fandomhigh | How to be a Hired Gun

How to be a Hired Gun

Jayne had recieved another round of memos from the office this week, once again filled with helpful suggestions for his class. One suggestion was that instead of scenarios where they were shot at the first week that introductions be made instead.

So Jayne sent out a wave to everyone to meet at the shooting range this week and to bring their favorite weapon.

"You all were... Adequate at not getting shot last week. Except for the kid who was taking pictures of himself and rescuing the turtle. You ain't right in the head."

Which only began to describe Loki.

"I was told that shooting at ya was not 'appropriate' and that introductions should be made. Fine."

He pulled up a very large rifle to display to the entire class.

"This is Vera. Got it off a man who tried to kill me with it. Now show me yours and tell me about your weapon of choice."

We'll at least you don't have to talk about yourself this week kids.

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Armed

Edward Kenway

Sparkle

Eleanor Lamb

Garik Loran

Raven Darkholme

Mara Jade

Such as it is...

Ooooooh that was a gun. That right there, thaaaaat was a gun. And not even a little gun. That gun, it was a big gun.

Which, Sparkle supposed, probably went without saying, what with this being the freaking hired gun class and everything. But Jesus Christ on a cracker that was a gun.

Just about your favorite weapon. Jayne won't remember your name anyway.

"This isn't some kind of ploy in order to get us to show off our weapons so you can confiscate them for the school administration, is it?"

Because there were rules about that kind of thing. If Sparkle had known he was supposed to bring a gun to class, he might have asked Atton if he could borrow a blaster or something.

"Why would I do that?" Jayne asked all confused-like. "Doesn't seem fair to take away someone else's gun. Unless I shot them for it."

Yuuuuuuup. The teacher shot people.

Which again, fucking obvious considering the class, but it did help put shit into perspective about this place, didn't it?

"There's a school rule against students having weapons on the grounds," Sparkle shared, a roll of his eyes and a snarky tone saying just what he thought about that on a fucked-up island like this one. "We can't even take them into the fucking dorms. There's a weapons locker we're supposed to check 'em into, keep 'em all safe and sound and out of, like, irresponsible teenage hands or whatever."

"Even in the shooting range?" Jayne said looking around at the targets and everything. "Weird."

Then again that just summed up the island for Jayne.

"Well, no," Sparkle muttered. "Not even in the shooting range."

But Sparkle had trust issues. Allll kinds of trust issues.

"I don't have a gun," he added, "but a friend showed me how to shoot and I've killed a psycho fucker who was talking about eating me with one before. The range has ones to borrow. Can I grab one of those?"

"I didn't bring it to class," Eleanor said. "But I have a long skewer I attach to one arm. I use it to run people through."

"You don't have something you can shoot with?" Jayne asked.

Weird.

"You named your gun," Raven said.

Because that was definitely the important thing about this class.

Jayne shrugged and cradled his gun in his arms. "Are you saying she doesn't deserve a name?"

"'She' is a gun." Raven had occasional trouble anthropomorphizing actual people. "It doesn't even have a face on it."

"People name spaceships too," Jayne huffed defensively. "They don't have faces."

"I'm pretty sure that's to differentiate them from other spaceships," Raven said. That was how it worked in the navy in her world, she was reasonably sure. "Do you have so many guns that you have to name them to tell them apart?"

. . . Okay, so she had to admit that with this guy, that was entirely possible.

"I don't name all of them," Jayne grumped. "They're not all special."

Raven rolled her eyes. "Oh, okay. It's 'cause she's special."

"Don't go sassing Vera!" Jayne warned. "And while we're at it where did you go last week? Class wasn't over and you took off!"

Nope. Still didn't realize she was a turtle.

"You were shooting at us," Raven said. "I took evasive maneuvers."

By turning into a tortoise, thank you.

"I didn't shoot anything. Bad guys did," Jayne said wagging his finger. "And your evasive maneuvers was to leave the class."

"Was not," Raven said. "And even if they were, wouldn't that be pretty evasive?"

Jayne opened his mouth to argue and then realized her argument was better than his.

"I've got my eye on you!" he declared after pausing a moment or two to think of a response.

Raven smirked. "I'll keep that in mind."

Maybe she'd show up to class one day as him. See how his brain exploded.

How'd that be for 'evasive'.

"This," Face gestured to his face. "is the Face."

He mightn't have been taking this class entirely seriously, but considering how much damage Imperial propaganda had used it for was the closest thing he had to a weapon on him...because who brought a gun to class, Jayne? Who?

Jayne took a long look at Face's face.

"And it can kill people?"

Well River could kill people with her mind. It was a valid question.

In Jayne's head anyway.

"Yes." Metaphorically, at least.

"How? By looking at people funny?"

Because he was just that pretty. "It's classified."

"Not very classified if you told me what it already was," Jayne grunted out.

"It's the how that's need to know, not the what," Face said. "Otherwise I'd have to wear a bag over my head."

And then the galaxy would be deprived of his pretty, pretty face.

"Well then all I have to do is not look at your face," Jayne said simply. "Problem solved."

He shook his head. All these kids were weird.

Once introductions were done, Jayne pointed at the targets at the end of the range. "All right. Let's see what those fancy weapons of yours can do."

That is if your weapons were the shooting kind. If they weren't you probably got a weird look from Jayne.

"You. Weird kid," Jayne said pointing at Eleanor. "Office tells me I need a TA. Whatever that is. You're it."

Assuming Eleanor was there of course.

"I'm not weird," Eleanor insisted. "Why do I have to be the TA?"

"You can move around without walking and poof you're there!" Jayne said shaking his head. "That's weird."

Then he shrugged.

"Plus you were the best at taking out the enemy. You got spunk."

He is capable of speech.

Ugh. A day where nothing seems to work.

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How to be a Hired Gun

Sign-In

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Lecture

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Introductions

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Shooting Range

The TA

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Talk to Jayne

OOC