fandomhigh | Camp Shenanigans, Wednesday, June 5, 2019

"Good morning!" Anakin blared through the microphone. "An essential skill of a camper is the ability to feed yourself over a campfire--BEAKER, GET AWAY FROM THE CAMPFIRES."

There was slightly charred sounding apologetic meeping as Beaker moved away from one of the two campfires that had been carefully set up in the park. There were rickety looking folding tables arranged nearby the fires with cutting boards, knives, bowls, and other ~~moddable~~ kitchen items nearby. There was, however, no power. Everything would have to be chopped and grated and opened from a can by hand.

"Today, you will be paired up and asked to feature one of two different sets of menu items," Anakin continued. "And then you will present them to our esteemed panel of judges: Summer, Hannibal, Peebee, and Vette." He pointed to the judges. "Your meal must be cooked over the campfire. We have an array of other ingredients--" he pointed to a pantry and set of mini fridges that Beaker was now standing near, so expect that to spontaneously fall over any minute now, "--for you to use to supplement your original ingredients, but you must use the three ingredients we give you." He took a deep breath. "Please don't give the judges food poisoning, and remember that presentation matters. Listen for your names!"

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Vette, over at the Judge's table, just laughed a little and waved back. Hiii, Sidon.

Jono shrugged.

//Plenty of hot sauce,// he replied, //certainly. Maybe some Worcestershire sauce or something...//

It wasn't really hot, but it did have some bite to it. And besides, he wasn't the one who had to eat this.

"Worcestershire sauce?" Just when it seemed Sidon couldn't any more excited and thrilled, Jono had to go and lay that one on him. "Oh, what a fantastic name! Worcestershire! I've never heard of it before! Is it good? And, most importantly, is it spicy?"

//It's got plenty enough going on to be a noteworthy flavour,// Jono replied with a shrug. //The cloves give it some spice. And the vinegar... isn't spicy, but definitely adds some bite to it. We can add some chili powder to the whole thing too, if you think it isn't spicy enough.//

He tilted his head at Sidon.

//I'm afraid I won't be able to sample it myself before we pass it on to the judges. For what it's worth, my husband is one of them, too.//

This might end up being grounds for divorce.

"Oh! And my girlfriend is one of them, as well!"

Bet'cha couldn't guess which one, either, eh, Jono?

"I wonder if that should really actually disqualify us," he mused. "It hardly seems fair if we're going into this at a slight adventage in that respect, though I suppose it may be counterbalanced nicely by the fact that I can barely stomach most food that isn't fish and you are unable to consume them yourself. Also, I should like to think that our respective paramours would strive to remain dutifiully impartial and honest to the spirit of the competition rather than just merely playing favorites..."

There was a slight, thoughtful pause.

"And I can guarantee that I am no proper judge of 'spicy enough,' and, odds are, if I should find it too spicy, it is clearly very much not 'spicy enough."

Jono considered that a moment. And then shrugged.

//Then we'll add what I figure should be a decent amount. I'm not certain what your girlfriend's tolerance is, but I have some idea of Hannibal's.// A pause. //Even if he doesn't let me do a hell of a lot in his kitchen.//

That was gonna bite ya in the ass today, eh, Lecter?

"Oh," Sidon gushed eagerly, sounding incredibly proud about the whole thing, "it's incredible! I have yet to find a spicy sauce that can defeat her! And, believe me," he laughed, "I have tried! She is invincible!

"So with that in mind," he added, "perhaps we've best play to the level of your husband's spice tolerance, for his sake, if anything."

And, sure, Peebee and Summer, too, he supposed.

//I'm certain Hannibal will thank us for it,// Jono replied, wryly. //Even if your girlfriend might not.//

He looked over the ingredients thoughtfully. //But what else should we put into this. Some manner of vegetable, I suppose...//

Which wasn't necessarily the Jono way, but he imagined someone at the judges' stand would appreciate the occasional break from jellied tuna.

...This was not exactly Sidon's forte, either.

"Perhaps we could add...mushrooms?" he ventured, after taking a long moment trying to recall various vegetables and coming up with the one thing that he knew was abudant in Hyrule, at least, that they also had here, which wasn't even technically a vegetable.

... You know what? Jono wasn't even invested in winning this. He shrugged.

//Hell, why not. I'm certain there's a can of those in that pantry, too.//

Because of course he was pulling those mushrooms from a can. What kind of campfire cook did people take him for?

//And peas. I'm fairly certain peas in gelatin are some manner of tradition.//

"And far be it from us," said Sidon boldly, proudly, even though he had no idea what peas were but he would find them absolutely adorable, "to break from tradition! Is there anything we might add to it that could perhaps compliment the peanuts more? I rather feel as though they're sort of left out on their own in all of this..."

//Hmm, true,// Jono mused. //I suppose we could use the peanuts as more than a garnish. Maybe make some manner of sauce out of them. A... peanut glaze. Using more gelatin.//

You really were a monster, Jonothon.

Camp Shenanigans, Wednesday, June 5, 2019

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Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!

Re: Come on Down, Contestants of Group A!