fandomhigh | Practical Philosophy, Monday, 8/13, Period 1

Tara, back before Ben and Ender, had stopped at J,GoB for an array of cupcakes and pastries when she realized it was still a class day. Which was weird: Even taking time differences into account, she felt like she’d been gone much, much longer than a week. It felt like fall should have come and gone long since. It hadn’t -- was still summer, in fact.

At class time, she set up a picnic table buffet of the baked goods and took Ender’s usual spot under a tree.

“Hi,” she said, speaking slowly but without her stammer. “So … Ender isn’t here, as you guys can probably see. Which means you’re stuck with me for the last class. I don’t think he planned on any final, and there’s no way I’m putting one together. But I wanted to talk about … the philosophy of what we owe each other after we go.”

Being in Ben’s galaxy had put the topic into her mind. So had her conversation with Kennedy the week before.

“Basically, we’re almost all … kind of going to go different places after we graduate. Or, for some of us, after we don’t graduate. But if you make it through even a year here, probably somebody’s saved your life at least once. Do you … owe it to them to try to return the favor, if they need you? Or do you owe it to the people who will enroll in a year, or five years, or ten, to … come back and try to teach, and try and give back a little tiny piece of what this place gave you?

"You might say you do. Or you might say no, that's crazy, I just want to go home and take care of myself for once. That nothing you could do is worth more than your life.

“I don’t know the answer. I know I don’t want to teach after this, but helping my friends … I hope I’ll always want to do that. Even when this place starts to seem really far in the past.”

She gestured vaguely toward the group. “What do you think?”

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"I'm not saying I'm like the only one who's going to have to deal with this when I go or anything," Sparkle replied, crossing his arms over his chest. "Most of us are, huge surprise. But aren't we all some kind of freaks now that we've been here? I mean, here, this stuff is normal. Someday I might find out what it's like to be a chick for a weekend, or meet some kid I'm never going to have or something. But once we go, how the hell do you get back to having a normal life? I don't feel like I owe this place anything. I'm not really in any rush to leave, but it isn't like everyone gets the luxury of their own room and the credibility to say 'publicity stunt' when they go or anything."

Tara was a little taken aback by the answer, and she had to think before she responded.

"I don't know," she admitted. "My world has magic, and most people kind of want to pretend it doesn't happen, so it's ... not too hard to get people to look the other way, usually. I don't know what it's like in places that aren't like that. What do you think you're going to have to do?"

"Don't know," Sparkle replied, frowning. "If I'm lucky, maybe I'll be here until I'm legal and won't have to jump back into the system I was living in. But, you know, this place doesn't exactly fail you, either, so I can't even dick around and hope that'll work. And even if I did manage that much, I'll be going back to jack shit."

There were so many more details he could give, but he figured he'd spare the class the sob story.

"We don't have magic back home. Something weird happens, people notice. Even odds if it ends in me ending up arrested, experimented on, or homeless, I think."

"I don't know anybody who's ended up ... arrested or on the streets or locked in a lab because of this place," Tara said slowly. "I mean, I haven't been taking a survey, but ... word would get around, right?"

She bit her lip. "Sorry. Ender would have something better to tell you."

"Word would get around," Sparkle agreed, pursing his lips a little. "I mean, probably. If it's someone who doesn't really keep touch, though, then how do you know? Like someone going back home and they don't really have a home to go back to anyway or people keep an eye on them because they're problem kids and they don't want you in the neighbourhood and then all up out of nowhere you're just not there or you're some other person completely, they'd think you're nuts or up to something."

Sparkle was maybe over-thinking this.

"You can't know," Tara said. "But ... I mean, you don't know you won't get hit by a bus, right? Or, like, buy a smoothie and find out some crazy lady put weed killer in it."

She drew a breath. "I'm not saying it's a fun risk and you need to 'tralala' about it, but ... I mean, bad things happen sometimes. It's part of being alive. At my old school I would have been bullied and it pretty much doesn't happen here, so ... Fandom has good things, too."

"I like this place," Sparkle replied, and that bit came out easily enough. "People only bug me occasionally about the way I dress. There's a roof over my head, I eat regular meals every day, my classmates are pretty easy on my eyes, whatever. I like it. But that doesn't mean I owe it. And definitely not at the risk of my life. That's the one thing I have that's always going to be a constant, right up until I don't have anything. I'm going to take care of it. Thanks anyhow, Fandom."

Practical Philosophy, Monday, 8/13, Period 1

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