fandomhigh | Sex Ed, Wednesday, January 15, 2020

"So leaping right into a discussion about interspecies relations was clearly a bit too advanced for many of you," Anakin began dryly, "so we'll take a few steps back. Hello. This is sexual education, a class devoted to having you understand your own body and its reactions so sexual simulation--and things that don't seem that sexual at all because at this stage in your development, males especially, many things seem sexual that aren't-- as well as learning what your partner-slash-partners are trying to communicate to you about their wants and desires."

All delivered to you by a glowering man in a robe. You lucky, lucky students.

He unfurled a pair of way too large, extremely detailed charts. "We'll begin with baseline human anatomy," he said, "but feel free to share with the class where you might be different."

Because that definitely sounded like something a teenager would do.

He then proceeded to go through each piece of anatomy in excruciating detail.

Finally: "Any questions?"

Other than "Please, can the Earth swallow me whole?," presumably.

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You know you want to.

"Why," stated Sidon, with that flashing gleam in his yellow eyes, the one that matched the sharpness of his grin all too disturbingly, "since it was brought up," you just had to bring it up, didn't you, Anakin?, "I would be more than happy to elucidate on the difference between human and Zora anatomy, if it would so please the class."

Oh, and wouldn't it just?

"Please do!" Anakin said, gesturing to the charts. "Is anything on these pictures remotely similar?"

"Oh," said Sidon brightly, "hardly even a little! Though you may be surprised to discover what actually is! Now, I may not have had such wonderful and detailed resources such as these incredibly magnificent charts...I certainly have never seen a cross-section of the Zora reproductive system, but I do actually possess one, and we do learn about it quite a bit as hatchlings!"

And while Sidon did not exactly have visual aids, the following, elaborate, and enthusiastic words certainly did paint quite the picture. He made certain in include all sorts of wonderful, florid details, leaving very little to the imagination, up to and including the answer to the question that might be lingering in everyone's mind about just how Sidon was able to go around without any clothes whatsoever and have it not be incredibly and obviously obscene.

And by the time he was finished, he had surely summarily made it very clear that anyone should be at least mildly terrified to ever actually engage in a deeply intimate relationship with any male Zora, much less the royal heir, who, he assured them all, was genetically disposed for certain...enhancements.

Or, hey, maybe not. No judgement here.

As soon as he said that, there may have been a muttered "God dammit."

She'd been able to think this was all clinical and just about horrifying diagrams till right now!

As someone who was skilled at, well, taking people apart, this was actually pretty fascinating to Grog. After staring at the pictures of the male side of things for a bit, he raised his hand. "Is it okay if, uh, some things aren't the same size as in those pictures?"

He'd somehow made it this far without seeing many other people naked, so he only had his own... well-proportioned people to compare things to.

"It's very okay," Anakin said. "They came in a variety of lengths and widths."

And now you all had to hear him say that.

Sex Ed, Wednesday, January 15, 2020

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