fandomhigh | Relationship Skills, Friday Period 3

The classroom was set up with pillows instead of chairs or desks because the teachers preferred to be comfortable whilst bitching about certain people in their lives in order to teach the subject.

Also magic.

Also for the record, the teachers should never be allowed to do paperwork while alcohol was involved.

"Good morning," Yennefer said to the class, looking shockingly like someone who had the first clue what she was doing. It was a skill they taught at Aretuza. Also, was it still morning? She had no idea, and didn't care. "I am Yennefer of Vengerburg, and this is the bard Jaskier, and this is...Relationship Skills." After a beat, she added, rather quickly, "We are not in a relationship." The horror.

"Oh, goodness no," Jaskier said, making such a face. "But we do have quite a bit of experience with the worst relationship you could ask for. The same person, in fact. It's a thing, really."

"Yes, and what it's made us realize is that some people simply don't know how to be in relationships. Hence..." Yennefer gestured vaguely. "This workshop. So to start we'd like for everyone to introduce themselves and please tell us why you think you need better relationship skills." So they could judge you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

In a relationship

Sakaki

Billy Coen

Marc Spector (very much not in his own handwriting)

Yang Xiao Long

Isabela

Belle

Nell Ingram

No, your teachers did not escape from a Ren Faire.

As Yennefer and Jaskier started to talk, Marc blinked in confusion as though he'd only just come to awareness and realized where he was. Because yeah.

In his hand was a strip of paper with the class description. On it was a handwritten note saying "Have fun! - S" No prize for guessing if this was in the same handwriting as the thing calling itself Marc's signature on the class sign in.

"Steven, I'm going to kill you," Marc muttered.

Yes, there were a lot of layers involved in why that threat wouldn't work, up to and absolutely including that death wouldn't take. Don't hassle Marc with facts.

"We'll start with you," Yennefer declared, picking a victim at random.

Sakaki almost let out a little startled sound as the attention shifted to her, but, thankfully, managed to keep it in, but she was still blinking a little owlishly at everything.

"Ahhh..." she started, "...I'm Sakaki. I...am not very good...at talking to people."

So, you know, that answer probably did its job in painting the appropriate picture with this one.

"I see," Yennefer said. "Communication issues. That is definitely something we will be covering."

"Oh," said Sakaki.

Who then seemed to realize that this was part of the topic in question here.

"That's good," she continued, a moment later, and even managed to really push forward with some staggering progress by further adding, "I'm...looking forward to it."

"The important thing is putting in the effort," Yennefer assured her, then muttered to Jaskier, "Well, she's already better than Geralt."

"I'm Billy Coen," Billy said simply. "Might as well take the class and see if it helps. I've bene told I have trust issues. And I'm also not great at the idle chitchat thing."

Short. Sweet. And Demonstrative. Have fun!

And that was another one for communication issues, Yennefer supposed. "And by 'idle chitchat' do you mean actually talking to people about things at all?" She knew someone like that.

"More like talking for the sake of talking. How's the weather? Did you see the game last night? That sort of thing. If it's not important or valuable... seems a bit of a waste to me."

"Marc Spector," Marc said. "Can we skip ahead to that part of the class about respecting physical autonomy or whatever it was? And can you deliver that lecture as slowly and condescendingly as possible for those who really need to hear it?"

Like certain people you shared a body with who thought they were funny.

Edited 2022-07-08 17:24 (UTC)

Yennefer's eyebrows were inching toward her hairline. For one thing, that class description had been written after quite a lot of wine, so she didn't actually remember what it said, but, "Do you have difficulties respecting other people's physical autonomy, then? Because that is definitely something you should work on."

She might be giving a demonstration of exactly how condescending she could be, which was: extremely.

"I know someone else who needs to hear it," Marc said. "Today, in fact. Unlike some people I only ignore autonomy if it's going to get us killed."

Which was actually true, for the record.

Yennefer really did not know what to make of this. Marc thought he needed better relationship skills because someone else didn't respect his physical autonomy? Someone else in the workshop, presumably, which was...concerning.

"Someone in the workshop doesn't respect your physical autonomy?" she attempted to parse. "Do I need to turn them into a toad?" Or involve the police?

Edited 2022-07-08 18:02 (UTC)

"Tempting, but no," Marc said. There were some punishments even he wouldn't self inflict if it meant getting back at Steven. Which given the list of punishments to date he'd either threatened (the aforementioned killing) or done (punching in the face) was possibly impressive. "Anyway I'm fine. He's not here at the moment and my relationship status is good, thanks."

Edited 2022-07-08 18:05 (UTC)

"Yang Xiao Long," Yang said, looking really embarrassed at the fact she was there. She was going to kill her father for somehow signing her up for a class all the way from Signal. She was an adult, dammit.

"I have trust issues. For Reasons. And, um, a relationship that didn't end so great. Maybe two relationships that didn't end great? I'm not sure if the second one... anyway. One, I maybe coulda fixed but I... I just... it felt like there was an impossible canyon between us, and I wasn't able to make the jump."

She was distinctly looking down at her hands, yes, and not making eye contact with anyone in the room.

"Captain Isabela," she said with a bow and a flourish and a good old flash of the cleavage. "And I know exactly what I want out of a relationship."

Namely out of it before anyone thought it was serious.

"I'm Belle and I don't have much experience at all with relationships. I was betrothed at home but that was hardly my decision."

Whatever was going on with Five was not a relationship, obviously. And the weekend she'd been involved with him and Harry was a fluke!

"My name is Nell Ingram and I s'pose everyone could be better about relationship issues." She looked a bit uncertain. "I'm married, of course, but haven't been able to find my way back home since I arrived here."

Four years ago.

They're here.

In accordance with the prophecy.

Relationship Skills, Friday Period 3

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Talk to Your Teachers

OOC