http://justhisblogger.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] justhisblogger.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2011-02-28 05:49 pm
Entry tags:

The Science of Sexuality, Monday

There was a friendly little basket of condoms right next to the door when students filed into the classroom this morning. Because the teachers cared about your safety.

Well. John cared about it. Sherlock wanted to keep you all out of the gene pool.

"Birth control, as none of you were aware a few weekends ago, comes in various forms," Sherlock began lazily. Someone had also had a holiday filled with crimes and cases. He'd even been shot at! Best. Vacation. Ever. "The obvious condoms, diaphragms, pills, surgeries, and of course abstinence--ask Ms Fabray if you wish--one of which should always be employed unless you plan on caring for a child for more than one weekend."

Hell, even John looked a lot less twitchy and a lot more satisfied with himself and the world in general. He'd gotten his adrenaline fix over the week, and that always made him feel miles better.

... Shut up, it was healthy. "Of course, none of these methods are a hundred percent perfect if you want to avoid having children, except for the abstinence," he said, matter-of-factly. "That's why it's usually best to use a combination of these means of birth control. Condoms can tear, or have holes in them, or react badly to certain oils, or even simply slip off. You run about a two percent chance of getting someone pregnant if you use them. Likewise, the contraceptive pill has a pregnancy rate of two to eight percent. Most problems with the pill occur because the wrong instructions have been given, or you've simply followed them wrong."

"You will be pairing off to practice with the condom. Really, John? Is this necessary?" Sherlock was not impressed with this plan.

"Absolutely," John said, straight faced. Though there was probably a reason why they were in a classroom with faucets...

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] shes-got-legs.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Princess Ariel

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[identity profile] 3patchproblem.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Ah, London.

Sherlock was quiet and calm for a change. This could not last long.
icecoldfrost: (diamond form: cold hard heart)

Re: Sign In

[personal profile] icecoldfrost 2011-02-28 05:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Emma Frost

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] chief-cheerio.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Quinn Fabray

Re: Listen to the Lecture

[identity profile] chief-cheerio.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Seriously, two percent? Quinn got so distracted focusing on that, and how she probably needed to pee on a stick, that she was unable to look properly smug about the abstinence shout-out.

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] tripledmyself.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:19 pm (UTC)(link)
Nathan Young

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[identity profile] shes-got-legs.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Wait, wait, wait. So the point of the exercise was to fill up the condoms like water balloons?

Just when Ariel was worried she was getting bored with this class, something like this came around. She grabbed a handful and didn't even care if she wound up with some holes, because that would make it even more fun!

She may have been missing the point, though. That's what you get for introducing an element of water and getting wet into the mix.
notmyownage: (*can has a lightsaber!*)

Re: Sign In

[personal profile] notmyownage 2011-02-28 05:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Claudia Donovan

Re: Listen to the Lecture

[identity profile] tripledmyself.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Nathan had expected the safe sex lecture at some points so, as soon as it started, he half paid attention and half wondered what sorts of balloon animals you could make out of condoms. It would probably depend on the size. Magnums would make great poodles.

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[identity profile] tripledmyself.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:30 pm (UTC)(link)
"Planning on starting a condom war?" Nathan asked, wandering over. "That's a lot of fucking condoms right there. I'm impressed by your dedication to the activity."
wwiii: (Uniform)

Re: Sign In

[personal profile] wwiii 2011-02-28 05:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Warren Worthington III

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[identity profile] shes-got-legs.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:34 pm (UTC)(link)
"Better safe than sorry!" Ariel chirped. "And, seriously, did they really think this through? Did they really say to themselves, 'Let's give a bunch of teenagers some condoms and tell them to fill them with water,' and not expect a war to break out?"

And then she giggled, ducking her head closer to Nathan as she lowered her voice, "You think I could get one of the teachers with one?"
onlymistaken: (z - zelda - quarantine)

Re: Sign In

[personal profile] onlymistaken 2011-02-28 05:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Cally

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[identity profile] tripledmyself.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:37 pm (UTC)(link)
"I not only think you could get one of them, I think you should try," Nathan said, always one to encourage carnage. "Which one would you hit? The shorter one looks like he'd be too exasperated to move but the other guy looks like he'd do a fucking great impression of a pissed off drowned rat."
onlymistaken: (Default)

Re: OOC

[personal profile] onlymistaken 2011-02-28 05:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Because you live in a ridiculous timezone. Not fake. Just ridiculous.

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] faithandscience.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:40 pm (UTC)(link)
William Murdoch

Re: Listen to the Lecture

[identity profile] faithandscience.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
William... was kind of goggling at the condoms, actually. They were so thin. How did they not tear more often?
onlymistaken: (snark - hands on hips)

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[personal profile] onlymistaken 2011-02-28 05:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Fine, Cally's first condom sprung a leak. Fair enough.

The odds on the second one also spitting water the moment she placed it under the faucet, though...

The third, at least, was different.

It exploded in her hands, instead.

"Oh, honestly! My people reproduce by cloning. What exactly are you trying to teach me, Fandom?"

Re: Activity: Water Balloons!

[identity profile] shes-got-legs.livejournal.com 2011-02-28 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
"I'll hit the one," Ariel smirked, "you hit the other. We'll strike at the same time. Only you get Mr. Holmes. He's an easier target due to his height, but I have to see him in Investigations Club at the end of the week."

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