fandomhigh | Advanced Journalism (Tuesday, March 21, 2006)

Johnny is very upset.

This snakeskin totally does not match his eyes. Curses.

Snakey slithers over to Jaye and wraps around her ankle.

"UM," says Jaye, loudly, and wide-eyed.

Rory took a picture with an ACTUAL camera.

Snakey might've just fallen in love with Jaye.

Aww. He twirls himself around Jaye's ankle and holds tight.

If Jaye knew the gay cowboy thing was actually happening, she might be a little worried about this falling in love thing.

"Um, he's not poisonous, right?" says Jaye. "And like, won't squeeze me to death?"

Snakey squeezes tighter and flitters his snakey tongue out to tease Jaye and maybe scare her.

"Hey, that pinches," she tells him.

"He's tiny," Rita said in a 'duh' voice.

"Don't say that, you'll hurt his self-esteem!"

[Going back to work now, woe!]

Snakey hears the annoying tones of the manly Skeeter creature and plots how to get her back.

Soon...he'll be a snake...on a motherfrickin' head!

Rita, bored, waved her wand and sent the airplane Rory had been playing with over to the snake and with a flick of her wand, there was a snake on a plane.

She traced her wand through the air, watching him glide through the air.

Snakey is a snake on a plane and he's had enough of this crap.

Of course, there's not many places to go when you're a tiny snake on an airplane so, when he passes something solid, he jumps.

He might've jumped ONTO to someone by accident...

Rory shrieked.

"Tiny snake on me omgwtf!"

Snakey is triumphant! He is a snake on a motherfricking head!

Time to nest! Snakey starts trying to burrow...

Rory flailed a bit. "John? Johnny. This is Rory. Get out of my hair. Please?"

Snakey really doesn't understand this and it's warm in there. So, he stays there and curls up into a snake ball.

Rory held her camera out and took a picture of herself with a snakey on her head, and offered up a wee jellybean snack.

Since snakes have no teeth, Snakey thinks jellybeans are a choking hazard.

So he hisses at the offered snack.

Rory was vaguely hurt.

"Would you like to go spend time with Professor Skeeter?" she asked.

If Snake John could talk, he would tell her that he didn't want to choke on a wee jelly bean but that he was very appreciative of the gesture.

And, of course he wants to go spend time with Professor Scooter.

Rory gently plucked him off her head, and set him down on Rita's desk.

Then she scurried back to her seat and picked up her camera.

SNAKE ON A MOTHERFUCKIN SKEETER DESK.

Johnny totally makes to slither onto her lap.

Rita glanced down at him.

"No," she said warningly.

Yeah right, like she can do worse to him. He's not a pet.

He totally slides into her lap and nestles there.

Rita wrinkled her nose, pulled him from her lap, and set him back on the desk.

"No," she said again.

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