Understanding American Holidays, Monday - 3rd Period

[imafuturist]

The classroom was pink. Very pink. And covered in hearts. Because it was time to teach about President's Day!

Okay, that wasn't true. In fact, your teachers might start ranting if they were on that holiday.

"Today we will be learning about Valentine's day. A holiday that, I think at least, more commercialized than Christmas," Tony said cheerfully.

"Which is saying something," Steve said dryly. "This is a day to celebrate being part of a romantic relationship."

"Which makes being single on the day so much fun," Tony added. "When you're young, the holiday involves giving people cards that probably have puns on them and some candy. When you get older it becomes a minefield of finding the perfect gifts for significant others."

And/or drinking alone with some ice cream.

"And when you're even older, a time to sit and contemplate the prospect of spending the rest of your life alone forever."

Steve was soooo cheerful on Valentine's Day. "Today we're going to give you a price list of everything that you, as teenagers, might want to get your significant other--candy, flowers, stuffed animals, dinner out, things like that. We've also given you 35 dollars in Monopoly money, so now you have to decide which things you'd buy and which you'd skip."

"Candy is always a good buy," Tony said, trying not to side-eye his teaching partner there. "If you get turned down, you can always eat the candy yourself."

"But make sure that candy is part of a balanced diet--" Steve shrugged. "I had to do a lot of public service announcements for kids when I first woke up."

Tony nodded along with that a bit helplessly. "Alright, come get your money and pick what you'll be buying for the holiday, kids. Keep in mind that you should always think about what your prospective or current partner actually likes rather than what the holiday tells you they should want, yeah?"

"Especially if you're going the puppy or kitten or pet eel route," Steve agreed.

"...pet eel?" Tony echoed, tilting his head in confusion.

He shrugged. "Trying to give non standard options."

Clearly Tony had been on the internet too much because that suggestion took a traumatizing turn in his head.

"Good rule is no pets and no tattoos," Tony replied. "Kiss of death to a relationship, getting their name inked on you."

"Personal experience?" Steve teased.

Tony tried not to laugh at that, shaking his head. "I don't know where you think I might be hiding a tattoo, Rogers." Then cleared his throat and looked back at the class. "Since this'll be our last class of the summer session, we brought some chocolates for you all to enjoy as well."

Comments

Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

Tony, for one, was enjoying his chocolates.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

Steve was also enjoying his chocolates, after checking the box to be sure they were Fair Trade.

He'd been Educated. By the internet.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

"I don't even know what I would get a tattoo of," Tony said, taking a seat next to him.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Socket wrench?" Steve suggested with a grin.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

"Socket wrench could work," Tony replied thoughtfully.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"In red and gold," Steve teased.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

"Right over my heart?" Tony shot back.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Well, there or the small of your back."

Steve, you troll.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

For that, Tony kicked at his ankle. "I am not getting a tramp stamp, Steve."

Maybe when he was young and naive still...

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Is that what they're called?" Steve asked, giving Tony the big blue eyes of "oh, gee, I'm so old and yet naive."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

Steve, you absolute little shit.

"That's what they're called. I was under the impression you're supposed to get your name tattooed there so the person you're sleeping with remembers what to say," Tony replied, stealing a piece of Steve's chocolate. "But I don't think I'll have that problem anytime soon."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Planning on joining the priesthood?" Steve asked, frowning at his emptying pile of chocolates.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

Well, now he was going to enjoy the chocolate extra.

"Ouch. Though I'm sure I'd look good in that collar."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Pretty sure I found a photoshopped picture of you wearing one," Steve muttered.

And yeah, he'd looked good.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

"Oh god, please don't look at photoshops or fanart," Tony said, groaning at the thought.

It only ended in tears. Sometimes of laughter.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"I think JARVIS has a filter," Steve said.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

"It's good for sanity," Tony assured him. He even kindly offered from his box of chocolates. "And keeping you from threatening to punch someone."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

Steve's cheeks went pink. "They deserved it. Don't think they believed it was really me, anyway."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[imafuturist]

Tony shook his head, laughing quietly. "You have some very aggressive fans out there, sunshine."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Captain Rogers?"

Summer had come into class today carrying a platter with a large bowl turned over to cover what was on it, so you knew this was going to be....interesting

For the briefest of moments, she wore sn apologetic look. Blink and you missed it, leaving only a poor attempt to hold back a grin in its wake.

"Since you've been such a big part in creating this new culinary creativity within me, I felt it was only appropriate to give you the first of my current run of thematic masterpieces."

And under that makeshift cloche, Steve would find Summer's first shark jello monstrosity. Since she'd only gotten thr shark meat (frozen, too!) from Kanan that morning, she didn't have time to let it set in a proper mold. So she just took a bunch of jello snack packs of various colors and flavors and somehow merged them all together, some of the edges retaining the shape of their original cups, and then...infused the little bits of shark meat (still probably frozen) into it, with some pineapple rings and marachino cherries.

"I hope you like it!"

Pause.

"It's shark meat, if you couldn't tell."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"Wow, it's a...vision," Steve said with a pleased smile. "Will it be okay if I share it with Mr. Stark?"

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Oh, of course!" Summer said. "Shark meat is pretty hearty, after all, and I don't imagine it'll stay good for long."

Plus...she used a lot of snack packs for this.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

"We'll have it for dinner tonight," Steve promised.

Tony would be ecstatic.

"Thank you, Summer."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[somethingwithturquoise]

"Oh, no, no," said Summer, "thank you. Without your inspiration, this might not have ever, ever happened."

The other recipients of the others shark jello creations she was planning were sure to be thankful, too.

"And," she added, since she felt a weird swelling of pride over the whole thing, "you're welcome."

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[heroic_jawline]

Steve smiled earnestly at her. "You've got a real eye for seeing something unusual in ordinary stuff," he said. "That's important."