fandomhigh | Sexual Education [08/17]

"Hey, guys. Easy day today," Becky said. "We're eating."

She gestured to a table in front of her, where there was a rather odd assortment of foods.

"These? Are all considered natural aphrodisiacs by people," she told them. "Whether that's true or not seems to be a personal issue for every individual."

Becky indicated something vaguely yellow-brownish. " Any food that can make you sweat is thought to have aphrodisiacal effects 'cause they're kinda like sex. Think about it; spicy foods increase your heart rate, and make you all sweaty and red. Eat it in bed and you're golden, honest."

She moved over to something ~~kind of gross omg~~ slightly more known as an aphrodisiac. "Oysters. Who's surprised? I have no idea why these are supposedly aphrodisiacs, but they apparently are. Maybe it's 'cause of their texture. I'm not gonna explain that if you didn't get it."

Then Becky indicated a platter of rice and seaweed-wrapped somethings. "Sushi. Hurry up and eat this in case it's bad for it to be out, or something. What you really want to eat is this green stuff, which I am told is called "wassybee" or something. Anyway, ~~Miho~~ a Japanese friend of mine told me this stuff works."

"Vodka's one, too, but I can't give that to y'all 'cause I'm a teacher or something, and caviar is too, but there is no way in hell that I'm sharing the good stuff with you," Becky said. She then held up three little bottles. "Scents can be aphrodisiacs, too. We have vanilla, patchouli, and musk. Vanilla smells all girly, patchouli smells like the seventies, and musk smells like men."

"You're all free to try the food, or rub a little of the oils on your skin - probably behind your ears or on the insides of your wrists," she advised. "If they work, don't have sex in class where I can see you, and remember to wear a condom. Otherwise, go nuts, boys and girls."

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Nadia shook her head. "You're a . . . mime."

She hoped he wasn't contageous.

Blair bounced and grinned again. He looked around for Bel and pointed him out to Nadia.

"Bel turned you into a mime?! Is he evil again?"

Blair shook his head and stood up on tiptoes to mimic Bel, walked around in a circle and then pointed at his groin.

Then Blair bounced a little, fluffed his hair and made a shocked expression.

He was pretty sure that explained the whole situation in clear terms.

There were some things Nadia really, really didn't need to know.

She was starting to put things together in her head, though. Like Bel drinking for having kissed a guy . . . did he drink for sleeping with one, too?

"Madre del dios."

Just how many people was Bel sleeping with?! And was miming an STD?

Blair was sure Nadia understood about the bet and Bel trying to make him blush. It was nice that she was so upset about it too.

He pulled a plastic flower out of his pocket to give her.

Nadia wondered if Bel had remembered about her drinking to the threesomes question and asked him to get her into one.

This would take diplomacy. "Thank you, but no."

Blair wasn't sure why Nadia didn't want his flower. He pouted and tried handing it to her again.

He danced a little too.

I will not get into a threesome with a mime and a demon. I will not get into a threesome with a mime and a demon. I will not get into a threesome with a mime and a demon.

"No, seriously, Blair, I have a boyfriend."

Blair bounced happily. He held out his arm and draped an imaginary tea towel over it and bowed slightly to Nadia. Then he splayed out his fingers in a 'look at me shooting wires around like a wire-shooting thing' motion.

Finally he made a kissy face at Nadia and waited for her to make another suggestion for him to mime.

Okay, and now Blair was trying to tell her he could be Walter?

Right. Sorry, Blair, no dice.

"Bel has a girlfriend! Who's my friend, too!"

Blair nodded and jumped to one side, protraying a mermaidy Phoebe. Then he hopped back and mimed an emo Bel. He went back and forth between the swimming girl and the pleading demon before finally the mermaid stood up and the two embraced.

Or rather, Blair embraced himself.

He hooked up with Bel while Phoebe was a mermaid?!

Or he loved to love himself while going emo-swimming.

"You're a strange individual, Blair,"

Blair flashed her a peace sign and smiled. He pointed at Nadia as if to say, 'you too, man!'

How many times did she have to tell him she wasn't interested?

"No. For one thing, Walter would hurt you."

Blair frowned. He was pretty sure that Walter liked him but he wasn't sure how to convey that in mime.

He pretended to eat a sandwhich and then jumped around fanning his mouth for a moment. Then he held a silent conversation with himself and 'Walter' before giving himself a much more manly hug.

Okay, now Nadia was just confused. "Okay, Walter is definitely not coming, too. Neither of us. You and Bel can have your you and Bel thing."

Blair looked over at Bel and grinned. He danced around in a circle and mimed singing.

Well, at least Blair was happy. Nadia wondered if she'd have to do the brownie ritual for Phoebe.

"That's great, Blair, really."

Blair grinned and patted her on the back. It was nice that she understood.

Sexual Education [08/17] - Thursday Afternoon

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