fandomhigh | Friendship is Always in Fashion, Thursday

Pinkie had spent ages today decorating the classroom to get the mood just right. There were fancy banners with stylized unicorn heads on the walls, golden columns topped with decorative hearts in the corners, and even a giant ice sculpture of a swan next to the door.

Pinkie herself was similarly decked out, wearing the dress Rarity had made her for the Grand Galloping Gala, and looking absolutely delighted to be there.

Because, well, one of the teachers should be, right?

And Derek, on the other hand, was just wearing a suit and tie for the occasion. No, he wasn't smiling. Don't get your hopes up, Pinkie Pie. His contribution to the decorations came in the form of nothing exploding glitter on the class. So. You're welcome, kids.

"Today you're learning about formalwear." Aaaaaaaaand, Derek?

That's alright, Derek, Pinkie was practically vibrating in anticipation and would gladly take up the explaining. "And haute couture!" she gleed. "Which is the fancy-pants way of saying an outfit is handmade and really fancy-pants!"

That was the technical definition, kids. I hope you're taking notes. Detailed notes.

Derek sighed, not about to correct the terminology. Because that meant more time talking to students than strictly necessary. "Suits for men, dresses for women. Sometimes suits for women. Just watch a red carpet sometime if you want to see more examples."

"And sometimes dresses for men, too," Pinkie noted, because hey, let's not leave anyone out here, Derek! "Like that purple sparkly one I found for you that would have really shown off your cheekbones."

Why did Derek submit himself to this class every week? Oh right. Because his life was pain. "I have a suit," he ground out. "I'm not wearing a dress."

No matter how flattering it looked with his shoulder to waist ratio.

"You're such a party pooper," Pinkie said, somehow managing to make it sound both sad and fond at the same time. "Anyway, kids, it's time to get your swank on!" Wait, their what? "We've got lots of dresses and suits of all sorts for everypony! Feel free to mix and match. That's where the real fashion comes from."

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Derek was, of course, there. And looking a little uncomfortable in his tie.

Megan had found the classrooms.

Fear.

She began with an "AAAAAAA!" and ended with a "YOU ARE SO MUCH HOTTER IN REAL LIFE."

"What." HE NEEDED AN ADULT. HE NEEDED AN ADULT.

SHE WAS EIGHTEEN. THAT WAS AN ADULT. LEGAL AND EVERYTHING. HINT HINT.

"You are like, my idol. And you're definitely my favorite character to write," she squeed. "I'm such a sucker for the brooding loner who secretly cares about people trope."

NOT THAT KIND OF ADULT.

"What."

"I mean, my priest AU, where you've become a man of the cloth after so much trauma and then meet altar boy Stiles and then you two do it in a confessional? I wrote that like a year ago and people still comment on it," Megan told him. "Ooh, do you think we can see that here? Or is there a copyright thing?"

THAT ALL SOUNDED HORRIBLE.

Derek was backing away from the clearly crazy woman before this got out of hand. And he cried ever so prettily.

"Oh, god, am I coming on too strong?" she asked. "Sorry, I'm just so excited. I mean, it's just, I am your biggest fan."

Tiny bit too strong, yes.

"What are you even talking about?"

"Oh, right," Megan said, looking appropriately sheepish. "It's just that myself and some online friends decided to take a trip to see the set of our favorite show. And aaaaaah we're totally here!"

"I think you've got the wrong person." Because who in their right mind would watch a show about his life?

"Um, I think I'd know you when I saw you," Megan told him, and pulled out her phone. "See, you're my screensaver!"

Derek batted the phone out if her hand. "How do you have my picture?"

Yeah, getting aggressive was really going to help here.

"It's a screengrab, duh," Megan said, bending to pick up her phone. "Promotional pictures are so hard to find."

"Why am I shirtless in it?" Because you were apparently into casual nudity and didnt realize.

"You're shirtless a lot. And on behalf of all your fans, thank yoooooou."

HE SUDDENLY FELT VERY EXPOSED.

"Are you a student?"

"In college. I'm a mature woman." Sure she was. "Okay, so I have a question. What's up next for you and Stiles? Let's have some spoilers."

"What." Oh dear god. "What did he say to you?"

"Nothing! Yet! AAAAAAAAAAAAA OH MY GOD I MIGHT GET TO MEET STILES okay okay I'm better now," she said, calming down so she didn't embarrass herself in front of hot Derek. "It's just, okay. Like, the twenty years older thing totally just emotionally resonated with me, and I really want some payoff there. The story'd feel cheap without it."

And without the really hot sex, okay.

"I'm not twenty years older--" why was he objecting to that? "There's no emotional resonating," he snapped once he was back in his right mind.

"Um, I watched it. It's never leaving my Tivo, actually," Megan told him. "I wrote so much twenty years fanfic..."

"I don't know what that is." WAS IT BAD? OH GOD.

"Well, since the show didn't show us how you got to be with Stiles in twenty years, I just filled in the blanks," Megan said. So yes, it was bad. Also she didn't actually know how gay sex worked so none of her characters used lube ever. "So like, I told the story of your first date and how Clint tried to tear you two apart, and oh god, the failed mpreg experiment was like a personal achievement for me."

"..."

He couldn't even form words. Congratulations!

"Mpreg?" NO, DEREK. NO.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

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Friendship is Always in Fashion, Thursday - Period 1

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