fandomhigh | Library, Saturday

Entry tags:

library

Library, Saturday

Sholeh had been very happy to get a call that morning to ask if she could cover today's library shift. Not for any reason other than because she liked being helpful and enjoyed the library of course. There couldn't BE any other reason for her to want to get out of her room and go somewhere calming and relaxing.

Most certainly not because of any insinuations on radio today. That would be ridiculous! Presposterous! Utterly foolish! And, of course, wholly unnecessary, because she trusted Evan. Even if he was in some girl's room complimenting her flexibility. And offering to "spot" her. He was nice. Compliments and offers to help were just what he did.

See? She was completely unbothered. Totally. Undeniably. Completely.

*Sholeh, are you sure you're all right?*

"I AM FINE!" Sholeh snapped and then stomped away to load up the return cart. With possibly a little more force than necessary.

See? She was great!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It wasn't as if Yeul was particularly good at getting out and talking to people either...

"No?" she said, smiling gently. "Perhaps it might be good to think about then. I should do the same." Yeul glanced at Sholeh. "Would you like to talk about what is on your mind today, Sholeh?"

Sholeh sighed, fiddling with her cocoa a bit before answering. "It's stupid," she muttered. "I'm upset for no good reason and I know that, but instead of that making me feel less grumpy, I'm even moreso because there's nothing worse than acting like an idiot and knowing you are and still not being able to stop."

"I do not think the things that bother you are stupid," Yeul said softly. "They may be small things, or things with no rational basis, but the way they make you feel is never stupid."

"Definitely the part with no rational basis," Sholeh mumbled. "Did you hear the radio today?"

The lying radio?

Yeul shook her head slightly.

"No," she said, "I do not usually. I mean to, sometimes, but then I don't get around to it. Or I forget. What did radio say?"

Edited 2014-01-19 00:46 (UTC)

"Something dumb," Sholeh said, staring down at her cocoa like it was the most fascinating substance in the history of the world. "Just insinuated that Evan was...involved sorta...with another girl yesterday. Which is completely not true and anyone who knows him knows that!"

The last came out in a hot rush, because now she was angry on his behalf, too. Which was just what she needed. More upset to add to all the rest.

Sholeh wouldn't mind if Yeul slipped one arm around her shoulders in a half-hug, would she? Yeul thought Sholeh needed it.

"It is not true," she agreed, because Evan did not seem the sort. "And it is unfortunate that radio said such a thing." She hesitated, then asked, "Are you upset solely on his behalf? Or is it more complicated?"

Most things, Yeul found, were more complicated than simple.

Hugs were the very best. If there was one way that Sholeh thought that one-faced sisters had it better, it was that they could get hugs from their sisters whenever they wanted.

"More complicated," Sholeh agreed, looking a little shame-faced. "Even knowing it couldn't possibly be true, I'm still upset."

Dumb thing? Or dumbest thing?

Neither of those.

"It's alright to be upset," she said gently. "Will you tell me why you're upset? You believe Evan would not do such a thing, so what is it that has left you so out-of-sorts? The idea that someone might believe it and make a mistake?"

"If it were just that, I wouldn't be mad at myself for being mad," Sholeh grumbled. "I'm--not entirely sure what's wrong? I'm just mad at him, even though I know he didn't do anything wrong."

Oh, Sholeh. You weren't mad. You were jealous.

"Mad at him for being in a room with a beautiful, glamorous, s-sexy girl. Who was flexible at him."

Yeul, there was still time for you to change your assessment on how dumb this was.

Yeul did not laugh only because she suspected that it would hurt Sholeh's feelings. She didn't want to do that--not when Sholeh was doing such a good job on her own.

"I do not think mad is quite the right word," she said gently, instead, rubbing circles on Sholeh's back. "I wonder if it is more that you are... concerned that he might look at this other girl and think you do not measure up."

Yeul was wise to trust her instincts. If she laughed, Sholeh would probably run, sobbing, into the stacks, never to be seen again.

More than that, she'd put a finger on exactly why Sholeh was so upset. She nodded, miserable, but didn't speak. Just nodded.

Oh dear. Poor Sholeh.

"I expect that you know already that Evan likes you," Yeul said softly, "so I will not tell you to think about that. Instead, will you tell me why you do not believe yourself beautiful? I think you are lovely indeed."

She was very, very young sometimes. Especially for a girl who was about to be seventeen in only a few more days.

"Me? Oh, no, I'm not." She shook her head for emphasis, because that would help Yeul realize she was wrong. "I mean, I don't think I'm ugly--" anymore, though those first few years of puberty had been rough, "--but I know I'm not beautiful, either. Or s-sexy. Zhari's one, Zee's the other, and I'm the third."

Skinny, bookish, and freckled. Anne Shirley would totally feel her pain right now.

"Sholeh," Yeul said, "when people look at you, I do not believe they think you are plain. Quiet, perhaps. Shy and awkward and young, but not plain. Both of your sisters are lovely to look at, but so are you. And why shouldn't you be? You are your sisters' equal. Not inferior to them. Different hair colours, different faces, different attitudes, everything is different--but equal."

She looked searchingly at Sholeh.

"Except, perhaps, confidence."

~~And then Yeul won everything forever for being the best.~~

"I--I--" Sholeh had no idea what to say. Not at all. So she settled for a large cup of cocoa. Which she nearly spat out again because it was still pretty hot.

A few moments of coughing and choking would buy her some time to come up with something suitable to say, right?

Which was why after a bit of wheezing and wiping her eyes, she croaked, "I never thought of it like that."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Library, Saturday

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh

Re: Talk to Sholeh