fandomhigh | Plus We Have a Motorcade [Thursday, March 6, 2014, 1st period]

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government

Plus We Have a Motorcade [Thursday, March 6, 2014, 1st period]

"Right, so if you've been watching the news out of Ukraine--and if you haven't, fix that--you might have noticed that all guys who are presidents aren't exactly created equally. For example if either of the guys I worked for went to Congress and asked for, well, anything at all, really, they would have had a six month fight about it, not given him a big ol' rubber stamp to march on into another sovereign nation."

He arched up an eyebrow. "If any of this is news to you, click off of TMZ for fifteen minutes and read some real stuff, okay? Today I want you to tell me how the president in your country--reality...whatever...thing works. Is he more of a Putin or an Obama?"

He paused. "And if he's a Putin in terms of wandering around shirtless on top of horses a lot, you can just skip telling me that, okay? I want to keep down my breakfast."

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No sentient monkeys, here. Joker shooed Skippy off his desk and the pyjak (http://masseffect.wikia.com/wiki/Pyjak) scurried to lurk under Joker's chair and search his backpack for snacks.

"So... I'm from the future, right?" Joker began. "And there's a whole galactic civilization, so government's a little... complicated. I mean, I'm sure it's pretty complicated for you, now, but where I'm from, it's probably a lot more so."

He paused, trying to figure out where to begin. "Uhhhhh.... let's go top-down, then, shall we? It'll be an adventure! So. The Almighty Rulers of the Galaxy" -- which was said with a deep, mocking voice and some exaggerated hand waggles -- "are the Citadel Council. Three people, one from each of the Council races, who decide the big stuff. Well, I mean, they make the snap decisions. The big big stuff all got worked out by treaties a long time ago, and doesn't really change much. They're on a space station in the Serpent Nebula, which is a long-ass way away from here. Humanity's got an ambassador on the Citadel, so we have a voice in the government, but not a vote. It's been centuries since they added a race to the Council, so we're not getting there anytime soon."

"Each race has their own system of government or whatever -- the Turians are a military hierarchy, the Asari all vote online on everything, stuff like that. Humanity's governed by the Systems Alliance -- imagine if the UN and NASA had a baby, and that baby was actually relevant and important and nobody cut its funding. It's a representative democracy -- 'cause, you know, we're good at those -- with a parliament and prime minister and everything. Red tape, not much getting done, probably a lot like your Washington."

"Under them, we've got what people like to call 'independent nation-states', which sounds complicated, but it just means all of the colonies that aren't, you know, owned by corporations, plus all of the countries of Earth. Your America's still there -- President, Congress, Washington, yadda yadda -- but it's called the United North American States, now, and it stretches from the pole down to Yucatán."

Home stretch, now. "Me, I'm from Arcturus Station, the capital of the Alliance. That's a space station orbiting the star Arcturus, if it wasn't immediately obvious from the name. It's got -- I dunno, a lot of people, but it's way smaller than an Earth city, and half the population's military. There's a military Station Commander who's the absolute authority but mostly leaves the civvies alone, and a civilian Station Council who are basically a trumped-up tourism board. Plus, the Alliance Parliament meets there, so they're always all up ons the local affairs."

That was a lot of information but Josh was stuck at: "Humans aren't on the important council?"

Mmmm, self-involvement.

"Yeah, I know, it sucks. But this isn't Galaxy Quest, dude -- we only burst onto the scene a few ago. Give us some time. We'll be running the place inside of a century, you'll see."

"Damn right we will," Josh proclaimed. "We're--" wicked annoying, "--go-getters like that."

"Well, we are," Joker agreed. "It pisses people off, but that's just because they're jealous. Also, we're grabbing vast amounts of unclaimed territory, licking it, and calling 'mine!'.'

"Do we also have a flag?" Josh checked. "It's important to have a flag."

"Of course we have a flag!" Joker replied, incredulous. "Everybody has a flag!" He tapped around a bit on his omnitool and pulled up an image of the Systems Alliance flag, which started as a flat rectangle and then began flapping in an imaginary wind, in glowing translucent 3D.

[Note: I don't think we ever actually see a flag in the game, but this (http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120402213924/masseffect/images/1/15/Systems_Alliance_Codex_Image.jpg) is the Alliance's logo/seal. So... maybe that on a solid field, in UN blue & white?]

"Oooh, shiny," Josh said approvingly.

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Plus We Have a Motorcade [Thursday, March 6, 2014, 1st period]

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Re: Tell Josh about your president!

Re: Tell Josh about your president!