Dealing with Stupid People [Monday, June 25, 2nd period]

[professor-lyman.livejournal.com]

"Okay, people this is gonna be a...thing...so I recommend coffee. Lots of coffee."

Josh, personally, was on his sixth cup.

"For your final class, I wanted to present you with a challenge." There was a dangerous spark in his eyes. "So I found a couple of special guests. Ladies and gentlemen, the Jerries!"

He hissed to the class, "Ixnay on talk about the overnmentgay."

This...should be something.

Comments

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

"They drowned...and then ran away to join the circus?" Karal was beginning to suspect there was something not quite right about these two people. "That was, umm, very clever of them, and cruel of the government to drown your donkeys. Will the one in the basement be safe?"

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[sizzler-sisters.livejournal.com]

"We hope so, Jerry!" nodded one Jerry seriously.

"That's why we put the rats there!"

"That's why the pigeons aren't allowed there!"

"The pigeons will spy on us."

"They tell the mafia everything!"

"We borrow their wiretaps."

"Now we know all about the mafia!"

"That's why they're after us," said one Jerry sadly.

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

Sunlord, what is wrong with them? All Karal's diplomatic skills, all his training, abandoned him and he just stared. "...what?"

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[sizzler-sisters.livejournal.com]

"Shhhhhhhh!" cautioned one Jerry.

"They will hear you."

"That wouldn't do at all!"

"No, no, it wouldn't!"

"If the mafia's pigeons know that you're here," whispered one Jerry, "then they'll never allow you to bake those popsicles."

"We need them!"

"We need them for the fort, you see."

"They're our popsicles! Not yours!"

"Give them to us immediately, Jerry!"

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

All right. All right, he could do this. The name of the class had never seemed quite so accurate. "What if I bake the popsicles in secret? Then you could use them to bribe the mafia pigeons, and conceal the rest in the fort."

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[sizzler-sisters.livejournal.com]

"Very clever, Jerry!" One Jerry looked very happy with this idea.

"Yes, yes, indeed!"

"We can see why you were selected for this position."

"No wonder the government trusts you!"

"You aren't spying on us for the government, are you?!"

"The government sends the waves into our heads!"

"That's why we need our hats."

"The ones with orange slices!"

"Radio waves can't eat orange slices!"

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[vkandis-son.livejournal.com]

"Thank you," he replied modestly. "And no. I promise I am not spying on you for the government. Actually, the donkey sent me to help stop the waves. He says the orange slices aren't working any more, and you need to use sausages."

Re: Talk to the Guests!

[sizzler-sisters.livejournal.com]

"Ooooooooh!" Both Jerries drew back for a huddled conference.

Someone listening closely would probably only make out the words "confectionary", "stationary" and "auxiliary."

The Jerries came back, looking at Karal consideringly.

"Are the donkeys still mad about the flamingo incident?" one asked.