fandomhigh | How To Get By In A Hostile World, Wednesday

"As some of you might have noticed last week," Atton said, "Fandom weird has a habit of following people around no matter where they are. My TA - also known as the guy with the dumb hair over there - thought maybe it was a good idea to spend some time strategizing how to deal with that. I mean, on a school trip, nobody's going to care because you won't see them again anyway, but if you're going to normal Earth college after this or whatever, it'll be a pain in the ass."

Coincidentally, he was teaching this in one of the normal classrooms this morning. Thinking ahead, and everything.

He walked up to the board and wrote down PROBLEM | SOLUTION.

"Sure, you could come up with stuff on the spot and handle it as it comes," he said, "But hey, sometimes it's easier if you plan these things out in advance. Take genderswap, for example."

He dutifully jotted down genderswap, then pulled a face. "...Okay, Sparks, you handle the writing from here on in." He tossed the marker in Sparkle's general direction. There. That was solved. "Genderswap," he repeated. "Also known as the process of the island turning you into another gender than the one you're accustomed to. Now, sure, you can lock yourself up in your room for the day, but that's a pain in the ass. There are, however, a couple of ways you can set things up so this is easier when the time comes."

"If you're going to college after this, it's probably the easiest," he added. "Just tell everyone you have a sibling people rarely see, if ever. Or a cousin, if you're worried your family is gonna show up and muddle things up. Another option, if you're comfortable with that, is just convincing everyone that every once in a while you like to mess with the way you present yourself. Or say you have a booty call. Or... well, the list goes on. Plant these seeds before the day comes, and you'll save yourself a whole lot of stupid on-the-spot lying you haven't actually had the time to think through."

He sat down. "Now, turning into a pony-- that one's a little harder. Might have to work to make sure that you know all the exits to wherever you wind up. Make sure there's a back door, if you're in a position where you can do that. Or do the thing you do with the genderswap thing and just say sometimes you like to play dress up. Sure, people'll think you're a little weird, but you can just cover it up later by saying there was a convention." Beat. "Or make sure you live alone, or room with people who do drugs regularly. Actually, that last one's probably the easiest on everyone."

Thanks, Atton. Sound life advice right there.

"Bringing this back to last weekend," he said, "the luggage-- that one's actually pretty easy. Take the day off. Make sure that whatever place you're in, it has enough room to house the luggage. Prep a story about getting a bunch of novelty bags by error - maybe push it off on those neighbors you don't like. Or make it an excuse to plan a vacation."

He shrugged. "Anyway, there's about a million of these things that can follow you around," he said, "I think it's time we put our heads together, put as much of them on the board as we can, and brainstorm up some solutions."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Dealing with weird.

THE HEDGEHOG WITH TH-- er, Sparkle

Karina Lyle

Garik Loran

Kaylin Neya

Atton isn't just dumping you in a winter wonderland this time, but actually has something to say. Le shock.

(It should probably not be a shock that lying is his solution for everything.)

Put your potential problems on the board.

PROBLEM	SOLUTION
1. GENDERSWAP	MAKE UP SIBLING, PRESENTATION
2. PONIES	MAKE UP COSPLAY HABIT
3. BAGGAGE	TAKE A DAY OFF

... and then discuss.

Edited 2014-10-15 08:31 (UTC)

"So, what about-" And since Sparkle was already up there, he was writing this one down himself, "turning into a kid?"

4. TURNING INTO A KID

"I mean, most of us aren't even aware that we're not supposed to be a kid when it happens. We're just, like, us. As kids. And whatever that entails."

"Make up a story about a wannabe-runaway baby cousin and baby-proof your room?" Atton said. "There's locks you can use that only adults can open, right?"

"You kidding? I was opening child-proof doors when I was four," Sparkle scoffed. "And anyway, I've climbed out windows and shit before to get out of a place where I'm trapped." Which he was not elaborating on in front of the class today, no. "Not to mention, someone hears a scared kid screaming in a room where there's not supposed to be a kid, they're going to come looking."

Plus, the whole 'baby cousin' thing didn't work terribly well when it was the job of the person you were living with to actually know your family history.

See, Sparkle, that's why you had to make like Atton and just make up an identity entirely from scratch. Meant you could lie about just about anything.

... Teacher, responsible adult, blah blah.

"All right, fine, so that wouldn't work," he granted. "I don't have a lot of experience with kids. Maybe someone should set up a Fandom daycare, or something, check in on all the alums."

"What, like, get a sort of neighbourhood watch thing together where people phone up alumni on weird weekends to make sure they're not five-year-olds in need of rescue?"

... That actually sounded like a good idea.

"Exactly," Atton said. "Then those people can pose as parents or responsible adults or whatever if they have to."

He would opt out.

Re: The Board

myownface - 2014-10-15 17:12 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 17:25 (UTC) - Expand

Yeah, so, Karina didn't exactly tend to contribute to class much, and she wasn't planning on putting anything up on the board, but--

"Hasn't anyone just found a way to stop the weird from following people?"

That'd be nice, right? Yeah, that'd be nice.

"Not so far, or we wouldn't be talking about it," Atton said. He shrugged. "But hey, if you know a guy..."

"I don't even know half of you people," Karina said dryly, not sounding bothered by that fact so much as disgruntled that she didn't know a guy who could fix this.

Atton shrugged. "It was worth a shot," he said. "Still trying to figure out how to get out of turning into a pony on island, honestly."

Who will as of now be known as 'THE HEDGEHOG WITH THE MARKER' to... no one but Atton, probably.

Ha! Look at Sparkle, being a contributing member of society or something!

Having the marker counted. Stand in awe, puny fools.

"Catch!"

Guess who'd figured out - only by almost the end of class - that he had more than one marker? Yep.

Guess who had maybe a lot of confidence in Sparkle's catching abilities?

Also yep.

Guess who was getting a marker to the side of the head?

Yep.

"Jeeze! Bit more of a heads-up there?"

Sparkle didn't seem to mind too much.

"Maybe you gotta learn to pay a little more attention, spiky!" Atton shot back.

'Course, he could also stop throwing markers at Sparkle, but where was the fun in that?

"Maybe if you'd stop hitting me in the head, I'd have better reflexes," Sparkle countered.

... And then threw both of his markers back at Atton.

Re: Talk to the TA

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 20:43 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 20:50 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 20:57 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:01 (UTC) - Expand

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myownface - 2014-10-15 21:16 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:18 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:20 (UTC) - Expand

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suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:32 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:36 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:39 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:45 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:47 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:50 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:51 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 21:53 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-15 21:55 (UTC) - Expand

myownface - 2014-10-15 22:22 (UTC) - Expand

suitably_heroic - 2014-10-16 06:23 (UTC) - Expand

Who's now known as 'That Dude Who Got Enough Food Stuck In His Beard That He Decided To Trim It Back To A More Manageable Size'.

I feel you, Edward.

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The Board

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Talk to the TA

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Talk to the Teacher

OOC