Jeff's Solo Tour of Totally Awesome School-Board Mandated Madness, Wednesday

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Today, the students would find themselves in the Danger Shop... facing Jeff and a chihuahua.

Jeff looked markedly less energetic than usual - in fact, he seemed downright mopey. "Jamie's a dog this week so we won't be doing our planned lesson," he said. "Actually I'm not even sure why we're here because I think the school board was really clear that Jamie had to be in the class, but I brought him and I thought I'd try and teach you after all. It would be a shame if you had to miss a class."

Some people might beg to differ about that, Jeff.

"Anyway, I thought I'd take this week to teach you all about dogs," he said. "Now dogs can be really useful, but they're also treacherous. They make me nervous, and it's for a really good reason. I used to have this dog actually, a Saint Bernard, she'd drool on everything and clobber me mid-conversation and it never ended well."

Apparently teaching with only a yippy dog at his feet made Jeff talky.

"So I think it's important we all learn how to deal with dogs in a social context, because you might think that trying to chat up a woman with a puppy on you is a really good idea, but it's not realistic, is it? I mean, I've tried-- well, okay, I told someone I had a dog because I got nervous about her dog and then she wouldn't stop asking after the dog which made me even more nervous. And that tends to lead to stupid lies. No good can come from lying about dogs, all right? It's a recipe for disaster is what it is."

He stepped aside, pulling on a curtain. On one end of the Danger Shop was a large kennel with a variety of puppies. On the other side was... the inside of a coffee shop.

"What I want you all to do is get a puppy," he said, "and attempt to chat each other up while you have the puppies on you. Or just chat, that can be disastrous in and of itself."

There was a long pause.

Jamuahua yipped.

"...that's it."

Comments

Sign In

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Like you just saw a puppy.

Re: Sign In

[twintuitionist.livejournal.com]

Juliet Darling

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[ihavediabetes.livejournal.com]

Stacey McGill

Re: Sign In

[its-theclimb.livejournal.com]

Miley Ray Stewart

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[wrongkindofsith]

Cara

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[liarallmyown.livejournal.com]

Jace Wayland

Listen to the Lecture

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

At least it's just Jeff this week...?

Puppies!

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

There are simulated puppies of all shapes and sizes! Pick one and grab a leash, then get out there.

Re: Puppies!

[twintuitionist.livejournal.com]

D'awwww, puppies. Juliet found a small, froofy one -- a miniature pomeranian -- and pulled it onto her lap for a good petting.

This was the best session of this class she could imagine.

Re: Puppies!

[its-theclimb.livejournal.com]

"Ohmygosh," Miley gushed, coming over to settle near Juliet with a maltipoo wearing teeny pink shoes. "This class is, like, fun today."

Re: Puppies!

[twintuitionist.livejournal.com]

"Seriously," Juliet agreed. "Mr. Madrox should be a puppy more often -- oh my god yours has shoes."

It was, quite literally, the curtest ever.

Re: Puppies!

[ihavediabetes.livejournal.com]

This class wasn't so bad! Stacey got herself an adorable golden retriever puppy who pretty much barked at everything in that I don't-have-a-real-bark-yet way, but omgsocuuuute.

Re: Puppies!

[wrongkindofsith]

Cara wasn't really looking forward to this class, for completely different reasons than usual.

Still, she crouched a short distance from the seething mass of puppy and whistled softly, clicking her fingers. A sandy coloured puppy trotted over to investigate, yipping sharply and wriggling when when Cara picked him up.

Re: Puppies!

[rilla-myrilla.livejournal.com]

Rilla was missing Dog Monday after this assignment. She tried to cheer up by playing with an adorable beagle puppy instead.

Re: Puppies!

[didntchewgrass.livejournal.com]

Elphaba ended up with a Welsh Corgi (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FkW2D5n8Ns) puppy, which was absolutely adorable.

Then she realized the other part of the assignment. "Chat up?" she said, incredulously.

Re: Puppies!

[iwishiwasbig.livejournal.com]

Really, Dave was more of a cat person, and he was busy trying to work out the logistics of whether or not the coffee would be real, so he just picked the nearest and quietest puppy and went to focus on the important thing.

Coffee Shop

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Then, while wrangling your puppy, attempt to talk and/or flirt with people. The puppies are programmed for (improbable) disaster, so watch out!

Re: Coffee Shop

[wrongkindofsith]

Regardless of the assignment, Cara wasn't paying attention to her classmates, instead focusing on instructing the puppy on how to sit and stay.

It seemed bribery with food worked as well on fake dogs as real ones.

Re: Coffee Shop

[iwishiwasbig.livejournal.com]

Dave went straight to the counter and started trying to order coffee. "I know you're not really real, but does the coffee taste real? Will it help keep me alert?"

Dave's lack of alertness meant he didn't notice his puppy wandering off and taking a piddle. Oops.

Talk to the TAs

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

If they're not distracted by the puppies.

Re: Talk to the TAs

[its-theclimb.livejournal.com]

Miley had a maltipoo and she wasn't randomly learning about breasts. She was very pleased with class today.

Re: Talk to the TAs

[hurtingzeebo]

Sam nabbed herself a great dane puppy, mostly because even puppy-sized, it was still bigger than some full grown dogs.

She totally wasn't trying to train it to eat the other puppies. That would be cruel, even for her.

She might be trying to train it to pretend to eat the other puppies, though.

Talk to the Teacher

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

Who should probably not be allowed to teach classes based solely on his own copious neuroses.

Or talk to Jamhuahua. He only speaks Yip.

OOC

[scary-jeff.livejournal.com]

True story: I hadn't had my own puppy for long when I got Jeff.

I'm still in love with her. So have the my-dog-PBs-for-my-character's-dog icon.

Re: OOC

[its-theclimb.livejournal.com]

HIIIIIIIII SARAH. HIIIIIII.