fandomhigh | What NOT To Do In A Fight / Period III / Week 5 (Atreides/Deadpool)

There was another person in class with the usual pair of teachers today. One who looked like you might not like him when he’s angry, only with a goatee. Which, as we all know, is how you can tell the guy is clearly evil.

“We have a very special guest today, class,” Deadpool said brightly. “And no, not someone they made come set you guys on the path of law abiding citizenship because he was arrested for dealing dope and put in jail so he’ll be telling you all some horrifying American History X style redemption story so you will all think twice about life.”

What.

“You know, I might need to meta that. How about... Canadian Sociology Z? Yeah, I kinda like that.”

Ghanima simply gave a Look to their visitor that spoke volumes. Did you see what she had to put up with now? Did you?

"Thankfully, we are not being asked to put on another anti-drug seminar," she said smoothly. "Some of you may remember my last entry into that field, and I'm sure that was memorable enough for you all. I know I feel no need to repeat it."

"Instead, today, you may have noticed that we have a guest, who looks similar to a previous holographic-guest. They are not the same people, I assure you. Mr. Durden is here for a simple reason: Some fights have rules. Most don't. But a lot of people will still fight as though there are rules." Ghanima smiled sweetly. "We call those people 'suckers.'"

See what teaching her slang did, Tyler? Those were not words a Princess Royal should be using.

Ghanima was using slang. Deadpool was making no sense at all.

It was good to be home.

"There can be rules," Tyler said. He was kinetic; it took him a moment to fall back into his classroom rhythm, and he paced to discharge the extra energy. Did he know any of these people? "You just have to agree. You can say no hair-pulling, or no shoes, or no bringing a buddy in. But the moment -- the second -- the other guy decides winning is more important than your rule, congratulations.It's a real fight. Even if it never goes that way, you got to assume it might."

He sounded like he relished the idea.

Deadpool nodded in agreement. “Which is why morals are only good when you’re not in a fight,” he added. “Well, most morals. You gotta have some or else you’re just some crazy, rabid animal to be put down.” A beat. “So... Daken.”

"Someday there will be a Deadpool-to-English dictionary, right?" Ghanima asked Tyler before waving it off. "Irrelevant."

"Even those of you prone to non-violence whenever possible can utilize this," she continued. "Throw sand in someone's eyes. Yell 'look over there,' and pull down their pants or throw a coat over their head and run away. Being practical and breaking the unwritten rules is sometimes the best way to get out of a fight before the violence really begins."

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You could tell the difference because dummies rarely developed alternate personalities.

Tyler was there, ready to take on anybody who really wanted to hit him.

"Mister Durden!" Zack was smiling about a mile wide as he walked up to Tyler, waving happily at him. He totally remembered Tyler! From Fight Club! ... Man, he missed Fight Club. "Hi!"

Why hit a dummy when you could spar with somebody who could move out of the way?

"Zack!" Tyler said, after just a moment of oh-god-bouncy-boy-is-named-what?. "Hi back. Is this a social call, or are you looking to fight dirty?"

Edited 2011-02-02 19:09 (UTC)

"I see no reason why it can't be both," Zack replied, with a little nod and a fair dose of mock-solemnity. "I haven't had a good spar in what feels like forever."

... Missions where he ended up having to kill his coworkers didn't count.

"I suppose it wouldn't kill me to fix that for you," Tyler said, shifting into a more game posture. "How's life otherwise?"

He might just punch Zack while hew was answering. This was, after all, about fighting dirty.

And, really, Zack needed to be fought dirty at. He was probably going to try to keep it more or less clean, himself. He had his honor to protect, after all.

... And he didn't want to accidentally kill Tyler by summoning the Gaian god of fire, or anything.

He put his hands up and grinned a little, all the same.

"Otherwise? Not too bad. Reserves has been quiet, nothing has tried to end all life on the island in at least a couple of months, now..."

"Really?" Tyler took a slow, lazy swing at Zack's ribs, low on the left. "You know that means you're past due."

"Oh, probably," Zack agreed, with a step back and a slight turn to avoid that fist, while his hand went out in an attempt to grab Tyler's arm.

... He wasn't certain what he'd do with it once he had it, but if Tyler was going to move slow, it was practically an invite.

"If something big and nasty does show up, at least that gives me something to do around here without having to go home on the weekends, I guess."

"That's what you do with your weekends?" Tyler sped up, twisting his arm so it went past Zack's grasp and toward his chest. "Go home, kill things, come back on Monday?"

"Pretty much!" Zack took the arm to the chest, but really didn't seem too bothered by it. Maybe the playing dirty part was the fact that he wasn't completely human?

... Zack was a cheater by default. Sorry, Tyler.

"It keeps me from getting rusty, anyhow. Even if there hasn't been much work back home."

And now he was kicking out a foot at Tyler's shin. Because shin-kicking was totally mature.

"Ouch," Tyler ground out between his teeth, and kicked back with his opposite leg.

Shinkicking was awesome.

"Are you graduating this year, or next?"

"This year," Zack replied, kind of skipping on one foot for a moment with a soft exhale as Tyler's foot made contact. "I'm not really sure what I'm going to do with myself if things stay quiet for us, but I'm sure I'll figure something out."

Zack took a moment to contemplate his options, here. And then went for the classic 'shoulder to the chest' move, leaning forward and lunging in like a six-foot-something battering ram. Because how could you possibly go wrong with that?

"Jesus."

Tyler ... went down pretty easily under the strain of a six-foot battering ram. But he reached up to clutch at Zack's hair, hoping it'd bring him down too.

Fighting dirty, right?

"Gah!" Yep, there went Zack, going down right along with Tyler. Because, really, now. Zack had a lot of hair. It was difficult to miss, if that was what you happened to be reaching for, here. And since he was still moving with the momentum that he'd slammed into Tyler with?

"Hair. Hair. Hair."

Zack went sprawling right along with him.

Tyler rolled away, coughing as he detangled his hand from the mass of hair. He'd hit the ground hard. "I think," he said, "that was the natural next step from shin-kicking."

"Shin-kicking is about as dirty as I play," Zack replied, frowning just a little as he scooted back and rubbed at his head. Ow. "But that was a good move, right there."

"Not a lot else to do when a guy with more muscle than you tries to shove you down," Tyler shrugged. "I could've bit you but that's a little up close and personal."

"Ew," Zack replied, eloquently. "Yeah, I appreciate the hair-pulling, when you put it like that."

Really, he'd been bitten by plenty of things in his lifetime. But most of them weren't, you know, former teachers or anything.

"Anytime, man," Tyler said. "The biting thing would just be gross."

What NOT To Do In A Fight / Period III / Week 5 (Atreides/Deadpool)

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