fandomhigh | Understanding American Holidays, Monday

The classroom was pink. Very pink. And covered in hearts. Because it was time to teach about President's Day!

Okay, that wasn't true. In fact, your teachers might start ranting if they were on that holiday.

"Today we will be learning about Valentine's day. A holiday that, I think at least, more commercialized than Christmas," Tony said cheerfully.

"Which is saying something," Steve said dryly. "This is a day to celebrate being part of a romantic relationship."

"Which makes being single on the day so much fun," Tony added. "When you're young, the holiday involves giving people cards that probably have puns on them and some candy. When you get older it becomes a minefield of finding the perfect gifts for significant others."

And/or drinking alone with some ice cream.

"And when you're even older, a time to sit and contemplate the prospect of spending the rest of your life alone forever."

Steve was soooo cheerful on Valentine's Day. "Today we're going to give you a price list of everything that you, as teenagers, might want to get your significant other--candy, flowers, stuffed animals, dinner out, things like that. We've also given you 35 dollars in Monopoly money, so now you have to decide which things you'd buy and which you'd skip."

"Candy is always a good buy," Tony said, trying not to side-eye his teaching partner there. "If you get turned down, you can always eat the candy yourself."

"But make sure that candy is part of a balanced diet--" Steve shrugged. "I had to do a lot of public service announcements for kids when I first woke up."

Tony nodded along with that a bit helplessly. "Alright, come get your money and pick what you'll be buying for the holiday, kids. Keep in mind that you should always think about what your prospective or current partner actually likes rather than what the holiday tells you they should want, yeah?"

"Especially if you're going the puppy or kitten or pet eel route," Steve agreed.

"...pet eel?" Tony echoed, tilting his head in confusion.

He shrugged. "Trying to give non standard options."

Clearly Tony had been on the internet too much because that suggestion took a traumatizing turn in his head.

"Good rule is no pets and no tattoos," Tony replied. "Kiss of death to a relationship, getting their name inked on you."

"Personal experience?" Steve teased.

Tony tried not to laugh at that, shaking his head. "I don't know where you think I might be hiding a tattoo, Rogers." Then cleared his throat and looked back at the class. "Since this'll be our last class of the summer session, we brought some chocolates for you all to enjoy as well."

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"You either created new villains or gained more people asking you to marry them," Tony said. "You know, I've never seen detention outside of TV and movies."

"Me either," Steve said. "I didn't get in that kind of trouble at school. We waited until after school."

"And then did something detention worthy, huh?" This was his surprised face. Honest.

Steve laughed. "Well, yeah. Couldn't just let those comments slide, could I?"

"Someone who wasn't you could," Tony replied. Because he was the guy who would let so much slide about himself, but go off at anything aimed at others.

"If you start running, they never let you stop," Steve replied.

Tony hummed at that, not an agreement or disagreement. "I didn't say to run away."

"I'd tell 'em to stop it, then they'd start swinging," Steve said with a shrug. "Middle schoolers weren't really into verbal debate."

"Most people aren't," Tony said with a smile that wasn't entirely genuine. "Don't get me wrong. I was hardly a pacifist, but... I learned to pick my battles."

"Why?" Steve asked, honestly interested.

Yeah, Tony had to chuckle at that. "You met Howard, right?"

Steve nodded. "Never punched him," he said.

Kinda wanted to now, based on Tony's oblique commentary.

"Peggy said she did, though. Dropped him into the Thames."

"And that is why she is my favorite World War II vet," Tony said, nudging at Steve's foot with his own. "I learned how to smile in the face of people who would happily see me fall. Kept my company afloat after I stopped making weapons."

The fact that he didn't really consider that a little messed up was... well, a little messed up.

Steve replied by bumping into Tony's shoulder with his. "I would have been terrible at all of that."

"The worst," Tony agreed with a laugh, bumping him back. "But that's not you. I wouldn't want you to do that. You are... still honestly who I wish I could be. Do you know how much I would have loved to deck one of those guys?"

Steve turned bright red at the compliment. "You show more restraint than I do."

In some areas. Cough.

Shhhh. Shhhhh. No need to mention those areas.

"Yeah, that's why you keep me around," Tony said stretching his arms over his head. "Like a one-two punch."

"I keep you around for other reasons, too," Steve said.

"Aww, flatterer," Tony teased because lol emotions and shit.

"Maybe," Steve said, blushing a bit. "You don't get sincere compliments enough."

He was a giver of those! Big ol' giver like that.

And hey, you managed to make Tony actually look a little flustered about it, Steve. That was an accomplishment. "You'll give me a big head."

Steve gave him an earnest smile. "Not likely."

Totally not helping with the whole flustered thing there.

Tony glanced away, shoving the last of his chocolate at Steve's chest oh so smoothly. It wasn't fair, earnest behavior was basically his kryptonite.

Steve grinned. "Thanks, Tony."

Understanding American Holidays, Monday - 3rd Period

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