Sex Education, Wednesday, January 8, 2020

[sith_happened]

"I had an entire other class planned for today," Anakin announced as he stomped into the classroom still smelling like volcano even after many, many showers, "but recent events have changed my focus."

He wrote "CHOOSING SEXUAL PARTNERS FOR MUTUAL PLEASURE" in huge letters on the whiteboard in the front of the classroom, and glared at it, then at the students. "Or 'why we don't try to seduce goat demons who have kidnapped you.'"

That was a little judgmental, Anakin.

He stared at his board some more, then added "ENTHUSIASTIC CONSENT" underneath it.

So this should be a fun class for everyone.

"Right. Let's get started."

Comments

Discuss!

[sith_happened]

Is attempting to seduce your way out of a kidnapping sound tactics and Anakin's just no fun? Is he accidentally kink-shaming people who find Krampus super hot? What sorts of characteristics are you looking for in a sexual partner?

Re: Discuss!

[amitragic]

The unthinkable happened:

Ulysses actally put his hand up in class. "So, uh. I demonstrably already know not to, um, seduce goat demons," he said. "So can I skip this one?"

Because he just really wanted to get back to sleeping in his comfy bed, thanks. Holding classes the day after they'd been freed from a volcano was just madness, if you asked him.

Re: Discuss!

[sith_happened]

"You can absolutely skip this one," Anakin said.

Re: Discuss!

[amitragic]

Ulysses's eyebrows bounced up. "Really?" he asked. Look, you never knew with this school, but he was already standing up. "Well. See you next week."

Re: Discuss!

[sith_happened]

"Eat something that's not stale cookies, take a nap, and I'll see you next Wednesday," Anakin said.

Re: Discuss!

[overparented]

"Just... what?"

Help.

Re: Discuss!

[sith_happened]

"Which part?" Anakin asked.

Re: Discuss!

[overparented]

"All of it," Janet said. "You can pick literally any word you've said to start. Goat demon?"

Apparently you were starting there.

Re: Discuss!

[sith_happened]

"The thing that kidnapped all of the new people, me, and a handful of others," Anakin explained. "Apparently goes by Krampus."

Re: Discuss!

[grandpoobah]

Grog rarely understood what was happening on a good day, so he was just sort of staring in confusion at all of this. "Demons like, suck your souls out and do bad things. Seducing them sounds... not good?"

Re: Discuss!

[sith_happened]

"And you're already smarter than five people I've met," Anakin said with a dry smile.

Re: Discuss!

[midichlorianfail]

On the one hand, Theron conisdered flirting a completely valid tactic, on the other..."Uh, what?"

Re: Discuss!

[mylandmyrules]

"This is all just wrong," Nell said, looking vaguely or maybe more than vaguely, horrified. "How do people even discuss this or even think about these things?"