming and Boating for Beginners and Advanced Beginners!" said the other Jerry. He looked perfectly normal. Wherein "normal" is defined as "Jerry." So not normal at all.
"Welcome to Boating Safety for Canadians!"
"Welcome to Fire Safety for Albanians!"
"Welcome to Fire Alarms for Haitians!"
"Welcome to Alarming Science for Swedens!"
"Yes! We have science, Jerry! We brought it here for you!"
"Taste our science! Taste it!"
"This week, we shall study mating rituals of the porcupine!"
"This week, we shall make models of the Taj Mahal using only meat!"
"This week, we shall diagram the fall of the Roman Empire using spaghetti and an old toothbrush!"
"This week, we are going ... to the moon!"
The Jerries danced around singing atonally for a while. "The mooooooon, the mooooooon, we're going to the moooooon, the mooooooooooon."
Eventually, they stopped.
"All right, boys and girls and chickens and earworms!"
"All of you should grab a helmet!"
"All of you should grab a belt!"
"All of you should find your way to ... the moon travel chamber!"
In the center of the room were several milk crates.
"Yes! Yes! You must stand immediately in the moon travel chambers! With your helmets and belts! Or we shall never reach the moon, Jerry!"
Hurry up! You don't want to miss the moon, do you!?
(
Scouting for Moon Rocks!
"Now!" one Jerry cries. "Find us moon rocks!"
"And moon pastries!"
"And moon scorpions!"
"And moon swordfish!"
"Do it now, Jerry!"
"For science!"
There appear to be plastic Easter eggs scattered around in the yard, containing who knows what.
Did the Jerries place them there? Does the moon grow plastic Easter Eggs with random junk in them? Are the Jerries really sane and having you all on in an elaborate performance? Did the Jerries put them there for reasons unknown and forget about it entirely until two seconds ago?
... Probably that last one.
Find some eggs, Jerry! Open them!